Right, so as you know, roughly half of the Lazygamer team has been digitally crippled by Telkom’s new LTE Acceptable Usage Policy, which itself isn’t really acceptable. That means that we’re unable to do basic things like download games because 256kb/s May as well be 0kb/s. Worse is that we’re unable to connect to any multiplayer servers for anything – which means no Overwatch, no Alienation or Call of Duty for us.
It means that for the next two weeks until the monthly data reset happens, we’re stuck playing single player games. That’s not really a bad thing! We get to clear up our backlogs, right?
But what should we play? You tell us. What are the very best single player, offline games to play right now? What do you play when you don’t want to – or are unable to – play games with other people?
Last Updated: September 16, 2016
Alien Emperor Trevor
September 16, 2016 at 10:41
Well I could give you suggestions of SP games, but you’d still have to dl them. 😉
RinceThis
September 16, 2016 at 12:24
ouch
Viking Of Science
September 16, 2016 at 10:45
Well shit. There’s always MGS V, I mean, it worked better in Offline mode anyway 😛
Alien Emperor Trevor
September 16, 2016 at 10:48
That’s what I’ve been playing while waiting for my line issues to be sorted out.
Original Heretic
September 16, 2016 at 10:46
Witcher 3 GOTY. No brainer.
RinceThis
September 16, 2016 at 12:24
Is that a physical copy?
Original Heretic
September 16, 2016 at 12:26
That was my thought, yeah.
Viper_ZA
September 16, 2016 at 10:46
Grab a buddy and dust off that console, make a weekend out of it? Binge away with games like D3 and what not (it’s better on console anyway) xD
Jonah Cash
September 16, 2016 at 10:47
Uncharted 4, Deus Ex MD. (Although I haven’t bought Deus Ex myself yet)
Original Heretic
September 16, 2016 at 10:52
Still gotta get to Uncharted 4. I was an XB360 guy, so I never jammed 1-3.
And before I jam 4, I wanna do the rest so that I follow the story as a whole.
Jonah Cash
September 16, 2016 at 11:02
1 is a bit old, but the story is well worth a go. 2 is brilliant and 3’s movement is on par with most new games. 3’s story was a bit worse than 1 and 2 in my opinion. But 4 is the ultimate Uncharted game and gives a more than satisfying end to a great series of games. Enjoy it.
Guava_Eater
September 16, 2016 at 10:47
I have a huge backlog, on PS3, Xbone and PC….
Top 5:
1. Thief
2. Assassins Creed (LoL I’m still on Black Flag)
3. F1 2016
4. Gears of War 1-3
5. Kindoms of Amalur: Reckoning (Almost done but not quite finished…)
Aries
September 16, 2016 at 10:48
Black flag is worth it really
Viper_ZA
September 16, 2016 at 10:49
Agreed, was the last AC game I actually enjoyed thoroughly.
Viking Of Science
September 16, 2016 at 10:56
Rogue wasn’t half bad either, actually…
Original Heretic
September 16, 2016 at 10:49
Kingdoms of Amalur is pretty cool. But I found it got far too easy near the end. Your character is so overpowered, it stops being fun and challenging.
miaau
September 16, 2016 at 10:53
totally, massively. Played it through while lying on my back after a leg operation, it was awesome and kept me going. But the game balance towards the end was way out.
Alien Emperor Trevor
September 16, 2016 at 10:54
That’s what I found as well, had to power through some serious dullness in the last quarter of the game to finish it.
miaau
September 16, 2016 at 10:58
But the end was much faster, cause I just chucked my rings at enemies and they died, in the start it took many, many hits to kill the buggers.
The game rot started on the 2nd continent, really. It felt rushed and unfinished. Which, I understand, it was.
The Order of the Banana
September 16, 2016 at 11:30
Absolutely! Kingdoms of Amalur was and is an amazing title.
Craig Lotter
September 16, 2016 at 14:01
You could of course make it difficult for yourself by not chasing all those pesky side quests that get in the way and level you up in the process!
Original Heretic
September 16, 2016 at 14:03
Ignore quests?!?!
Craig "Crios" Boonzaier
September 16, 2016 at 12:57
Busy playing Kindoms of Amalur: Reckoning now, finished the game, busy with the Dead Kel DLC.
Ye it got easy, but i am enjoying every bit of that R.A. Salvatore lore.
Craig Lotter
September 16, 2016 at 14:00
Assassin’s Creed games with ships in them are the best by far!
HairyEwok
September 16, 2016 at 10:48
Well it depends on the power of their PC rig…. If its strong then easily Witcher 3 GOTY, if not then well, pinball.
