Meet Lawrence Croft, a bizarre homosexual Tomb Raider

3 min read
[Update: I misread the source, there is no proof that Lawrence is gay but rather he has been created for gay people.. I don’t think it changes anything though. I still don’t think your average homosexual would like to be seen as this]

The gaming industry is currently being bashed from all sides by the feminists, transgenderists and pretty much every minority group that either isn’t sure of their gender, someone else’s gender or feel that their gender isn’t being treated with as much respect.. and then this happened.

Meet Lawrence Croft a genderbend of the more famous Lara Croft…

tumblr_movfq9JjF41snd66po8_500 tumblr_movfq9JjF41snd66po9_1280tumblr_movfq9JjF41snd66po10_250 tumblr_movfq9JjF41snd66po5_500tumblr_movfq9JjF41snd66po7_250 tumblr_movfq9JjF41snd66po6_250tumblr_movfq9JjF41snd66po3_500 tumblr_movfq9JjF41snd66po4_1280tumblr_movfq9JjF41snd66po2_1280 tumblr_movfq9JjF41snd66po1_500

So yeah.. there’s that.

And no my headline isn’t making a slur, according to the source that I have for these images, Lawrence is what would happen if someone made a game like this featuring a gay lead character.

Personally I’m pretty offended.. I know many gay people and the vast majority find this tasteless stereotype offensive and it in no way helps their cause in being accepted as equals in society.

Ah but it’s just a bit of harmless fun that is being used to showcase how society objectifies women isn’t it? It’s awesome how the harmless fun can exist when it’s being perpetuated by the online hate mobs but when it occurs in mainstream society it’s degradation and objectification.

Read  The second Tomb Raider trailer ups the island action

Just because Lawrence is gay doesn’t mean he’d parade around topless in a video game, if you wanted to showcase a real lead character who still held attraction to your market (female admirers) you should maybe go for something like this.


See fully clothed, tough, independent and yet still obviously feminine. Or if you want an archaeologist willing to show a little flesh that homosexual men and straight women could relate to then how about.


Hey but what do I know, I’m just your average cisgendered privileged male who obviously cannot understand the nuances of being sexually confused. I mean all of us were born perfectly happy with who we are and have lived a life of privilege and comfort with no issues whatsoever.

So are you offended by Lawrence Croft as well and why?

Also, I lied.. I really really couldn’t be less offended by Lawrence if I tried. If there is a market big enough to justify the development costs of Lawrence Croft then they should seriously make this game. I’d even buy a copy to help. Anyone want to start a Kickstarter?

Last Updated: June 25, 2013

Gavin Mannion

I for one welcome our future robotic overlords

  • Happy Hamster

    Thats so wrong in a million ways

  • RitterBruder

    too Damn funny !!! is it wrong to laugh at this !! hope not !

  • Sir Rants-a-Lot Llew

    I am actually very unsure how to respond to this article.
    So I’m just going to say “live and let live” and then move on from there.

    • Argentil

      But imagine if there were Lawrence Croft adverts in magazines, on gaming sites etc, imagine if Lawrence were inescapable? You’d see his glistening abs, and protruding bum in promotional shots all over the internet.

      • Sir Rants-a-Lot Llew

        Meh. I would ignore it and look at other games instead. I don’t want it so I shall look at things I do want. If others want to see it then that is their choice. Who am I to dictate what others may or may not want?

  • Vampyre Squirrel

    I’m just going to act like I didn’t see that and close this tab…

  • Theo Steenekamp

    It cannot be unseen.

    • Captain Minion TallTwit

      Apply this to your eyes. It may help.

      • Admiral Chief Groot Wors

        NOT HELPING!!!

      • TechniKyle

        Why? Because it’s a man? Do you see me running around telling other gay men to jik their eyes when we see half naked women in Soul Calibur or DOA?

        • Spathi

          If half naked women is something that irks them, sure, do it. Some men find other men repulsive. Some men like other men. Some women find men repulsive. All women love looking at other women!! 😛

        • I saw an 80 year old in a bikini once.. I needed bleach.

          • TechniKyle

            I. Have. No. Words.

          • Sir Rants-a-Lot Llew

            I’d need more than bleach at that moment

          • Admiral Chief Groot Wors

            Thats it, I’m DONE reading the comments section in this article!

          • Admiral Chief Groot Wors

            Where do you hang out to see that?

            I need to know so as to protect myself and my family from seeing that!

          • Jim Lenoir (Banana Jim)

            Let me guess… Camps Bay!

