There are far too many members of the Critical Hit team who not just obligingly eat, but actually love KFC’s wings. Not just the regular zinger ones either, but those horrible ones that are drowning in a sticky brown, sugar goop that should be illegal under the Geneva convention. Darryn, Allesandro and erstwhile cabbage Matthew are all members of the self-proclaimed Dunked Knights, a group of people without any taste who willingly pay for and eat KFC’s dunked wings.
They’re an abomination, and that sauce that’s meant to be a ginger and soy concoction is probably three ingredients away from being napalm. I look down upon them because if there’s any local fast-food chicken wing that’s okay to it, it’s Chicken Licken’s Hot Wings – a vastly superior, slightly salty, but utterly addictive deep-fried poultry snack. That hot wings craving…when it’s got you, it’s got you.
Meanwhile, the only thing that Dunked wings have you crave is the toilet. What say you? Which chicken wing is superior? Zinger Wings? Their gross dunked variant? Hot Wings? Or are you like some other people in the office who think that chicken wings are a waste to begin with; little bits of oily chicken scraps that aren’t even worth bothering with?
The views and opinions expressed in this article are those of the author(s) and do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of Critical Hit as an organisation.
Last Updated: July 20, 2018
PoisonedBelial
July 20, 2018 at 11:13
How is this even a debate when you can have pizza instead?
Romans Pizza for the win – EVERYTIME.
Gr8_Balls_o_Fire
July 20, 2018 at 11:15
No. Gluten free vegan salad wins all the time.
PoisonedBelial
July 20, 2018 at 11:17
“Gluten free vegan salad”
I think the word you are looking for there is “sand”
Gr8_Balls_o_Fire
July 20, 2018 at 13:18
I think sand tastes better.
Geoffrey Tim
July 20, 2018 at 11:15
Just no. No. Romans is an abomination.
Gr8_Balls_o_Fire
July 20, 2018 at 11:16
Bite your tongue!
Geoffrey Tim
July 20, 2018 at 13:17
I’d rather bite my tongue than bite into a roman”s pizza. Blegghh
Gr8_Balls_o_Fire
July 20, 2018 at 13:18
lol you guys got me there
Captain JJ
July 20, 2018 at 13:18
Me too. But my own tongue. Might be weird otherwise.
Original Heretic
July 20, 2018 at 13:32
So kissing you tastes better than Romans pizza?
https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/34d7d8cb7c3097e4bcd0a341afb4895fd7020aa81e0845b83c957eac05e42758.gif
Geoffrey Tim
July 20, 2018 at 13:33
NO DOUBT
Original Heretic
July 20, 2018 at 13:54
https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/6ab321d8ff7de2c6a855d8111b61034473a29e7270f318fc3d05f348333a3b99.gif
Admiral Chief
July 20, 2018 at 16:33
I can confirm this
Alien Emperor Trevor
July 20, 2018 at 13:17
He did. It tasted better than Roman’s Pizza.
PoisonedBelial
July 20, 2018 at 13:18
HERESY!
Original Heretic
July 20, 2018 at 11:22
I’ve seen you say something similar before.
Please sate my curiosity: is there a pizza place that you actually LIKE?!
Gr8_Balls_o_Fire
July 20, 2018 at 13:24
Yea. Darren’s house.
Geoffrey Tim
July 20, 2018 at 13:24
Plenty. I love pizza – but I hate trashy, shitty franchise conveyor belt pizza.
Gr8_Balls_o_Fire
July 20, 2018 at 13:25
Are you a pizza snob?
Geoffrey Tim
July 20, 2018 at 16:27
No, I just like pizza that doesn’t look or taste like shit with shitty texture
Captain JJ
July 20, 2018 at 16:28
And not with 500 toppings.
Gr8_Balls_o_Fire
July 20, 2018 at 16:29
Agree on that
Geoffrey Tim
July 20, 2018 at 16:29
100%
PoisonedBelial
July 20, 2018 at 16:30
As long as the abomination known as pineapple is not on there, it’s all good.
