And your WWE 2K14 winners are…

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Dubya dubya eeee champ

LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING BROTHER! When it comes to winning prizes, most of you cash in a check, but ya can’t go the distance! Ya ain’t tough enough! Well we finally found a contender for the vacant prizes left over by the previous champ! Exclamation marks! And he is…

Congrats to our new undisputed champ Elhermo, for having the heart of a heel and enough promo-cutting charisma to get sued by Diamond Dallas Page for stealing his finishing move! Bam!

Lazygamer Community, while you sit at your desks, hopefully as uncomfortable as you can possibly be. I want you to listen to me. I want you to digest this because before I win all these awesome WWE2K14 prizes, I have a lot of things I want to get off my chest.

I don’t hate you, Lazygamers. I don’t even dislike you. I do like you. I like you a hell of a lot more than I like most people online.

I hate this idea that you’re the best gamers. Because you’re not. I’m the best. I’m the best in the world. There’s one thing you’re better than I am and that’s kissing Megarom’s a**.

You’re as good as kissing Megarom’s a** as John Cena or Hulk Hogan are at kissing Vince Mcmahon’s a**. I don’t know if you’re as good as Darryn Bonthuys. He’s a pretty good a** Kisser. Always was and still is.

I am the best WWE2K14 Player in the world.

I’ve been the best since the first day i picked up WWE12. And I’ve been vilified and hated since that day cause THQ saw something in me that nobody else wanted to admit. That’s right, I’m a THQ Guy. You know who else was a THQ Guy? Brock Lesnar. And he played WWE12 just like i did. The biggest difference between me and Brock is that i’m going to win all these prizes.

I’ve grabbed so many of Lazygamer’s brass rings that its finally dawned on me that they’re completely imaginary. The only thing that’s real is me and the fact that day in and day out, for almost 3 years, I have proved to everybody in the world that I am the best at WWE2k14, the best at create a wrestler, on imaginary commentary, at purchasing the DLC!! Nobody can touch me.

And yet no matter how many times I prove it, i’m not on your branded t-shirts. I don’t get profiled in an article on this site. I’m not anywhere, but the fact of the matter is I should be.

I am the BEST…IN…THE…WORLD.

We’ve still got more prizes to give away and exclamation marks to hand out though! Five of you mid-card brawlers win yourselves a shirt each. After elbow-dropping the randomiser, the list of those five winners have been revealed. And they are:

wwe random

Well done chaps. I’ll be in touch with y’all. A big thanks to Megarom for sponsoring the prizes after we put them in the walls of Jericho.

Last Updated: November 14, 2013

Darryn Bonthuys

Something wrong gentlemen? You come here prepared to read the words of a madman, and instead found a lunatic obsessed with comics, Batman and Raul Julia's M Bison performance in the 1994 Street Fighter movie? Fine! Keep your bio! In fact, now might be a good time to pray to it!

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