          • loftie

            not sure whether to upvote for funny or downvote for planting image…

        • Tauriq Moosa

          I think cos it’s gross. I mean, damn.

          • TechniKyle

            Oh I see. Wrong context. My bad.

      • Captain Minion TallTwit

        I didn’t mean to offend or insult anyone with the JIK picture. I jest.

        • TechniKyle

          OK, I’m sorry too. Want a banana? It’s a fruit!

          • Jim Lenoir (Banana Jim)

            Hey don’t drag me into all of this… 😛

  • Trevor Davies

    It’s not the same, Indy has manly chest hair.

  • Hammersteyn

    Well that’s enough internet for today…

    • Admiral Chief Groot Wors

      Yep, agreed.

      *shuts down*

  • TechniKyle

    I laughed when I saw this the first time. I would buy and play the game for shits and giggles, but I highly doubt it would be a great game. This is unfortunately not what I want to see if game making elves were to make a lead character gay. While not a lead character, a certain gay character in The Last of Us, is a very good portrayal of a gay man. Not only is he shown as a real person, but a person that is capable of surviving in a world where everything has gone to hell. It shows that he is not only strong person, but a survivor and ultimately a character that I can be proud of seeing in video game.

    • Argentil

      The problem with the example you gave, is that he isn’t an example of what most gay men would find attractive. This Lawrence Croft is more of a sexual norm. What do you think the stud-muffins in the magazine Ellie found looked like? More like Lawrence than your example.

      • TechniKyle

        Sad and probably true, but the gaming industry needs to be above that. How many gay gamers do you know? I know two in person and three online. That’s not many considering I know a lot of people. I struggle to see how having an oversexed gay lead character will suddenly turn non-gay gamers to play video games. If that was true, then flocks of gay men would be playing Resident Evil 5 with the Chris in his gladiator skin. Are they? No. Why? They’re not interested in video games, so why cater for them? Cater for people who take video games seriously and cater to gay gamers who want to see an accurate, non-sexualised, portrayal of a gay lead or NPC character.

        • Argentil

          I only know 2 gaymers directly. You can’t say how many contacts you meet online are homosexual though. It’s not exactly something people say in limited conversation in the middle of an online match. My point is, I see nothing wrong with a game like this, if it were to materialise, and nobody should. Whether it’s practical or not, who cares? You will probably see a kickstarter for a game in future with a Gay protagonist.

        • Mikhil

          Personally, best use of a gay character in media, Agent Smeckler from Boondock Saints. You had no clue he was even gay until *that* scene.

      • James Little

        I’m gay and he does nothing for me, the femme boy look isn’t as popular as the media likes to think IMHO ???? besides, Nathan drake is already the gay tomb raider…????

  • Argentil

    Man, I feel like I was the only one who didn’t like the new Lara Croft. For the same reason I don’t like Superman. Her conflicts felt contrived, the torture porn was more of a negative than a character building endearment. She was just so bland,too capable and unrelateable.

  • Jim Lenoir (Banana Jim)

    Why is his shorts so small? It’s like he raided his rugby-loving dad’s tiny rugby shorts and made them even tinier… 😮

    BY the way, I recently read an article that said that women don’t really find their naked spouses sexually arousing. Apparently, it just doesn’t work that way.

    Now for lads, you just need to see a glimpse of side boob, or hint of upper leg, and the motor starts running. And, I’d imagine the same would be if you’re gay, just a glimpse of muscled chest or nut-busting thighs (and not those nuts.. dirty dirty minds) KABLOWW!!. But, research shows women are in fact wired differently.

    Which leads me to my question. Would a half-naked Lawrence Croft actually appeal to women?

    • Argentil

      Those shorts are quite similar to what the previous Laras were known for wearing. It’s an extreme example, but some of those poses seem sooo atypically Lara Croft, I had to laugh.

      • Jim Lenoir (Banana Jim)

        I think that dinosaur is in for a surprise…. GROIN ATTACK!!

  • OVG

    The very cold explorer is just looking for a good tomb to raid ;P

    • Skyblue

      somebody had to go there, it was always gonna happen… ;-p

      • RinceTheWhiskyWithIce

        And it was ALWAYS gonna be OVG 0-o

  • Jim Lenoir (Banana Jim)

    Come to think of it, that dude just needs a loin cloth and he could be… TARZAN CROFT!!

  • This is epic i got no words, i will just laugh my ass off, LOL!!! 😀

  • CaptainNemo42

    You sure that’s not just a younger Vladimir Putin?

