Oh my goodness, E3 week is upon us. All the gaming news! All the reveals! All the upsets! All the cups of coffee I’m going to have to drink to stay awake for the gauntlet of day 1 news! Hoo-boy, I think I’ll need to spend this weekend sleeping… all 48 hours of it!
Last weekend, a new Mortal Kombat X champion was crowned. Hooray! At the same time, Darryn retained his title and his fake wife, and his competitor Dave got teabagged. Double Hooray! In other awesome local news, Bravado secured their spot at ESWC Montreal. They’ll be competing for their share of a $75 000 prize pool!
Metal Gear Solid V is getting microtransactions? Oh Konami, why are you doing this? You’re breaking our hearts!
Apparently Last Guardian is DEFINITELY MAYBE going to be at E3. Why is this under worst stories you ask? Come on, we can only have our hearts broken so many times. I have a bucket load of tears ready for the disappointment that is to come from it not being announced… again.
Don’t own a Wii U? Dying to play Splatoon? Here’s the closest thing you’ll get… Splatoon recreated in Mincecraft… sorta!
Did you avoid work this Wednesday? How could you not, we had Contra for on offer for crying out loud! Look, here’s the link. It’s Friday, take a load off why don’t you?
Lastly, be sure to read Darryn’s diary on a typical day at E3. It is 100% legit!
Header of the Week
Geoff did something magical this week. A typo lead to the creation of this masterpiece:
A winner for sure! And then I remembered Darryn did this magnificent piece too:
ION of the Week
Steam refunds are being exploited? Sheesh, you all had a lot to say on that. The article gathered up 219 comments, and no, they’re ours to keep, we ain’t refunding any of them!
Wow, MLG are hosting their 100th event in October. “What an achievement!” I thought, expecting hundreds of people to comment on the article as a I wrote it. I only got one measly response. Why do you all hate me so? *CRIES*
Batman of the Week
That Mortal Kombat X victory provided a ton of self esteem apparently. Darryn smacked us all down confidently, proving yet again that he is the one and only Batman!
Cabbage of the Week
I am genuinely disappointed with this week’s results. Believe it or not, Zoe was a legit cabbage… I had the lead fair and square. Then she came out of nowhere and pushed me down to that muddy bottom again. Dammit!
Comment of the Week
Worms World Party is getting remastered, something Jonah Cash is very excited for:
I’d buy this for 5 to $10 but only if I can play it on PSN so that I can drop a concrete donkey on Hammersteyn’s head. That would make me smile a lot!!
Well that’s not very nice. Hammerstyn, what’s your response?
That’s funny because I call my penis concrete donkey.
I don’t even want to try and understand the implications of that comment. Jonah Cash dropping your very own… on your head… VISUALS AAAAH!
Want some candy?
And keeping with the Thor theme…
Lastly, you can’t miss this gorgeous trailer. HOLY SMOKE!
Last Updated: June 12, 2015