??????? ????? ™
September 16, 2016 at 10:56
FTL
Raptor Rants
September 16, 2016 at 11:24
EEEEFINNNN TEEEEEE EEEEEELLLLLLLLL
??????? ????? ™
September 16, 2016 at 11:31
Jy weet dit!
Milesh Bhana
September 16, 2016 at 12:52
so appropriate! Telkom LTE FTL!!!
??????? ????? ™
September 16, 2016 at 10:56
TW3
miaau
September 16, 2016 at 10:57
Master of Orion…. 2
Civilization III – offered the best warmonger opportunities.
What about the Total War Warhammer games?
Or, just putting it out there, what about that new Family and Friends Visiting game I keep hearing my wife go on about? That might be worth it, I understand it does not need fast internet. And it has many, many flavours and DLC, such as Video Night, Braai, Sit-down three course meal, Make-it-Yourself Pizza and, of course, Tea and Cookies. Edit * Breakfast, bake bread, put in the oven 30 minutes before the guests come. Hmm.
??????? ????? ™
September 16, 2016 at 10:57
Just something else…..256kb/s is not THAT bad. Better than nothing
Alien Emperor Trevor
September 16, 2016 at 10:59
I’d rather have nothing.
Original Heretic
September 16, 2016 at 11:01
Sounds like someone from the 90’s!
miaau
September 16, 2016 at 11:04
2007, year I got married, we had 384kbs ADSL. Was ok, then. 3 Gb cap!
HvR
September 16, 2016 at 11:09
Pfft 90’s most people had 40kbps dail up, rich people had 128kps ISDN
Original Heretic
September 16, 2016 at 11:12
And if you had 40kbps, you were happy!
HvR
September 16, 2016 at 11:13
If your R7 weekend Telkom call didn’t drop you were happy
Alien Emperor Trevor
September 16, 2016 at 11:13
Truth!
??????? ????? ™
September 16, 2016 at 11:18
Best R7 spent ever!!!!!!!
Dane
September 16, 2016 at 11:43
In the 90s, games were 3mb in size and took up a sixth of your hard drive.
HairyEwok
September 16, 2016 at 11:57
I remember Sims with all its DLC munching up the HDD space like it was nothing.
HvR
September 16, 2016 at 11:11
Lots of online chess for Geoff then
The Order of the Banana
September 16, 2016 at 10:59
Solitaire!
Alien Emperor Trevor
September 16, 2016 at 10:59
How about a nice book instead?
miaau
September 16, 2016 at 11:00
Yeah. Just re-read DUNE. Man, that was a lot of fun. Read it easily 15 times, know the book pretty well, but still loved reading it.
Original Heretic
September 16, 2016 at 11:01
I’ve done that with Feist’s Magician. Damn I love that book.
miaau
September 16, 2016 at 11:03
Yeah, me too. Me too. Own original and the extended edition of that book.
Now, Dune Messiah et al (maybe also the ending, writing by Herberts son and another guy), THEN Servant of the Empire Series. Yeah. All on hardcopy.
I get the feeling you would like my bookshelves. Spent years collecting books, some old Sci-fi from the 60s never reprinted, for example.
Original Heretic
September 16, 2016 at 11:04
My collection is also rather extensive, so ditto!
I started collecting the Magician graphic novels as well, but they stopped making them. Or at least I think so, cause after the 1st two, I just never found more of them to buy.
For me that was one step closer to the movies!
miaau
September 16, 2016 at 11:07
I imagine so. AND you are writing / trying to write your own, I remember you once said.
Fantasy, I take it? Or should I not be asking? 🙂
Original Heretic
September 16, 2016 at 11:10
Yeah, fantasy. I’ve got an urban fantasy setting one done and published, but that was YEEEEEAAARS ago, so let’s not even go there.
Then life happened and I stopped writing for a long long time.
Now busy with another, but also struggling to find the time to write and polish it up properly.
But everyone who’s read it so far (well, the approximate three quarters that’s written so far) is loving it, but, me being me, I’m not happy with it! Needs more work.
miaau
September 16, 2016 at 11:14
Yeah, hard on yourself, but in something like writing a book, it counts. Polish is important, little things can turn readers off.
Urban fantasy is not really my thing, but that is just a personal preference. I do not enjoy stories set in the now, with fantasy elements. I would rather it be way out there, in a new world.
Original Heretic
September 16, 2016 at 11:18
My new one is high fantasy.
Whole new world, magic system, etc. I’ve got this huge elaborate history that, when I try and tell people about it, I need charts and diagrams for them to understand it!
