Sheesh, I’ve truly slaved away this week. I can count the number of articles I’ve written so far on one hand! Coincidentally, I typed them all with the very same hand because I was too busy using the other to stuff my face with Oreos. NOMNOMNOM zero credibility tastes so good!
Possibly the best road trip photo ever #playwithoreo pic.twitter.com/aHBDpE1zkE
— Sam Wright (@IAmSamW) April 1, 2015
Before you run off to enjoy your long weekend (I’m sure many of you took half day), check out the news you may have missed this week…
Best Stories
Don’t forget, we’re giving away an awesome Bloodborne prize! We really want to see people suffer… erm… win. Be sure to enter if you’re a sucker for punishment… I MEAN JOY! In other fantastic news, the cabbage to employee ratio in Lazygamer has gone up once more. REJOICE!
Worst Stories
Thanks to Geoff’s kind loan of his Wii U over December, I got to experience the amazing ZombiU. It makes me super sad that a game that good went by unnoticed by many, and as a result, there will be no sequel.
When last did you play Minecraft? Remember how competitive it was, you know, when your digital neighbour had cooler buildings than you did and you needed to resort to swatting? Yeah me neither, which is why I think this is one of the most ridiculous cases of it I’ve read about.
Lastly, Zelda won’t be arriving this year. If you listen carefully, you can hear the sound of Sandy crying himself to sleep each night.
In other terrible news, the cabbage to employee ratio in Lazygamer has gone up once more. OH DEAR!
Random Stories
A hardcore gaming onesie… MADE OF 100% WIN? Please excuse me while I ask Gavin to pay me early so I can rush out and order IMMEDIATELY! We always suspected that Darryn was the most sadistic Sims player in the world. Then we read these stories… Darryn now looks like an angel.
It was April Fools’ yesterday. It brought with it a bunch of random, fake news. Zoe rounded some of the better ones up for your viewing pleasure right here.
Best ION Header
I know you’d all destroy me if I chose food or tech over a model on my week back. So with my cowardice in mind, it’s easy to see why Samantha Baily wins the ION header award this week.
Most Comments
In a completely unrigged manner, this article has won the most comments – raking in a whopping 154 of them. Sheesh, you all had a lot of hate for that onesie!
Least Comments
One poor staff member wrote an article that ended up with one measly comment. I’ll give you a clue. His name starts with a ‘d’ and ends with an ‘arryn’.
Batman Of the Week
It was a tough week with some stiff competition. Zoe had more batarangs up her sleeve though, and walks away with the Batman Batgirl of the week award!
Cabbage Of the Week
The rules explicitly state that I am ineligible for this award because I haven’t been here a full week yet. With that in mind, the award should rightly go to Gavin, because he is right at the bottom of the food chain at the moment. Upon hearing this news, he threatened to fire me, which is why Sandy is now the sad ginger cabbage kid in the picture above. Sorry porra bro!
Header of the week
I received a hefty bribe to make this header of the week. Little does Geoff know that it would’ve won even without his millions of randelas. Jason? JASON? JAAAAAAAAASSOOON!!
Comment of the Week
HvR wins the award this week with this gem of a comment on April Fools’ day:
Another 3 jokes:
https://www.onedayonly.co.za/m…
http://blog.eu.playstation.com…
http://mindsportsa.co.za/
Best gags I ever did see!
This gets a bonus mention too because it made giggle endlessly, as well as question whether I really am just another case of it. Hammersteyn hits the nail right on the head upon reading that I am back with the Lazygamer crew once more:
Worst case of Stockholm syndrome ever this.
Bonus Content
Who doesn’t love some extra goodies? Here’s Darryn’s video for the week:
And Zoe’s:
And mine (thanks to Geoff). Put your sound down for the first 5 seconds:
Last Updated: April 2, 2015
RinceThis
April 2, 2015 at 12:35
He’s BACK!? http://media1.giphy.com/media/yj5UdA4elp8Wc/giphy.gif Since when did journalizms standarz slide to much?!
