Midweek Movie Mouth-Off: the worst jobs in movie universes

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Sometimes, I think my job sucks. Not this one, obviously, but my daily grind. I’ve got a hell of a commute, cranky customers and long, boring hours in front of a computer screen. But, after watching The Revenant, maybe my job isn’t so bad after all. I can’t imagine living in that day and age. Imagine being a fur-trapper back then, in such a harsh, unforgiving environment. You’re vulnerable to so many things like frost bite, bear attacks and Tom Hardy.  And I know that that’s what life was really like back then, because it’s based on a true story.

But never mind “real world” examples, even fictional movie universes must suck for the average Joe. Imagine you’re a hot shot engineer with the project of a lifetime that’s going to launch your career, but your ‘new and improved’ Death Star is blown up before the Galactic Empire even finished their payment plan. Ha, we won’t even talk about being a Stormtrooper. What about being a cop in the Marvel universe? Too bad, you’re officially kind of useless and the most you’re going to get is a pat on the head from Captain America. Alternatively, you’re a cop two weeks away from retirement in any movie universe ever? Sorry buddy, you’re not getting that gold watch.

As much as we love to live in fantasy worlds on screen, you’ve got to admit some movie universes wouldn’t be that great to stay in. So which movie job do you think would be the worst?

The views and opinions expressed in this article are those of the author(s) and do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of Critical Hit as an organisation.

Last Updated: January 27, 2016

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Tracy Benson

All about movies, board games, cider, sci-fi, fantasy and geek culture.

  • LegionZA

    Being a janitor in Trainspotting and having to clean that toilet would be pretty sucky

  • Henchman for Doctor Evil.

  • Hargrim

    Redshirts

    So what do I win?

  • Sandelk

    I think being a stormtrooper is pretty sucky. Wearing a suit that does nothing against the standard blaster and always being rushed ahead of the guys with jedi powers, seems to be a bit unfortunate.

  • VampyreSquirrel

    Construction worker in any city that there’s a hero.

  • Hammersteyn

    Stunt double in a Michael Bay movie or maybe the guy who worked the boom Mike in Jack and Jill

  • Andre116

    Any male lead in any romcom. They obviously lost their balls some time ago.

  • The astronaut with the camera following Sandra Bullock in Gravity.

  • The editor in any Ricky Gervais movie…

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