Ah crap… I said whole new world…
Alien Emperor Trevor
September 16, 2016 at 11:25
A whole new worldddddddddddd, a new fantastic point of view!
Raptor Rants
September 16, 2016 at 11:25
I’m like a shooting star!
Original Heretic
September 16, 2016 at 11:28
Aaaarrrgh!! I had to sing this once in a show. Well, I was actually playing the role of Aladdin in a panto.
It’s the one show I’ve done that I simply CANNOT watch. I get ten minutes in, see how shitty it was, shudder at the thought that I was in a show like that, and try and burn the DVD.
And then my wife stops me, laughing her ass off.
Raptor Rants
September 16, 2016 at 11:27
*perks up* Sounds awesome *goes to look on Kindle Store*
Original Heretic
September 16, 2016 at 11:29
Not even published yet! It’ll be a couple of years before I even let an agent see it!
miaau
September 16, 2016 at 11:28
Sounds, very, very cool. Indeed it does
Dutch Matrix
September 16, 2016 at 11:43
All you heathens! Ever heard of Sir Terry Pratchett? Of course not! Heathens…
Original Heretic
September 16, 2016 at 11:47
Ah, Pratchett is amazing. The imagination on that man was absolutely staggering! Not to mention his memory.
Did you know that when some okes got together to make out Anhk-Morpork, they consulted him, asked him for his own reference maps.
But he didn’t have any. And yet he still knew the EXACT layout of the entire city.
miaau
September 16, 2016 at 11:49
Well, yes.
His work is great, but in a totally different way to, say, the Feist books we were discussing.
His books, some of them, held a mirror up to us, our society, our ways. That was clever, I liked that.
Night Watch. Great book. My favourite, easily. Vimes is, for me, the greatest Prattchett character by far.
Raptor Rants
September 16, 2016 at 11:29
Name?
Original Heretic
September 16, 2016 at 11:33
The old published one was called Open World: Awakenings. Wasn’t even published down here. Didn’t do well at all. A few critics like it, said I had a flowing style to my writing that made it easy to read. But the public never seemed to latch onto it. I can’t even find it on the internet anymore… *sob* But it was many years ago.
And the new/current one, well, I aint spilling anything on that until I’m happy with it!
Alien Emperor Trevor
September 16, 2016 at 11:04
I lost track of that whole series. Last time I read was something about Arutha’s kids, and when I looked again there were entire trilogies I hadn’t read.
Original Heretic
September 16, 2016 at 11:05
I’ve got them all, read them all.
Magician’s End came out last year. The ending brought bit of tear to my eye.
Alien Emperor Trevor
September 16, 2016 at 11:08
I think I stopped reading somewhere in the Serpent War books, can’t even remember if I finished all of them hehe.
miaau
September 16, 2016 at 11:06
more, more. Lots. And, they are, in my opinion, better than Magician and the few that followed after. Much better. Series that starts with Talon of the Silver Hawk is awesome.
I own them all, in hardcopy AND E-book (only the newest, not the original 4 books – too pricey)
Raptor Rants
September 16, 2016 at 11:28
Such a good set of books
Alien Emperor Trevor
September 16, 2016 at 11:02
It’s been many many years since I last reread any of the Dune books. That’s probably my most read series after the LOTR books. And I still like them, unlike the LOTR books. 😉
miaau
September 16, 2016 at 11:27
Yeah, LOTR, writing style was just, well, heavy. And carried on and on to belabour a point sometimes. Have never re-read LOTR books, after reading them twice when I was sub 13
Alien Emperor Trevor
September 16, 2016 at 11:32
I don’t think I’ve read them since my mid-teens, which must be… um… 5 *coughcough* years ago. I didn’t have much choice in reading material back then so I reread what I had a lot, and even then I used to skip every single song & poem – haven’t read a single one of them. Now I’m so spoiled for choice that I have trouble deciding what to choose next.
Original Heretic
September 16, 2016 at 11:37
Yah, agreed.
I can appreciate the fact that it was the books that started an entirely new genre that we all love now, but trying to read them now is like pulling teeth. Very archaic style.
The story is great, which is why they became awesome movies, but for an intro to fantasy, I’d recommend OTHER books to people.
Lu
September 16, 2016 at 13:36
Any of you read the Silmarillion? It’s like reading a King James bible.
Original Heretic
September 16, 2016 at 13:43
Ugh, I’ve picked it up a couple of times, intent that THIS time I’ve going to finish it.
It’s a freakin’ boring ass history book. The content is stellar, but the execution leaves much to be desired.