Hammersteyn
April 2, 2015 at 12:40
His departure went something like, If you love something set it free. Really, you’re free get lost. GO! No don’t come back! GO! Dammit he got back in the office!
Kensei Seraph
April 2, 2015 at 13:00
Hahaha.
hairyknees
April 2, 2015 at 13:05
Hahaha xD
Dutch Matrix
April 2, 2015 at 12:43
How dare you use my majestic image for a cabbage?
RinceThis
April 2, 2015 at 13:00
This is true!I take it ALLZ back!
hairyknees
April 2, 2015 at 13:45
<3
Hammersteyn
April 2, 2015 at 12:37
Lazy bastards, guess your not working tomorrow if this is up on a Thursday XD
Congrats HVR, that third joke has me in stitches.
Pariah
April 2, 2015 at 12:52
Incidentally, stitches are what they require after that 3rd degree burn. 😀
Hammersteyn
April 2, 2015 at 12:38
Congrats to Zoe as well,nice way to “Wrap” up this week
http://i.imgur.com/AyZjVUb.gif
Dutch Matrix
April 2, 2015 at 12:42
So, some guy links to 3 gags and wins comment of the week. And some other guy writes an EPIC Mass Effect comment and not win?
This thing is rigged.
Dutch storms off, booting a rock and fuming endlessly.
Hammersteyn
April 2, 2015 at 12:46
http://www.reactiongifs.com/r/tldr.gif
Dutch Matrix
April 2, 2015 at 12:47
Yes well. It’s a pity the people here got the attention span of a bundle of hay. Missed out on a good one!
Pariah
April 2, 2015 at 12:53
Good? Man, that wall of text should not have to be read by anyone. Maybe try paragraphs and formatting in future? That way we might actually read it. 😛
Dutch Matrix
April 2, 2015 at 12:53
LoL. But then you be missing the point of it! 🙂
Pariah
April 2, 2015 at 12:54
All I got from it was “This guy’s gone hyper. Fan boy. Next.” XD
Dutch Matrix
April 2, 2015 at 12:56
Heh heh! I hear you. It does, I think, pay homage to the awesomeness that is Mass Effect though.
Pariah
April 2, 2015 at 12:58
All the more reason for nice formatting, so that we get to enjoy it too. 😀
Dutch Matrix
April 2, 2015 at 12:58
No!!! Go read even a tiny bit of it, then you will get the going hyper!
Ryanza
April 2, 2015 at 12:54
The Mass Effect comment even looked like a box.
Dutch Matrix
April 2, 2015 at 12:56
Dude, if you want to call me “Doos” do it to my face.
Pariah
April 2, 2015 at 12:57
http://img1.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20130424095911/glee/images/3/3f/Ooooooooo_ooh_oooh_cat_shrek.gif
Hammersteyn
April 2, 2015 at 12:59
http://www.reactiongifs.com/r/dude.gif
RinceThis
April 2, 2015 at 13:26
I really need to get the rest of this series!
Ryanza
April 2, 2015 at 12:58
lol. I’m just talking about how a person is always standing behind a box when playing Mass Effect. No need to climb in your doos.
Dutch Matrix
April 2, 2015 at 13:07
“Hello. I am Geralt and to prove my manliness, I will grow a beard.”
“Hello. I am Commander Jane Shepard and fuck this dick measuring bullshit! I got me a Reaper to destroy!”
Brady miaau
April 2, 2015 at 13:48
point
Ranting Raptor
April 2, 2015 at 14:02
But was it Raptor Rants tl;dr levels?
Lord Chaos
April 2, 2015 at 14:10
Made you look like a pre-schooler.
Ranting Raptor
April 5, 2015 at 10:11
Wow
Hammersteyn
April 2, 2015 at 14:10
And then some. He didn’t even use paragraphs
Wraith
April 2, 2015 at 14:39
Nah, he didn’t take it to the 7th degree.
