Home Entertainment Some dude flying-kicked Arnold Schwarzenegger and somehow didn’t die!

Some dude flying-kicked Arnold Schwarzenegger and somehow didn’t die!

1 min read

In a display that shocked the world, the man who kicked The Terminator is still alive without a single broken bone!


This past weekend, the ever-powerful and bodacious man himself, Arnold Schwarzenegger, was visiting the Sandton Convention Centre to promote the Arnold Classic Africa, a sporting event that gathered over 24,000 athletes to challenge one another in a series of competitions that probably involved many, many sweaty bodies. The man who boldly attacked Arnie dashed up behind him and launched a flying kick, stunning everyone by actually causing the action hero to slightly stumble. The video of the attack can be seen here:


After the incident, Schwarzenegger, a 71 year old body-builder, movie star, Californian governor and human flesh tower, said that he was mostly thankful that the “idiot hadn’t interrupted my Snapchat”. An uninterrupted Snapchat being a miracle in its’ own right, what is even more astonishing is that the kicker somehow didn’t break both of his legs. Arnie, who has had his titanium skeleton examined several times by both fictional and real-life doctors, is confirmed to have the ability to shatter mortal human bones with a simple flex of his triceps. His assailant, by all accounts, should resemble a strawberry jam, yet was seen being dragged away shouting, “Help me! I need a Lamborghini!”, whilst still moving his limbs unhindered.


It remains to be seen what kind of demigod can walk away from Schwarzenegger unharmed. Could this be the prophesised battle? The one foretold in the scriptures? The attempted assassination of Arnie? One can only hope this was not what the sages predicted, as the ruination of Arnold is destined to spell destruction for the rest of humankind.


May Arnold have mercy on our souls.

Last Updated: May 20, 2019


  1. Admiral Chief Flammenwerfer

    May 20, 2019 at 08:24

    Dafuq did I just read


    • Pariah

      May 20, 2019 at 08:25

      I honestly thought it was a Darryn article. It seems Brad has some funny bones of his own. Rad, Brad. 😀


    • For the Emperor!

      May 20, 2019 at 09:55

      Fan Fiction? 😛
      Was good stuff!


  2. G8crasha

    May 20, 2019 at 08:25

    Who in their right mind drop kick somebody they don’t personally know? I mean, regardless of the fact that it was The Terminator, what could would do so do? Is he trying to gain attention? Idiot!


  3. Gavin Mannion

    May 20, 2019 at 09:09

    Apparently Arnie will not press charges against the pissant, I for one wish he did. What sort of scumbag attacks a 71 year old man from behind for no reason. If you know the idiot who did this please give him a klap for me


    • RinceThis

      May 20, 2019 at 09:24

      Agreed. The little pissant is going to boast about this for years.


  4. CrAiGiSh

    May 20, 2019 at 09:39

    This moron, makes us all look like a fucking joke now …

    “South Africa … the home of the Fly Kicking People …”

    Jesus wept …


  5. SagatatiaRZA

    May 20, 2019 at 12:37

    The only reason he didn’t die is because he possessed all 5 additional Infinity chromosomes.


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