Lu
September 16, 2016 at 14:19
Yeah I read it half way the first time before giving up. Reread it from start to finish when I got the insane idea to do a Middle Earth book marathon, starting at the Silmarillion and ending with Return of The King. There’s just too much content compressed into one book. There was a spin off called The Children of Hurin (one of the stories in the Silmarillion that they elaborated) which was actually readable though.
Original Heretic
September 16, 2016 at 11:00
HA! I was JUST about to say this, too!
miaau
September 16, 2016 at 11:00
Ouch, you mean download ebooks, right? 🙂
Geoffrey Tim
September 16, 2016 at 11:16
Precisely what I’ve been doing. 😀
miaau
September 16, 2016 at 11:16
care to share what you have been reading?
??????? ????? ™
September 16, 2016 at 11:19
“42 fun ways to prepare 2min noodles”
b1nd3r
September 16, 2016 at 11:05
having a similar problem, im stuck in lesotho for work and nothing works out here, been jamming metal gear solid v for the 5th time and lego batman 3 atleast this has some really comical moments.
Lu
September 16, 2016 at 11:13
I may get some hate for this but Fallout 4, modded to the max. I’m running +- 20 gb worth of (non cheat, immersive and texture) mods and it’s like playing a whole new game. Once Witcher 3 goes on sale I’ll nab it.
Original Heretic
September 16, 2016 at 11:20
I wouldn’t mind a modded Fallout 4. But I’m on PS4 and Sony screwed us.
Lu
September 16, 2016 at 13:16
Yeah I saw that. It’s a pity considering that Bethesda games are generally made to be modded.
Sony: Putting the “Con” in console.
Raptor Rants
September 16, 2016 at 11:21
Faster Than Light
Witcher 3
Undertale
Final Fantasy VIII
Reus
Sonic & All-Stars Racing Transformed
Worms Armageddon
XCom (Choose your fav)
Alien: Isolation
??????? ????? ™
September 16, 2016 at 11:31
XCOM!!!!
Reus is pretty darn good actually
The Order of the Banana
September 16, 2016 at 11:29
Disney Infinity 1.0, 2.0 and 3.0!
The Order of the Banana
September 16, 2016 at 11:30
Terraria!
Ottokie
September 16, 2016 at 12:03
^this
Pariah ???
September 16, 2016 at 12:42
Yeah. This, 56mb download so shouldn’t take more than a few hours to download. And then, it’ll eat hundreds of hours of SP goodness. Ah.
Deceased
September 16, 2016 at 11:35
This is how I see this play out:
Geoff: I need Bioshock Remastered.
Admiral: Who’s got Bioshock Remastered for that guy?
Emperor: I do, but this is for me.
Geoff: Can’t you download some more?
Emperor: Oh, sure. And while I’m downloading Bioshock Remastered for everyone, who takes care of my kids?
Pariah: I’ll take care of your kids, if I get some extra Bioshock Remastered for it.
Emperor: Extra Bioshock Remastered?
Pariah: Well, I’m not gonna do extra work if we all get the same.
Admiral: All right, okay, fair is fair. If you do extra work, you get extra Bioshock Remastered.
Discuss: Oh. [ All murmuring ]
Darryn: Who’s gonna keep track of who gets how much Bioshock Remastered for how much work?
Pariah: Hello. I can do that. I’ll keep track of everyone’s Bioshock Remastered, you know, in exchange for Bioshock Remastered.
Geoff: That’s not a real job!
Pariah: Oh, and downloading Bioshock Remastered is?
Read more at: http://transcripts.foreverdreaming.org/viewtopic.php?f=364&t=22643
Alien Emperor Trevor
September 16, 2016 at 11:38
Fake. There’s the implication that I’d be willing to help someone.
Deceased
September 16, 2016 at 11:42
I’ve came to the conclusion these last few months that you’re actually a good guy/emperor – hence why you’re cast as the bread-baker XD
Pariah on the other hand scares me O.o
He’s what I would call: “Schwifty”
*buh-dm tssss*
Dutch Matrix
September 16, 2016 at 12:11
Pariah scares you? PARIAH??? I guess when you see a butterfly you shit your pants and run???
XD
Deceased
September 16, 2016 at 12:13
Nobody exists on purpose, nobody belongs anywhere, everybody’s gonna die.
Pariah ???
September 16, 2016 at 12:41
boo
Deceased
September 16, 2016 at 13:42
It is not a Rick and Morty fan? 🙁
Pariah ???
