In a major case of “oopsies!”, Microsoft has accidentally leaked the existence of Two Point Campus, a follow-up to last year’s excellent Two Point Hospital. As you’d already surmised, this game is all about higher learning and building a campus that can teach the youth of today to be the leaders of tomorrow or die trying. Possibly, death may be exaggerated in this instance but those final exams are brutal.
“Get to know your students, explore their personalities and fulfill their wants and needs. Craft buildings, choose courses, hire the best staff and build an academic institution to stand the test of time,” the blurb for the post reads on the page that TurinTur of Quarter to Three set up after Microsoft realised its blunder and Thanos-snapped the official listing into oblivion.
Not only are there a number of classes that you can set up for your students to take part in, they’re infinitely cooler and more relevant to society than my near-worthless degree in journalism. The joke is on you though, once I turn it into an NFT I’ll be rich. According to the game blurb, you’ll be able to tutor students in Knight School and salivatory Gastronomy, the latter of which is focused on making American-sized meals.
There’s naturally a whole bunch of other stuff to do in the background before you start pumping out giant pies, as you’ll have to do some admin quid pro quo to get the gears of tertiary education rolling, but if it’s anything like Two Point Hospital, expect a few spanners to be chucked in that direction as you take on the challenge of making education profitable.
There was no release date mentioned, but the game will be out on Xbox and PC via Steam. I’d wager that PlayStation will also be included, looking at the previous history of Two Point Hospital. If the game features a mode to make fun of the art campus kids, I’m all in. What are they going to do? Harness their inner pain to create beautiful works of art? I’d like to see them try that.
Last Updated: June 1, 2021