Your mother's ass you bugger

I’ve played a lot of games. I was there when Crackdown made me hunt for orbs. I played as the last Dante in Devil May Cry 4. I drove with titans in Project Gotham Racing 4. I unlocked the secrets of Fist of the North Star, knowledge that must never be revealed. But try as I might, I can’t not suck at a game of FIFA. because SPERTS!

 Here’s videographic proof of just how bad I am at FIFA 14. Right now, I can’t even tell which team I’m on, because I’m too busy shouting SHORYUKEN every time I try to tackle someone. And what is this offsides nonsense? And why is my goalie on the other side of the screen after half time?

THIS GAME MAKES NO SENSE?!

Last Updated: September 12, 2013

Summary
1.1
was reviewed on PC

Darryn Bonthuys

Something wrong gentlemen? You come here prepared to read the words of a madman, and instead found a lunatic obsessed with comics, Batman and Raul Julia's M Bison performance in the 1994 Street Fighter movie? Fine! Keep your bio! In fact, now might be a good time to pray to it!

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