September 16, 2016 at 13:48
Never watched it, don’t plan to. But I was more going for “I’m giving you a fright, BOO”. XD
Deceased
September 16, 2016 at 13:54
I assumed as much 😀
But… but… I was hoping you’d get the “Schwifty” reference 🙁
Just putting it out there man: Rick and Morty is insanely good 🙂
Pariah ???
September 16, 2016 at 13:58
Thanks for the tip, but I probably will never watch it. 🙂
Just doesn’t quite pique my interest. I’m SUPER full of shit when it comes to series.
Who’d have thought? XD
HairyEwok
September 16, 2016 at 12:01
Reading this immediately made me think about a Rick and Morty episode. Then I clicked on the link and felt proud of myself.
Deceased
September 16, 2016 at 12:11
XD
??????? ????? ™
September 16, 2016 at 12:05
Seems legit
Pariah ???
September 16, 2016 at 12:45
I will literally never offer to take care of kids for Bioshock. Seriously. Terraria, Path of Exile, any decent MMO, maybe. But then, I wouldn’t really be taking care of their kids, so maybe Bioshock is the right game for that.
That’s meta as fuck yo.
Also, I don’t do extra work. Except for biltong. And chocolate. Probably more chocolate.
And lastly. Fuck Bioshock.
Deceased
September 16, 2016 at 13:56
wait… O.o
It’s becoming clear now… yes… how did I miss this?! O.o
Pariah isn’t someone that’ll enjoy Rick and Morty…
Dane
September 16, 2016 at 11:40
You brave, beautiful bastard. 😛 Had to have a laugh.
I presume any guy with a keyboard that lights up has played these, but if not I recommend them purely on story-telling capabilities and environment-immersion. (Critical aspects for me in any single player game)
Far Cry 3
Borderlands 1 (if you have not played any yet)
Dying Light
Dishonored
Skittle
September 16, 2016 at 11:51
Diablo 3.. oh wait, no.
Thorsten
September 16, 2016 at 11:53
Pillars of Eternity. 55 hours in and still scared of dragon xD #DragonMustFall
Spy Master Tokashi
September 16, 2016 at 11:57
Dark Souls 1,2,3 (online is still awesome but you can still enjoy them offline)
The Witcher 3
Don’t Starve
City Skylines
Thief
Batman games
Shadow of Mordor
HairyEwok
September 16, 2016 at 12:02
AND AND Shadow of Mordor GOTY is on sale now. Just a shame they wont be able to DL it XD
??????? ????? ™
September 16, 2016 at 12:03
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL
Lord Chaos
September 16, 2016 at 18:46
I got it just fine… O… wait… we’re talking about Hellkom and not my ISP
Hargrim
September 16, 2016 at 12:26
When the internet’s off, I turn to Mr. Meier.
Civilization or XCOM
??????? ????? ™
September 16, 2016 at 12:35
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
??????? ????? ™
September 16, 2016 at 12:36
I like you
V@mp
September 16, 2016 at 12:37
The question is if there’s any SP hame without a mandatory, multi GB, day one patch? Nothing springs to mind :-p
V@mp
September 16, 2016 at 12:38
SP *game*
Milesh Bhana
September 16, 2016 at 12:57
Bloodborne, X-Com
Milesh Bhana
September 16, 2016 at 12:58
am i that naive that i believe all the noise we’re making will result in a better AUP?
(well i have to believe that, can’t afford to supplement more money into my interwebz so this “capped” LTE account of mine had better work for me till the contract ends)
Gavin Mannion
September 16, 2016 at 14:33
#TelkomAUPMustFall ?
Guava_Eater
September 16, 2016 at 15:08
I got a response just now from the ASA after lodging my complaint about the Uncapped LTE. I’d like to pass it on. Was pretty generic
Gavin Mannion
September 16, 2016 at 15:27
you can send it to geoff @ lazygamer.net , but we did get a bad response as well 🙁
Guava_Eater
September 16, 2016 at 15:44
Done 🙂
Melasco
September 16, 2016 at 15:10
– Mass Effect Trilogy
– All the Souls games
– Skyrim
A couple of hundred hours right there. 🙂
chimera_85
September 16, 2016 at 15:10
What about their capped LTE service? I have the 50+50GB LTE package and lately my internet has been so slow it’s driving me insane.
Lord Chaos
September 16, 2016 at 18:44
I’ve got a LOS 2Mb line, NEVER drops below 2Mb, averaging around 500 GB per month,
justlikemo
September 16, 2016 at 16:08
Worms party my place! Bring your copy of worms 1 n ur laptop and we can LAN it! Old school
justlikemo
September 16, 2016 at 16:45
Bear with them, they are working hard on the back end to assist with this issue.