Home Gaming Nintendo’s Satoru Iwata back at work,possibly immortal

Nintendo’s Satoru Iwata back at work,possibly immortal

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17

There-can-be-only-Wan

Say what you like about Nintendo, but they may be home to some of the hardest workers on the planet, an ethos that extends to the upper echelons of its management. Take for instance, head banana Satoru Iwata. The Nintendo chief executive had to excuse himself a short while ago in order to have some necessary surgery to remove a bile duct tumour. Surgery which he apologised for, as he felt bad about it making him unavailable to Nintendo and its consumers. But he’s feeling much better!

Back at work after his June surgery, Iwata has resumed his regular day to day duties according to Reuters. The Nintendo boss has been under tremendous pressure as of late, due to the Wii U struggling to find any relevance as of late. Despite some truly fantastic games being released for it this holiday season. On the lighter side of things however, those games are indeed having an impact on Nintendo sales. The company has made a quarterly profit, and Wii U sales are slowly picking up.

As for Iwata, he explained that he happens to be feeling much better and a bit lighter as well. Iwata then excused himself as he proceeded to pull out a ceremonial sword that he used to behead a co-worker and absorb his quickening, before joining an oddly-dressed Sean Connery on the beach for some fun on the sand.*

 

 

*That’s a complete lie, but it would have been cool if it did happen.

Last Updated: October 30, 2014

17 Comments

  1. LOL header is gold!

    Reply

    • Admiral Chief 0

      October 30, 2014 at 15:05

      Also those last two lines! MAGIC

      Reply

  2. Admiral Chief 0

    October 30, 2014 at 15:05

    Should we use the sword here too?

    Reply

    • Kensei Seraph Forget Terra

      October 30, 2014 at 15:11

      Your eyes would melt long before you got within striking range.

      Reply

  3. Admiral Chief 0

    October 30, 2014 at 15:05

    Oh man, just as I thought I had some good lulz in this article, DAT ALT TEXT

    Reply

  4. Matewis Jubilai

    October 30, 2014 at 15:08

    If I’m not mistaken, braveheart dies at the end…

    Reply

    • Admiral Chief 0

      October 30, 2014 at 15:09

      I think you have your movies mixed up in this case 😛

      Reply

      • Matewis Jubilai

        October 30, 2014 at 15:13

        🙂 The problem is that I don’t think I have ever seen the beginning of Highlander

        Reply

        • Admiral Chief 0

          October 30, 2014 at 15:15

          Doesn’t matter, because IN THE END THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!

          Reply

          • ReaperOfSquirrels

            October 30, 2014 at 15:25

            Since Star Wars I always see and hear that as “IN THE END THERE CAN BE OBI WAN!”

            Makes no sense, but there you go.

          • Admiral Chief 0

            October 30, 2014 at 15:36

            Heh, makes sense to me 🙂

        • Skyblue

          October 31, 2014 at 10:53

          YOH! Remedy that bud.

          Reply

  5. Rock789

    October 30, 2014 at 15:33

    “Iwata then excused himself as he proceeded to pull out a ceremonial
    sword that he used to behead a co-worker and absorb his quickening,
    before joining an oddly-dressed Sean Connery on the beach for some fun
    on the sand.”

    LOL! 🙂 Brilliant!!

    Reply

    • Admiral Chief 0

      October 30, 2014 at 15:37

      Yeah, so damn awesome

      Reply

  6. Nintenjoe82

    October 30, 2014 at 16:02

    Hopefully the tumour was causing the poor sales

    Reply

  7. J_Joestar

    October 30, 2014 at 16:41

    wouldn’t be surprised, have you seen comparison pics of Sakurai back in the day vs now? if anything the guy looks a few years younger.

    Reply

  8. Skyblue

    October 31, 2014 at 10:51

    That article title is legend!

    Reply

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