Friday Debate: Which biltong is best?

3 min read
82

Biltonnggggggg

I remember being introduced to biltong. I had just started dating my now husband, and he’d gotten some snap sticks brought to Holland by someone returning from South Africa. I learned that it’s one of those things that South Africans miss the most overseas, so I was curious to try it. To be honest, I wasn’t overly impressed. It was so dry and hurt my teeth to eat, but the flavor was pretty nice. Oh, I had so much to learn.

Once we moved from Holland to Joburg, I had access to way more biltong and finally found my preferred version of it. You see, I think biltong needs to have some fat on it. Without the fat it’s just dry, almost flavorless shards of meat – I might as well eat the biltong spice on its own instead. But when there’s a bit of fat on it, I can actually enjoy biltong in any state; I don’t care whether it’s wet, medium or dry. It’s like perfect morsels of salty, spicy, meaty goodness that you can legitimately eat anywhere and at any time.

Since then, it seems they’re making biltong out of so many more meats. Originally, you could get beef or game biltong, and that was about it. Now, I’ve seen everything from bacon biltong (Yum!) to chicken biltong, which is an absolute abomination.

But not everyone feels the way that I do. There are those who like those chili sticks that are obviously intended as torture devices rather than food. There are those who actively seek out squid biltong. And even heathens like Darryn who don’t think fat belongs on biltong. You know what is even scarier? I’ve heard talk from some Americans that proper beef jerky as it’s made in the South is just like biltong. I can’t say that I trust this concept, though, as the only jerky I’ve ever had was weird, processed junk.

Read  Friday Debate – Freddy totally won in Freddy vs Jason

How do you take your biltong? Or are you one of those even weirder people who prefers droewors?

The views and opinions expressed in this article are those of the author(s) and do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of Critical Hit as an organisation.

Last Updated: May 26, 2017

Zoe Hawkins

Wielding my lasso of truth, I am the combination of nerd passion and grammar nazi. I delve into all things awesome and geek-tastic. I believe people should stop defining themselves and just enjoy playing games, so let's get on with it!

  • Alien Emperor Trevor

    Dry, no fat, no chili.

    If I wanted wet, fat & spicy I’d eat your moNO SHUT UP!

    • Wait, YOU eat biltong? You realize it isn’t cooked, right?

      • Hammersteyn

        Ooooooooh snap

      • Alien Emperor Trevor

        Of course. It’s cured, unlike you.

    • Skittle

      Moist, fatty, spicy

      If I wanted a dry, shrivelled husk I’d eat yo-

    • Hammersteyn

      No biltong for you!

  • Chilli bites. Or really fatty beef biltong.

  • Sageville

    I don’t mind the fat vs no fat stuff, though I cannot stand wet biltong, that’s just called “Raw meat” to some of us….

    • Hammersteyn

      You mean @disqus_DoEH3TsffU:disqus

      • MonsterCheddar

        @disqus_DoEH3TsffU:disqus will try and braai biltong.

        • Sageville

          He is like that…

  • Nat biltong!

  • Hammersteyn

    I just love putting all kinds of meat in my mouth

  • Skittle

    Food Lovers babalas biltong

    • HvR

      so disgusting it makes you puke and the you feel better

  • ElimiNathan

    If you guys know of a really good place to get biltong in Cape Town let me know please. I’m from the Eastern Cape so am used to amazing biltong, haven’t found any worthy this side yet

    • Wait a few weeks and everyone person will look like biltong…

      • He He He… right in the water crises! xD

      • ElimiNathan

        Haha. Cut so deep man

    • Sageville

      Too dry neh?

      Too soon?

      • Hammersteyn

        XD

    • HvR

      With the exception of Die Vleis Winkel all the good butchers retired and closed down.

      I just make my own

      • ElimiNathan

        Will check out Die Vleis Winkel thanks!

        • HvR

          Awesome butchery always worth the visit, they do not make bland biltong on large scale like Fruit and Veg so do no be surprised if they are sold out

          • ElimiNathan

            Will try make a mission early tomorrow

  • Matthew Figueira

    BILTONG 4 LYF

    • Original Heretic

      They don’t make biltong out of cabbages.

      • Matthew Figueira

        I wish they did 🙁

        • Jim of the Banana

          Cabbage chips… shudder!

    • Alien Emperor Trevor
      • cute AF

      • Matthew Figueira

        Hahaha BEST <3

    • Admiral Chief

      MATTY’S BDAY 4 TODAI

      • Matthew Figueira

        WOOT GIMME BILTONG!

        • Admiral Chief

          Come over, I can gief to you nao

          • Matthew Figueira

            <3

  • MonsterCheddar

    Wet, beef biltong with lots of fat.

    • Hey look at that. We agree on something

      • Hammersteyn

        Amazing

      • MonsterCheddar

        /)(

  • Original Heretic

    My dad used to make the best biltong ever….
    Great, now I’m sad.

  • VampyreSquirrel

    The edible kind is best.

    • if its bone dry then its over and done past its edible stage

      • Hammersteyn

        Beef flavoured dust

  • Admiral Chief

    Beef, not too wet, not too dry, with some fat.

    End of discussion

    • Hammersteyn

      Bietjie vanilla, but acceptable

      • Admiral Chief

        Koriander, peper, gooi hom

        • Hammersteyn

          Ja!

      • Admiral Chief

        Eland biltong is ook flippen lekker

    • Alien Emperor Trevor

      That is the end of the discussion. I accept you concede to being wrong.

      • Admiral Chief

        You braai until dry biltong, so, no

        xD

  • Lisa

    OT. Rising Storm for free at HumbleBundle.com

  • HvR

    Beef little fat then it can be rare bilting.

    More fat and needs to be past the red/pnk stage of being dry

    Ostrich, springbok, eland, kudu needs to be dry to the bone.

    People making biltong from crap like shark, chicken etc should shot and made into Spur patties
    *spur table rattle*

    • Admiral Chief

      HAHAHA. #Triggered

      Kudu/Eland/SB not dry to the bone, but not as rare as beef. Agreed on the fat/rare ratio

    • miaau

      SHARK Biltong.

      Had some twenty years ago…. It was so Salty as to be, in my opinion, dangerous to my body. BUT that was not the worst crime. Once I tasted past the salt, it had no real flavour, was boring.

    • miaau

      “Beef little fat then it can be rare bilting.

      More fat and needs to be past the red/pnk stage of being dry

      Ostrich, springbok, eland, kudu needs to be dry to the bone.”

      Yes, enough said.

      I prefer chunks I can chew, with a bit of fat on.

  • miaau

    You are all wrong.

    The Best biltong is that which my wife makes at home, from game meat. Gemsbok, Kudu, mostly. Rooibok soon, in June.

    Due to various allergies, my wife uses Lemon Juice and not Vinegar as a softener and then spices it herself. It is nice. We like it.

    BUT, in general, Beef Biltong is good, if not over spiced. I like a bit of spice and the taste of meat.

    • Magoo

      Kudu biltong is the best.

  • Francois Knoetze

    Local butcher over here in Knysna makes killer billtong that almost tastes like steak. had a mini freak out when I first got hold of it,

  • Jim of the Banana

    Definitely not chicken biltong… that stuff is vile.

  • Jim of the Banana

    My favourite is (and has always been) KUDU! There’s just something about it.

Check Also

Friday Debate – Freddy totally won in Freddy vs Jason

Who really "won" the main event of Freddy vs Jason? The Springwood Slasher? Mama Voorhees'…