How much would it cost? The ultimate gaming setup

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So you’ve just struck gold with the Powerball jackpot, or you’ve sold your organs to a wealthy German business person, or maybe the SANBS has finally started paying for a pint of that crimson oil running through your veins. The point is, you’ve got cash, lots of it, and you want to spend it.

You could probably invest it, securing your future for the long-term, or maybe even give some to charity, seeing as it is that time of the year. Or you could blow as much of it as possible on what could be the worlds most legendary gaming setup. So how much would it cost in the end?

The consoles

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First off, you’re going to need a fancy new gaming platform, and with all that cash at your disposal, you’re going to have access to all the next gen hardware that you desire. Right now, consoles are as cheap as they’re ever going to be, with manufacturers having reduced prices substantially in recent months.

There are plenty of bundles out there, with new games attached to the machines for a few extra bucks, but for now, lets just focus on the hardware alone. On average, expect to pay around R2900 each for a 250gig Xbox 360 and 160gig PS3 console, with a Nintendo Wii costing around R1600 when on special.

Next, we’re going to need two sets of HDMI cables for those bad boys, because nothing beats playing a game at a resolution of 1080P. HDMI cables will set a person back around a R100 nowadays, so lets get two of those so that we don’t have to struggle with changing them every time we want to swop platforms.

Total: R7600

Accessories

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If this generation of consoles is going to be remembered for anything, it will be for the tons of accessories that came with them after the devices launched. For starters, you’re going to want an extra controller for each of your devices, so you’ll be looking at around for one of the newer Xbox 360 controllers, which has a much better D-pad for about R500, while an extra PS3 controller will cost about R600.

An extra Wii Mote and Nunchuck controller will cost you around R700 for the set.

Next, we’re going to want some of those fancy new motion sensing devices that Microsoft and Sony have been so desperate to sell to us, so lets get a PS3 Move and Navigation set for just under R900.

Microsoft doesn’t have a motion sensing-controller, but it does have the Kinect, which translates a users body into a digital controller. The average price on one of these is around R1999.

Total: R4699

The Display

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The heart of the swarm, so to speak. If you’re going to show off all the HD visuals of your brand spanking new consoles, then you’re going to want the biggest and best TV possible. Flat screen TV’s are a necessity, and nothing beats a good LCD or LED box for those future gaming moments.

Nothing but the best brand will do for this, and speaking out of personal experience, I’d recommend going with a Samsung TV. For R63 000, you can buy a massive 65 inch LED TV that will leave your friends and neighbours to make the obligatory compensation joke, but screw them, because at least this bad boy comes with a built in 3D feature.

All the usual bells and whistles are included with this TV, such as a sharp picture, internet capabilities, while still being supermodel thin. And besides, who wouldn’t want to have a TV that can be seen from outer space?

Total: R63 000

The Sound

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Its not enough for everyone to just be directly blinded by the sheer brilliance of your TV every time they walk past, you’re going to need to deafen those peasants as well with a good dose of Dolby.

SONY makes an excellent range of equipment to suit the needs of even the most stringent audiophile, and their DDW5400 features enough surround sound to violently assault your neighbours ear-drums with. Its stylish, sleek and sophisticated, costs R7999 and will make cops think that an actual crime is in progress whenever you boot up a copy of Grand Theft Auto.

Of course, you’re going to want to immerse yourself a bit more deeply for certain games, and what could be better than a good set of headphones? The market is positively crawling with these devices now, and every manufacturer worth their salt now makes a headset.

We’ve even got celebrities in on the act, with people such as Dr Dre now claiming that theirs is the best. Gamers however, are a fickle and superstitious lot, and the community has been quite supportive of the Logitech G35 headset for quite some time now.

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They’re a comfy, massive and technologically advanced, and you can pick one up for around R1100.

Total: R9099

The Throne

m750 massage chair

Arguably the most important thing in the room, this is where you’re going to plonk your ass for hours on end, so only the best will do. After the twentieth consecutive hour playing Skyrim, chances are good that your muscles will begin to atrophy, so you’re going to need a chair that’s not only comfy, but jiggly as well.

Massage chairs are the best bet, and they’ve recently come into fashion as well. The best ones feature leather, blood pressure monitors and enough vibrating modes that they measure on the Richter scale.

While there are plenty of cheap variants available, only the best will do, so prepare to pay around R50 000 for the M750 Ultimate Massage Recliner Chair. Its even got arm-bags on the side in order to create a more comfortable experience for us shorter gamers, or to use as an impromptu form of restraint when you have to show the missus just how awesome Saints Row 3 is.

Total: R50 000

Drinks

Because we sure as hell are not going to get up to go all the way to the fridge to get a refreshing drink. Defy makes a great little container to keep all your favourite drinks in the big chill, and you can pick one up for R1800.

Total: R1800

Clothing

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Lets be honest here, you’re probably going to develop the social skills of an autistic sloth at this point, and you might as well be pissing in the wind before you start wearing those restrictive garments again.

Still, nothing beats a good old dressing gown, and Woolworths has some really warm and luxurious robes for R200. Besides, eventually, you’re going to have to answer that doorbell, and robes have always been the preferred clothing of choice for those of us in a hurry. Just ask Arthur Dent.

Total: R200

Deodorant

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Seriously, you kind of smell…funky. Spray yourself with some Axe deodorant already to mask that horrible odour.

Total: R20

And there you have it, everything you need in order to create an unforgettable summer of gaming. Forget about loved ones, sunshine or good health, and concentrate on playing those games!

Grand Total: R136 418

Last Updated: October 11, 2011

Darryn Bonthuys

Something wrong gentlemen? You come here prepared to read the words of a madman, and instead found a lunatic obsessed with comics, Batman and Raul Julia's M Bison performance in the 1994 Street Fighter movie? Fine! Keep your bio! In fact, now might be a good time to pray to it!

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