Gr8_Balls_o_Fire
July 20, 2018 at 17:32
And fish
PoisonedBelial
July 20, 2018 at 17:33
Would rather have fish than pineapple.
Original Heretic
July 20, 2018 at 17:34
There’s a place in PE that does a “Vrystaater” pizza.
Boerewors and potato.
https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/f717a781fa3ce3ac343fcd94a48039ebc75342d34e5e07e55da24bb2dcd0d9aa.gif
Geoffrey Tim
July 20, 2018 at 17:34
Anchovies on a pizza are good – when it’s a good pizza
Captain JJ
July 20, 2018 at 23:36
and real anchovy
But that’s personally my favourite pizza.
Gr8_Balls_o_Fire
July 20, 2018 at 16:28
But they all look the same?
Original Heretic
July 20, 2018 at 16:29
That’s racist.
Gr8_Balls_o_Fire
July 20, 2018 at 16:30
I’m a pizzist. And Geoff
Gr8_Balls_o_Fire
July 20, 2018 at 16:30
I’m a pizzist. And Geoff
Geoffrey Tim
July 20, 2018 at 16:29
so, I get pizza from a few places around jhb; The Coalition, La Piovra, Ottimo, Gema. If I HAVE TO, HAVE TO have franchise pizza then Piza e Vino and Hello tomato are alright.
Original Heretic
July 20, 2018 at 16:33
PE has none of those.
We are somewhat deprived.
Captain JJ
July 20, 2018 at 16:35
Ottimo Gema – proof that anything can sound fancy in Italian. Like ‘Col Cacchio. XD
Geoffrey Tim
July 20, 2018 at 16:38
was meant to have a comma there…they’re two places 😀
Captain JJ
July 20, 2018 at 16:39
Oh. That makes Ottimo even MORE creative of a name XD
Let’s call the place “great” shall we.
Original Heretic
July 20, 2018 at 13:25
So you like pizza from….where exactly?
Captain JJ
July 20, 2018 at 13:25
Home made is the best. BUT, I have no hangups with American style pizza. It’s a different kind of food entirely, so you can’t compare it with real pizza. But American style pizza is more of a drunk food.
RinceThis
July 20, 2018 at 13:32
they call them pies? That’s enough to explain their version thanks!
Captain JJ
July 20, 2018 at 16:32
That’s why it’s drunk food.
RinceThis
July 20, 2018 at 16:33
as in, the idiots who came up with it were drunk? lol
Original Heretic
July 20, 2018 at 16:27
You just described American food in general.
Captain JJ
July 20, 2018 at 11:15
No
For the Emperor!
July 20, 2018 at 11:20
Romans Pizza in George is pathetic, just saying…
PoisonedBelial
July 20, 2018 at 11:21
Still better than Debonairs or Butlers.
Captain JJ
July 20, 2018 at 11:22
Never had Butlers, but Debos is by far the worst franchise pizza.
For the Emperor!
July 20, 2018 at 11:24
Don’t know Butlers…but I might prefer the Debonairs in George to the Romans, though I dislike Debonairs in general. Right now here in George I am sentenced to eating Panarotis 🙁 At least they have a nice Bar One Milkshake 🙂
Kervyn Cloete
July 20, 2018 at 14:13
From my experience, Butlers is by far the best of the convection oven “fast food” pizza places.
Captain JJ
July 20, 2018 at 11:15
Here it is……. I’ve never had either! o/
Hammersteyn
July 20, 2018 at 11:47
But how?
Alien Emperor Trevor
July 20, 2018 at 11:16
Trick question. Wings are a shit waste of time, money & effort.
Hammersteyn
July 20, 2018 at 11:47
I usually order them instead of fries.
RinceThis
July 20, 2018 at 11:27
get in the sea
Captain JJ
July 20, 2018 at 11:28
I agree. Fish is better.
Pariah
July 20, 2018 at 12:49
Winner!
The D
July 20, 2018 at 11:17
DUNK KNIGHTS, ASSEMBLE! https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/bc96c0bff1af2e051446d3179214b8e4ced63e638318ab2196061ac33ba14cb7.jpg
Hammersteyn
July 20, 2018 at 11:47
That shell he’s holding is tastier than dunked wings.
