The 8 most America (Fuck Yeah!) video games ever made

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America-games

It’s (hopefully still) the fourth of July when you read this, a day that is known around the world as America’s birthday. Or if you’re in Britain, Traitor’s Day. Fireworks! Freedom! MONSTER TRUCKS! For all the fun that we throw towards America and their WILD society, it’s hard to deny that we have a lot of love for the regular people across the pond. They’ve got a national pride that cannot be measured, they’re actually a friendly lot whose confidence is inspiring and they’re responsible for 97% of every inspiring speech in movies today.

So with that in mind, here’s a look at several games from years past, that made me want to pump my fist into the air and yell America fuck yeah!

Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance

Metal Gear Rising Revengeance

Also known as the greatest video game ever made now and forever, Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance may hail from the land of the rising sun but it’s about as American as horribly complex politics when you really look at it. A critique of the American war machine as told through the eyes of a patriotic super-soldier cyborg who has been cybernetically augmented to the point where he can cleave skyscrapers in half, Revengeance dials up the AMERICA by pitting you against the greatest villain that the land of the free could possibly conjure up: A politician.

Armed with nanite-infused power, rhetoric and a speech that plans to transform America into a land of the truly free, Metal Gear Rising Revengeance will have you sweating red, blue and white by the time the end credits roll.

Broforce

broforce-listing-thumb-01-ps4-us-15jan16

I like to imagine that American pop culture defined our lives. Those warm afternoons, spent watching VHS tapes of the greatest heroes of a bygone era: Rambo, the Terminator from the second film onwards and John McClane just to name a few. Broforce is an unashamed tribute to action, a digital shrine to the action stars who marched through a box office and cemented a legacy within the walls of those cinemas that showed off their exploits.

Cunningly disguising those iconic characters lest the American pastime of suing the pants off of you for intellectual property infringement shows up, Broforce is still a delightful blast from the past that’ll have you checking your local video rental shop to see if you can still rent five older patriotastic movies for a week once you’re done playing. A game with all the subtlety of a hamburger food fight at a vegan rally, Broforce wears its machismo proudly on its ripped sleeves that can barely contain the bugling biceps within.

Command and Conquer: Red Alert 2

Command and Conquer Red Alert 2

True story: Ever since America was kicked out of Britain for being too cool and failing to play by the Queen of England police chief’s rules, other countries have wanted to topple their awesomeness. How do you even take down the raddest nation to ever exist in a fair fight? Answer: You don’t. In Command and Conquer’s glorious second Red Alert game, the only way to take down America was through the use of Russian Commie-psychics and a sneak attack of overwhelming firepower sprinkled with a dash of zeppelins on a bombing run.

Taken down by surprise, Red Alert 2 is the equivalent of Independence Day if the aliens had been replaced with an unlimited meat shield of Russian soldiers marching along to an admittedly sickass beat while attempting to tear down Lady Liberty. In true American fashion though, Red Alert 2 has you flexing the might of America’s war machine as you throw legions of soldiers into battle so that they can soak up bullets and protect the vastly more valuable tanks and jets on the battlefield.

You could play as Russia or any number of other countries that don’t swear allegiance to the stars and stripes, but in this case it’s better to be dead than red.

Ghost Recon Wildlands

Ghost Recon Wildlands

There’s no problem that cannot be solved without a little bit of American intervention, and you’d be hard-pressed to find a better example of American tourism than what is available in Ghost Recon Wildlands. It’s the beauty of Bolivia, ransacked by the evils of drug lords and gah socialism, leaving only you as a burly-bearded tourist with too many guns and cutting edge military tech to help save the day.

I mean sure, most of the cities you rampage through look just fine even when there’s a major drug cartel operating on their doorstep, but that’s all a front for an organisation which is using America’s hunger for nose candy to setup a vital economy after decades of sanctions and internationally-backed coups…right? Point is, if you want to save the day in a way that only America can, Ghost Recon Wildlands has you sorted.

Patriotic Pinball

Patriotic Pinball

Whether the wars they fought in were just or not, there’s no denying that America has lost a lot of soldiers in pursuit of freedom, democracy and access to new oilfields. Even when it was released in 2003, Patriotic Pinball came hot on the heels of wars that had claimed the lives of scores of soldiers in foreign nations. A death toll of the valiant, the noble and the legendary whose exploits could only be paid due diligence by the whirring BEEPS and BOOPS of a pinball stand that took itself very very seriously.

Score a million points for America lads, and don’t forget to type “USA” in the high score memorial section.

Metal Wolf Chaos

Metal Wolf Chaos

There used to be a time when the President of America wasn’t a man of flowery speech and constant scandals. He was an elected man of action, a communism wall-tearing-down-demander, an Iraqi-bombing symbol of democracy who led by example. Metal Wolf Chaos happens to be a game, a mad jaunt across America where one deposed president strikes back at the tea-drinking tyrants who ousted him out of office.

With liberty at stake and freedom in peril, there’s only one way that democracy can triumph in this bonkers game that never made it to the states: By giving the president a giant robot suit and watching him fly off to mech America great again. Channeling the inherited blood of none other than former president Woodrow Wilson, Metal Wolf Chaos is so American that it’s a wonder that the game disc didn’t sprout eagle wings after you were done with it and fly off to peck the eyes out of socialists.

Far Cry 5

Far Cry 5

You just cannot kill the American spirit of community, especially when said community happens to be facing a militia of well-armed zealots led by a charismatic doomsday prepper who happens to be feeding his flock all manner of mind-tripping drugs to transform them into a faithful army of maniacs. Far Cry 5 may not have taken any real sides thanks to Ubisoft preferring to French it out and stay neutral in an increasingly divided world, but it’s hard to deny just how effective this game was at rallying the troops and fighting back against tyranny.

America was a nation founded by rebels, and nothing smells more like rebellion than a sandbox that allows you to fight back against an iron-fisted redneck preacher deep in the heartland of America itself. Even if said fella actually turned out to be disastrously correct in his prediction of the end times.

Bad Dudes Vs. DragonNinja

Bad Dudes Vs. DragonNinja

Let me tell you something about Americans: Don’t ever get offended if they shout at you. This here is a nation with attitude, a country of natural-born showmen who know that if you ain’t first, you’re last. That idea of American exceptionalism takes the stage in Bad Dudes Vs. DragonNinja, a game that from the very first collection of screens asks nay demands to know if you’re bad enough to take down a horde of ninjas who have kidnapped the president.

The Secret Service is rubbish, shinobi warriors are everywhere and only patriotism can punch harder than ninja steel. Fun fact: The game was made by Data East but their logo obviously spells DC because DEMOCRACY! Now go save the president and grab a few hamburgers for the POTUS when you’re done.

Last Updated: July 4, 2019

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