    • Tauriq Moosa


  • Berretta

    Sodom and Gomorrah, enough said.

    “You shall not lie with a male as one lies with a female; it is an abomination.”

    • Lol really? You are actually offended by this?

      • Berretta

        OMW My borther is a real piece of SH*T, he always somes into my room and farks up my stuff. I did not post that stuff people. SIGH I’m going to go kill him……
        Sorry about this. He always drops me in it. I’m going to have to use Geoff’s post 🙂

        • Berretta

          How do I delete my douche brothers posts?…

          Found it

    • “Thou shalt not hate thy brother in thine heart: thou shalt in any wise rebuke [reason with] thy neighbour, and not suffer sin upon him. Thou shalt not avenge, nor bear any grudge against the children of thy people, but thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself: I am the Lord.”

      If you want to sling bible verses around, how about one that doesn’t spread hate.

      • Ultimo_Cleric N7

        ^^ Nice

      • Wtf101

        I think there is something missing from your title. Dominees…

      • ones that don’t… bad editor

    • Sageville

      Hey, did you just quote the bible?

    • Tauriq Moosa

      I need some advice from you regarding some other elements of God’s Laws and how to follow them.

      1. Leviticus 25:44 states that I may possess slaves, both male and
      female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend
      of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you
      clarify? Why can’t I own Canadians?

      2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in
      Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair
      price for her?

      3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in
      her period of menstrual uncleanliness – Lev.15: 19-24. The problem is
      how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.

      4. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a
      pleasing odor for the Lord – Lev.1:9. The problem is, my neighbors.
      They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

      5. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath.Exodus
      35:2. clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated
      to kill him myself, or should I ask the police to do it?

      6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an
      abomination – Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality.
      I don’t agree. Can you settle this? Are there ‘degrees’ of abomination?

      7. Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I
      have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses.
      Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle- room here?

      8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair
      around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev.
      19:27. How should they die?

      9. I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes
      me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

      10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev.19:19 by planting two
      different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments
      made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also
      tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to
      all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them?
      Lev.24:10-16. Couldn’t we just burn them to death at a private family
      affair, like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev.


      • Admiral Chief Groot Wors

        Just checking if you read the New Testament as well?

        • Tauriq Moosa

          Sure but S&G in Old and that’s apparently where our – now revealed – fake commenter quotes from.

          • Admiral Chief Groot Wors

            Just saying, taking something specific out of context can lead to a wrong assumption.

          • Tauriq Moosa


          • Admiral Chief Groot Wors

            Exactly. Cheese curl?

          • Tauriq Moosa


          • Admiral Chief Groot Wors


          • Wtf101

            Dear Admiral Chief Groot Wors: I applaud you on your skilful disarming of this topic. Cheese curls? Who would have thought? I am carrying a bag from this day forth, and doing my bit for religious tolerance…

          • Admiral Chief Groot Wors

            Let it be for thee , as you believe.

            No point in attacking each other or name calling or teabagging or what ever.

            Look, a squirrel!

          • Tauriq Moosa

            Also, internet comments are somewhat not conducive to most political/moral discussions. It’s why I don’t have them on my blog. Esp. when you frequently have the same kinds of debates (i.e. religious). If we could all learn to not arm them – or disarm them – we’d probably all be better. We should have them, but in person, face-to-face, or in civil, long-standing email discussions (or something actually conducive to engagement).

            Crap. I made another Internet comment!

          • I’ve never understood the point of having a blog with no comments.. I agree with news sites with no comments as you aren’t posting opinion you are posting facts.. but when posting an opinion with no ability for people to counter it.. well that’s more like preaching than discussing

          • Tauriq Moosa

            People have the entire Internet in which to disagree with me. And they do.

            (I have no control over comments – including those who attacked other commenters based on their sex/race/etc., too)

            I also provide contact details and update posts with rebuttals or criticisms.

            Have you seen the research on “the nasty factor” regarding how vitriolic Internet comments (which are like 99% of them) has a significant impact on how a reader engages with the original piece?

            And there’s no reason to think that the only people reading me already agree. Most don’t. Also, you could build up a network of commenters who are merely yes-men, too, so that’s also no guarantor that you’ll be having open engagement, either.