PoisonedBelial
July 20, 2018 at 11:18
Better to dunk wings than anything else.
Dunking biscuits or rusks etc is heresy.
Captain JJ
July 20, 2018 at 11:19
Except if it’s in someone else’s coffee and you don’t have to deal with that gunk in the bottom XD No, even then. It is heresy.
Gr8_Balls_o_Fire
July 20, 2018 at 13:19
Nooo biscuits are made for dunking!! And cake.
PoisonedBelial
July 20, 2018 at 13:20
SIES
Gr8_Balls_o_Fire
July 20, 2018 at 16:22
SIES your face
PoisonedBelial
July 20, 2018 at 16:23
At least my face looks better than a mushy dunked biscuit… xD
Gr8_Balls_o_Fire
July 20, 2018 at 16:23
But it doesn’t taste better
Captain JJ
July 20, 2018 at 17:25
I’m not willing to lick his face to find out…but I might disagree anyway.
Gr8_Balls_o_Fire
July 20, 2018 at 17:27
I did. It was like a nightmare. I immediately said SIES YOUR FACE
PoisonedBelial
July 20, 2018 at 23:27
Wow. :O
Gr8_Balls_o_Fire
July 21, 2018 at 06:28
Tasted like poison
PoisonedBelial
July 21, 2018 at 06:29
MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
Captain JJ
July 21, 2018 at 06:29
Wow, so it’s nearly just as bad as dunking! o/
Gr8_Balls_o_Fire
July 21, 2018 at 06:31
Where do you think “teabagging” came from?
PoisonedBelial
July 20, 2018 at 17:25
That’s not what *insert random here* said last night. 😛
Gr8_Balls_o_Fire
July 20, 2018 at 17:27
Yea but that’s what I said 😛
PoisonedBelial
July 20, 2018 at 23:27
Well, it couldn’t have been good coz I don’t remember anything 😛
Gr8_Balls_o_Fire
July 20, 2018 at 23:28
I’ve never claimed to be good. You need to raise your standards
PoisonedBelial
July 20, 2018 at 23:29
I… Well…
You got me there.
Gr8_Balls_o_Fire
July 21, 2018 at 06:31
Hahahaha good run though
Original Heretic
July 20, 2018 at 11:33
Dunk wings are so gross.
Pretty much on par with that Hong Kong Chicken abomination.
Brendyn Zachary
July 20, 2018 at 11:19
Dunked/Zinger wings have their place… in the trash.
Geoffrey Tim
July 20, 2018 at 11:20
MY MANNNNNNNNNN!
For the Emperor!
July 20, 2018 at 11:19
I am with you on the Dunked Wings abominations! I would take Zinger Wings though, since I do not like Chicken Licken overall and will not go just for wings I have not yet tasted.
Gr8_Balls_o_Fire
July 20, 2018 at 11:21
There’s something inherently wrong with all of Chicken Licken’s recipes.
HvR
July 20, 2018 at 12:07
They do vary widely from nice fresh and crispy to dodgy small Chinese takeaway in the backalley food
Original Heretic
July 20, 2018 at 11:24
Tried dunked wings once. Regretted it after one bite. NEVER AGAIN, I tell you. Disgusting shit.
Zinger wings, far more acceptable.
Cannot comment on the Chicken Licken stuff, never tried it (haven’t got one of those even remotely close to where I live).
Skittle
July 20, 2018 at 11:24
Without a doubt – Chicken Licken
Gr8_Balls_o_Fire
July 20, 2018 at 11:27
Hoo boy. You’re in for a long day
kieker
July 20, 2018 at 11:27
Dunked wings is delicious, but hella’ expensive these days. Haven’t had Chicken Licken in ages, as I don’t have one near me, and have at least 2 KFC’s almost within walking distance.
Kromas
July 20, 2018 at 11:27
Trick question. Everyone knows the streetwise chow was the best. I wish they were still made.
Admiral Chief
July 20, 2018 at 11:28
Nou pra jy!