Mossel
April 2, 2015 at 14:17
Hahaha that guys’ expression is awesome!
hairyknees
April 2, 2015 at 13:06
Sorry 🙁 if it counts, the award is just for show… IT MEANS NOTHING! 😛
Dutch Matrix
April 2, 2015 at 13:10
Downvote for you. Also, I am slamming the door in your face when you GET TO THE CHOPPA!
hairyknees
April 2, 2015 at 13:44
GET TO ZE CHOPPA!!!!!!!!!!!
Lord Chaos
April 2, 2015 at 13:46
‘Cause no one read it? 😛
Gavin Mannion
April 2, 2015 at 13:47
Mocking the MSSA is a sure fire way to get street cred.. didn’t you know?
Dutch Matrix
April 2, 2015 at 14:03
Also to burn quite a big hole in your bank account, right? RIGHT??? Just kidding. I still weep manly tears everytime I think of that incident of yours.
Umar
April 2, 2015 at 12:47
Grats to my main man, Ham Ham!
Brady miaau
April 2, 2015 at 12:48
Yeah, great weekend. Those travelling, be safe.
Going away, rest, relax. Um. With extended family. Maybe not rest and relax.
RinceThis
April 2, 2015 at 13:01
Ain’t that the truth 🙂
Hammersteyn
April 2, 2015 at 13:02
Gonna clean the liquor cabinet this weekend.
Brady miaau
April 2, 2015 at 13:03
Ah, yes. Important too. Cannot let cobwebs and the like take root.
Polish each bottle, eh?
Lord Chaos
April 2, 2015 at 13:48
Mine also needs a good Autumn cleaning.
Hammersteyn
April 2, 2015 at 14:10
XD
Kensei Seraph
April 2, 2015 at 13:12
Some end-of-the-week gifs (1 of them is actually a jpg) for @rincethis:disqus.
https://boagworld.com/blogImages/1.gif
http://netdna.webdesignerdepot.com/uploads/2013/04/Ceric2.gif
https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/92/6f/40/926f4078d335a5d9b9592dbe9791a2df.jpg
http://fc07.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2012/312/b/5/b57663f7cae9930d64ea3edf52560473-d5kem6l.gif
CAE9872
April 2, 2015 at 13:38
Where is Rince!!! RINCE! RINCE!
You will be pleased to know I EVENTUALLY watched Guardians of the Galaxy. And it is not bad by any stretch but I don’t quite see what all the fuss is about. Maybe I is just older but hell they all seem to get along very well, very quickly for people trying to kill each other.
Story seemed…forced. And end was a little wishy washy if you ask me.
So my two cents. Enjoyable but way too hyped in my opinion.
Brady miaau
April 2, 2015 at 13:39
Watched, best not to dwell on the weak points, just enjoy. Sort of like Elysium. If you think about it, you spoil it.
Geoffrey Tim
April 2, 2015 at 13:40
Thank you. I’ve been saying this since I saw it…It was mildly entertaining..but just…ok. Don’t understand the hype.
Brady miaau
April 2, 2015 at 13:47
Hype train sort of gathers its own critical mass and then snowballs into a bigger thing, not because of the thing, but because of the number of people hyping the thing more people join in. Peer pressure and stuff also plays a role, I am sure.
Sageville
April 2, 2015 at 14:13
Yeah, but u hate anything mainstream… such a hipster
Gavin Mannion
April 2, 2015 at 13:47
It was fun… I’ve mainly forgotten it though…
CAE9872
April 2, 2015 at 13:39
So the Steyn Meister makes another COW mention. His gif search engine is way too good as well though.
justlikemo
April 2, 2015 at 14:10
wtf Why SANIC adventure, I can’t believe I just watched the entire video!
justlikemo
April 2, 2015 at 14:10
WTF means ….
hairyknees
April 2, 2015 at 14:24
Hahaha that video made me giggle XD
justlikemo
April 2, 2015 at 14:26
I was like that dude, had to pull the headset away for a sec when it started, too loud.
hairyknees
April 2, 2015 at 15:39
I did warn though 😉 sorry!