EA Sports UFC 2 wants you to do more than just hit your opponent harder than they can hit you…hey. Martial arts has evolved over the centuries, going from primitive “hit with stick” techniques to exotic nonsense that ridiculous TV shows try to convince you made for the “deadliest warrior”. At its current apex, mixed martial arts seems to be the fistacular method of dealing damage that is in favour these days.
Of course, I prefer to not have my face reduced to something that resembles a raw hamburger patty, which is why I’m perfectly happy to talk smack in an online bout of fisticuffs when I’m leagues away from being physically harmed. So I might be a tad bit more insufferable than usual, when I pursue my lifelong dream of writing smack for upcoming MMA fighters whose interviews are about as exciting as watching furniture being appraised.
When it comes to dropping concussions on players, EA Sports UFC 2 will be going down the sim route with a series of physics that looks less like two action figures attempting to create the beast with two backs and more like two mountains of muscle attempting to clobber one another into a blackout state. Here’s the latest gameplay trailer, and some hyperbole-heavy features copied and pasted below from the press release:
- Knockout Physics System – A revolutionary new physics-driven hit reaction and knockout system delivers more visceral, more rewarding, and more authentic KOs than ever before.
- Next-Level Submissions – Surprise your opponent with a flying armbar from the clinch, or with a quick transition from a knee bar to a heel hook. The addition of standing submissions and submission chaining (sequences) takes UFC 2’s grappling game to the next level.
- Dynamic Grappling – For the first time in any MMA game, experience the freedom of independent fighter control in every grappling situation. Simultaneous two-fighter interaction brings the ground game to life with greater responsiveness and variety.
- Ultimate Defense – You can’t hurt what you can’t hit. Greater control over your fighter’s head movement lets you to slip and dodge incoming strikes with amazing fluidity. Add an improved blocking and parrying system to the mix and you have new tools to fend off your opponent’s most devastating attacks.
EA Sports UFC 2 will be out March 15, a date where CM Punk will still retain his legendary streak of 0-0. Presumably, I’ll attack a guy so hard that I’ll make orphans out of his children. If he has a wife, I’d imagine that she’ll die from pure grief shortly after the bout ends.
Last Updated: January 13, 2016
Original Heretic
January 13, 2016 at 13:00
It’s still completely absurd to me that they’ve included CM Punk in this game. He’s still in talks for his first UFC fight, nowhere close to even announcing his opponent or when his first fight is going to be!
EA must be grasping for big names, convinced that nobody outside MMA circles are going to know many of the fighters. THIS ISN’T WWE!!
RinceThis
January 13, 2016 at 13:20
WEEEEEE!
Skyblue
January 13, 2016 at 19:20
Watch Dana White’s Looking for a Fight on Youtube, they may have found CM’s first opponent. Personally I’m not holding my breath as they have a huge Golden Goose atm with the whole of the UFC calling him out. I was actually surprised that The Reem never called him out after his last fight ;-p
Original Heretic
January 14, 2016 at 08:42
That new guy has had one MMA fight and he still has to earn his fight with Punk. WTF?!?! What has Punk done that legit MMA fighters have to EARN the right to fight him?!? Ludicrous.
Skyblue
January 14, 2016 at 08:47
Agreed, he’s just a name and not an MMA name at that.
RinceThis
January 13, 2016 at 13:20
OvG knows all about KOs tehehe
Jim Lenoir (Banana Jim)
January 13, 2016 at 13:41
post that classic video
RinceThis
January 13, 2016 at 13:55
What ever could you mean? https://www.facebook.com/nick.reay/videos/313232965233/?l=6912442185203169660
Alien Emperor Trevor
January 13, 2016 at 15:05
Are you sure he knows all about KOs? He didn’t seem to know much about that one.
Skyblue
January 13, 2016 at 19:22
If only Brock learned to hit as clean as that… and learned to enjoy getting punched in the face… and kicked in the liver… he could have been a contender I tell you ;-p
Jim Lenoir (Banana Jim)
January 13, 2016 at 13:40
The only place where CM Punk will be successful in MMA – hehehe
Original Heretic
January 13, 2016 at 13:49
Very likely! The only pro wrestler that had some modicum of success was Brock Lesnar. And after everyone stopped being in awe of a guy that big moving that fast, they realized that hitting him in the face considerably diminished his skills.
Well, plus he had shit leaking into his insides, so I suppose he had that going against him!
The D
January 13, 2016 at 14:07
My client, BUUUUURRRRRRRROCK LEEEEEEEESNAR, is a walking Konami code of brutality and aggression.
Original Heretic
January 13, 2016 at 14:17
Until Cain Velasquez hits him in the face. You can still see the scar he got there.
Skyblue
January 13, 2016 at 19:25
I always preferred the liver kick that ended his MMA career
Original Heretic
January 14, 2016 at 07:58
It wasn’t even a liver kick, it was just a straight kick to the gut. But with his guts still recovering and Reem landing kick after kick there, it was too much for him.
If Brock ever does come back (doubtful as that may be despite all the rumours and talk), he seriously have to work on his striking. More importantly, how to handle BEING struck.
Skyblue
January 14, 2016 at 08:46
You can’t teach someone to enjoy getting hit, you’re either Robbie Lawler or you’re not.
Original Heretic
January 14, 2016 at 08:54
Well apparently Urijah Faber once offered to train Brock for that! Imagining those training sessions has us laughing for months!
Skyblue
January 14, 2016 at 14:23
Lol