HvR
July 20, 2018 at 12:20
Tried making my own last year by buying chicken strips, some of their square rolls and gravy.
But they seem to ship in the rolls now from the otherside of the Sahara so they are dry and stale AF
Jiggy
July 20, 2018 at 11:28
KFC zinger wings wins by a mile just for the reason that any Chicken Licken can only be found in the most dodgiest parts of a town or city. I much rather have a so claimed less tasty zinger wing instead of “the best” hot wing with a knife stuck in my neck.
Any form of dunked wings though absolutely sucks.
Admiral Chief
July 20, 2018 at 11:28
Mouth = KFC
Head = KFC
Heart = KFC
Stomach = CL
Butt = CL
Admiral Chief
July 20, 2018 at 11:29
The best wings are made by the Admiral in his kitchen
WhiteRock
July 20, 2018 at 11:32
Chicken Licken’s Hot Wings for me are better by far – went up to Jo’burg recently and stopped into a Chicken Licken just for them. However, have you seen the size of KFC’s Zinger Wings these days – no longer tiny bits of nothing – must be all the hormones and Steroids them chickens are on…
Admiral Chief
July 20, 2018 at 11:33
Agreed, I refuse to have KFC.
Had Popeyes the other day, that was really good actually!
WhiteRock
July 20, 2018 at 13:57
Haven’t had Popeyes – Will give them a try. With the water shortage in the WC, I’m avoiding fast food joints for now… 😉
HvR
July 20, 2018 at 13:28
What did the KFC chicken say to Chicken Licken chicken?
“Do you even lift bru?”
Admiral Chief
July 20, 2018 at 11:33
POPEYES CHICKEN!!!
Debate over
RinceThis
July 20, 2018 at 11:34
How about Spurs wings?
Hammersteyn
July 20, 2018 at 11:47
How about you stay in France.
Original Heretic
July 20, 2018 at 13:35
Oh, go eat a frog.
RinceThis
July 20, 2018 at 13:37
https://media.giphy.com/media/Bt5Hi6X0nKcW4/giphy.gif
Original Heretic
July 20, 2018 at 16:38
Now go do that with acid.
Admiral Chief
July 20, 2018 at 13:35
Durky durky
Depends on the Spur I guess, some Spurs should be avoided at all cost
Original Heretic
July 20, 2018 at 13:50
“Some”?!?
ALL!!
There was a Spur just down the road from where I live. Used to go there at least one a month, only because of their play area. My little boy loves playing with his cousins in there.
About a year ago, they dropped the Spur name, but kept their internal layout very much the same.
First time going there, we saw an immediate improvement to the food AND the prices.
miaau
July 20, 2018 at 15:09
Yeah, prices…… bloody hell.
As someone who has been, for a while now, not on a full salary, I get that.
Captain JJ
July 20, 2018 at 13:35
Spurs are still a thing?
HvR
July 20, 2018 at 11:47
Chicken Licken is very hit and miss depending on the branch, some of them you can see the wings have muffing in varnished oil for 3 days.
KFC normal zinger isn;t too bad, dunked ones are horrible.
Prefer making my own though.
Split the wings, coat in flour and salt, chuck them in the air fryer for few minutes.
Melt margarine (because nobody can afford butter anymore) and my favourite hot sauce of the week.
Wings in sauce, piping hot served with Knor Blue Cheese Salad dressing.
Gavin Mannion
July 20, 2018 at 12:00
This is how the kids now days do it right?
1. It’s Impossible
2. To Rank
3. Chicken
4. Wings
5. As Everywhere
6. Has
7. Their
8. Own
9. Style
10. KFC Dunked Wings
Matthew Figueira
July 20, 2018 at 12:03
Yesssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss
Admiral Chief
July 20, 2018 at 12:10
you start at 10 and work down, 5/7 for effort though
Gavin Mannion
July 20, 2018 at 12:13
I tried… for clarity to others… KFC Dunked Wings are disgusting
Original Heretic
July 20, 2018 at 12:02
Why did this article have to appear so close to lunch?!?!
gawd, I’m going to spend WAAAY too much money on food right now….