    • Ultimo_Cleric N7


      “Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you”

      “As far as it depends on you, try to live at peace with everyone”

      “Then Levi held a great banquet for Jesus at his house, and a large crowd of tax collectors and others were eating with them.”
      “Do not judge, lest ye be judged”

      Judging Non-Believers only alienates you from them. Take a page out of Jesus’ book and just chill. I also personally dont agree with it, but I am not calling down fire and brimstone on it either. Its not my place. And seriously, gay people are NOT the devil pal. They are just people.

      • Admiral Chief Groot Wors

        Well said

  • Berretta

    “You shall not lie with a male as one lies with a female; it is an abomination.”

    • Trevor Davies

      Exactly right, when a woman asks if those jeans make her look fat you lie & say no, if a man asks you lie & say yes. Completely different lies & therefore not abominable. Unlike the snowman, which is abominable.

      • Argentil

        Haha, indeed.

  • HAHA. Not safe for work I would say!

  • RinceTheWhiskyWithIce

    Oh wow… Who would want to play this? I have gay friends and not one of them would waste their time with something so contrived, they have taste.

    • Argentil

      Or so they say, haw-haw. Having been to a relative’s gaythering (I really wish I hadn’t been there), I will most definitely say that there are a lot of gay men who would appreciate this in-your-face sexuality. There are a LOT of women who would too, for that matter.

      • RinceTheWhiskyWithIce

        Good point. It’s the interweb, it’s 2013 and we have pregnant wrestling… This world is doomed!

        • Wtf101

          Wait. What? Pregnant wrestling? But… how…
          Runtime error 11: Division by zero

          • RinceTheWhiskyWithIce

            It was a challenge laid down from one brother to another.Challenge “yeah, and you can find pregnant wrestling” Challenged accepted, and achievement unlocked. #endisneigh

  • Koos

    Ohh lala! Sexy!

  • Sageville

    I think the design requirements were:

    Using the previous iterrations of Tomb Raider games, create a male character with comparative clothing.

    I mean lets be honest, the previous Tomb Raiders were sexualized, if the genders were reversed you would get Lawrence Croft, no mention of gay anywhere.

  • Alex Hicks

    Question. Apart from the poor clothing choices, why is it necessary to showcase the character walking with that ankle crossing gait – what certain societal elements would call “mincing”?

    My dad is gay; and neither he, nor his partner, walk by crossing their ankles. The physical attributes of a man make that sort of walk difficult and uncomfortable. Unless you’re dressed in drag and need to affect the walk to make your act more authentic …

  • brad coetzee

    I think its awesome, it would be completely hilarious if he was a full on queen. not one of those creepy “real man” homosexuals who could totes bum rape you if he really wanted. I find the “queens” to be extremely funny people.

  • Gideon Venter

    This made my day 8D

    There should be eye candy for everyone.

  • Goth_Nerd

    *cues YMCA*

  • Steve

    “Personally I’m pretty offended.. I know many gay people and the vast majority find this tasteless stereotype offensive and it in no way helps their cause in being accepted as equals in society.”

    Yeah women have to put up with this stereotyping all the time in video games and yet there are still some developers that seem to want to target 14 year old buys as their main audience.

    Do you feel offended seeing a female character’s arse hanging out their pants or their breasts being needlessly on display? Feel ashamed that you let media sell you half naked characters in games, whose looks undermine their actual skills or character.

  • James Little

    I actually assumed this was supposed to be a pisstake of how ridiculous female game characters looked by making guys wear the same kinda outfit ????

  • Random Dude

    I’m a straight guy, that being said, how many games are there based around sexy male pin-ups and straight up male objectification? None, and for that reason I’d buy a game like this in a heartbeat. An over-the-top sex-object of a man aimed at women who has to be told his handsome place by the competent female characters who surround him? Sold, I’d play that every day. Just imagine having to sneak through the drainage pipe at the olive oil factory, again, your character quietly sobbing, on your way to see your boss to help her find the man in the little boat for the third time. It’d be the best gaming experience of all time, because it would be something to break up the monotony of another FPS or more of the same tiresome gaming clichés.

  • Nathan Henderson

    Hi, actual queer man here. You grossly missed the point. Lawrence isn’t a stereotype of gay men – he’s a representation of what video games would be like if gay male gaze was catered to the way straight male gaze was. i.e. He’s there to show how ridiculous it is the way female characters are presented all the time in video games. And he shows that the “buff superhero” dudes that are often pointed to as the same thing aren’t actually sexual objectification (they’re power fantasies), by showing what actual male sexual objectification would look like.

    If it makes you uncomfortable – welcome to the background radiation of women’s lives.

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