Destiny, a video game which now finally feels complete after it got a 20gb patch one year after launch, is a much better game this week. While I could wax lyrical about the various new tweaks, tune-ups and overall polish that said patch has delivered, that’s a post for another day.
I’m all about the Taken King right now, an expansion which is going heavy on the marketing so please ignore me while I accept this non-descript sack of petty cash for my hyperbole.
Naturally, you’re going to see an advert or two for The Taken King. But none of them, none of them can top the Japanese promotion for the game:
Can’t watch the video above? Then let’s break it down like a Degeneration X intro:
Japanese laundromat: Surprisingly disappointing, because years of anime have led me to believe that each washing machine would be a Gundam-level mecha that could protect the island-nation in case of a Kaiju attack.
That, is a bitchin’ Destiny Hunter cosplay that is now giving me ideas of replicating for myself for next year’s project to undermine people.
Yes folks, that is actor Ryo Katsuji, who has become a regular in PlayStation 4 adverts in Japan. And double-yes, he’s making his own PSSSSHHHHHHHH sound as he removes his helmet. AWESOME.
Aw yeah, you’ve got nowhere to run to now. Just like the people who are forced to read my Destiny posts.
Normally, R1 in Destiny makes a Hunter fling a solar-infused knife into enemy skulls. In Japan, it apparently allows you to toss out retail copies of The Taken King. I’ve been playing the game wrong, all this time.
There is nothing more frightening than a dedicated Destiny player who is hell-bent on getting you to join his fire-team for a raid on King’s Fall.
NOTHING.
Thing is, I know those eyes. Those are my eyes when I first started playing Destiny and had to convince people to join me and have a good time while dying constantly in the Vault of Glass.
And that’s also my face after a successful raid that rewarded me with Willbreaker armour. Awwww yeah son, good times!
Honestly, I wish this was the cover for the retail edition of The Taken King. This is just pure joy for me. The expansion finally launches next week, so forget about getting your laundry done. The Tower needs you, Guardian.
Last Updated: September 11, 2015
Umar
September 11, 2015 at 10:06
Did….did he just make his own psssssshhhhhhh sounds when taking off his helmet?…DID HE JUST MAKE HIS OWN FUCKING PSSSSSSSSHHHHH SOUNDS!???? LOLOLOL HOLY CRAP. Best!
Kromas untamed
September 11, 2015 at 10:33
#Japan
HairyEwok
September 11, 2015 at 11:45
O.o Too much Nippon in one video!
Kromas untamed
September 11, 2015 at 11:51
Needs more Mecha! 😛
Jonah Cash
September 11, 2015 at 12:27
Holy crap!!! Why????
Jonah Cash
September 11, 2015 at 12:30
The first thing I said to my wife after standing up from falling over with laughter is the dude just made his own psssshhhh sound for his helmet… this wins the net for September!!
Ottokie "Yahtzee"
September 11, 2015 at 10:07
Destiny actually looks like a really fun game, it intrigues the warframe player in me.
Dutch Matrix
September 11, 2015 at 10:15
A good add does not a good game make…
Ir0nseraph
September 11, 2015 at 10:16
I am loving the changes, the Taken King is going to suck up hours of my life again, and I can’t wait.
The new live action trailer is also awesome.
https://youtu.be/RpDLxs8z08A
Nikola
September 11, 2015 at 11:45
Sooo awesome:))))
Admiral Chief Returns
September 11, 2015 at 10:44
Huehuehue
HairyEwok
September 11, 2015 at 11:42
Awww man. See Japan truly does have all the fun :/
Decembermaloy
September 11, 2015 at 11:42
Darryn, We’ll Jam some Destiny for sure next week. I don’t want to spoil much in the way of story so I will be sticking to the Year One Stuff until the 15th.