Matthew Figueira
July 20, 2018 at 12:03
Omg I got a shout out. DUNKED KNIGHTS UNITE!
HvR
July 20, 2018 at 12:08
Well you are probably used to having hair in your food so not surprised
Magoo
July 20, 2018 at 12:49
https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/a771785e04b0cef3329e61e4f87f650ab9ac9d44486094b13396fcdfb3fa1baf.gif
Matthew Figueira
July 23, 2018 at 15:18
XD
BradeLunner
July 20, 2018 at 12:27
Noooooooooooo! I’m living abroad now and only coming home to visit in December! Now I’ve got the chicken licken cravings
Gavin Mannion
July 20, 2018 at 12:33
I’ve been dying for a Rocomamas burger for over a month now-… nothing around me is anything like it
BradeLunner
July 20, 2018 at 12:49
The South African pallet is a very unique one, my wife was a large scale spice buyer and compared to other countries South African´s grade is a much stronger almost burnt flavour. Makes sense to me
Gavin Mannion
July 20, 2018 at 13:14
yeah in Europe I’m seriously struggling to find anything really spicy etc.. everything is so bland
miaau
July 20, 2018 at 13:17
you mean the everyday sort of foods, not got flavour?
Sigh. that sucks
I know mainland Europe likes to tease the English for the blandness (boiling?) of their food.
Gavin Mannion
July 20, 2018 at 13:32
yeah so far in Belgium, France and Spain I’m finding the average food to be extremely bland. Cheese is amazing, top class food is also brilliant but standard food, chips etc is terrible
miaau
July 20, 2018 at 13:36
Cheese, I get and that is great to find.
Shattered my illusion of, especially, France and Spain, having this exciting, fresh, tasty food at sidewalk cafes and all that. Somehow, by watching cooking shows, I thought their food would be awesome.
So, do you guys try cooking as well? Ingredients and so on hard to come by that you are used to or not?
Gavin Mannion
July 20, 2018 at 14:03
yeah we mainly cook at home. In Spain it was impossible to find fresh chilli, steak or quite a few of the spices we find normal in SA. Their seafood is amazing though
In Belgium now and finding steak reasonably priced but again no chillies really and nowhere in Europe seems to have Salt and Vinegar chips
BradeLunner
July 20, 2018 at 14:01
I’m living in Spain, and I asked for extra spicy chicken, they added extra black pepper! I’m from Durban so you can imagine
Gavin Mannion
July 20, 2018 at 14:03
LOL… I went out for curry at a tourist spot and told the guy make my Vindaloo hot, not Spanish hot but English hot… it came mild. So depressing
BradeLunner
July 20, 2018 at 14:08
My solution was to find the Pakistanis; they have decent green chillies, cheap acceptable haircuts (I’m not paying 23 Euros for a cut) and they are literally all over the world.
Gavin Mannion
July 20, 2018 at 14:18
Last place I was in a tiny tourist town, now closer to a city so I am more hopeful I will find things
miaau
July 20, 2018 at 13:07
They are…. a different restaurant and I love it. High quality of ingredients, well prepared food. Clever ideas behind the creation of the franchise. And I believe you get, on the burgers, a great bang for buck, looking at the quality of the ingredients.
AND blocks for the kids to play with at table!
Kenn Gibson
July 20, 2018 at 12:54
dunked wings
miaau
July 20, 2018 at 13:07
I love this topic.
Also, never actually enjoyed EITHER, so….. My 4.5 year old thinks that pops are cool. That is about as far as I can go in this debate.
Um. yeah. Not even 2 cents really.
G8crasha
July 20, 2018 at 14:50
A groundbreaking debate that I will happily participate in! My answer: Neither! I could not be bothered picking at bones! As @disqus_DoEH3TsffU:disqus said: waste of time, money and effort! Breasts all the way!
Tbone187
July 23, 2018 at 10:16
No contest. CL all day. With their vinegar and chilli powder sauce effort they use. Dunked wings had it’s place on occasion I suppose.
Geoffrey Tim
July 23, 2018 at 11:12
That occasion being when the brooklax or surge fails to work and you need something stronger.