Cookies

Cookie Clicker should actually be called Cookie Heroin. I’ve been playing for days, and I can’t get enough. But to tell you why, well, that’s another story all together.

Cookie Clicker is a browser game, and you can go start playing here. Go on, click through, I dare you.

I found out about it because of twitter. I believe it was Notch who claimed it was his most fulfilling gaming experience in the last month, and I had to see more. I have to say, I play it constantly. In fact, I’m playing it right now.

Screen Shot 2013 09 26 at 1 29 41 PM

It all starts with that first click. You baked a cookie. Aw, that’s cute. You even get an achievement. Click click click. Now you can buy a cursor that will click for you every ten seconds. Oh, or a grandma that will bake cookies for you. That said, I couldn’t stop clicking at this point. Bake bake bake.

So what happens? Well, small comments pop up. Your cookies become popular and your corporation grows. Soon, you don’t need to click at all to be successful – you have grandmas and cursors and cookie farms for that. This is when the idle greed kicks in. Wander off to other websites with Cookie Clicker in the background – upon your return you can get new upgrades. Maybe be benevolent and give that cookie a few clicks. Okay, just one more.

Screen Shot 2013 09 26 at 1 32 50 PM

Eventually, the comments get a bit more disconcerting. Your cookie mines are causing earthquakes, and your cookie factories are forcing the elderly into slave labour. But, how can you stop? Even when my cookies became sentient, I had to keep clicking. I’m still clicking. Right now. I can’t stop. I think the cookies are taking over.

Screen Shot 2013 09 26 at 1 31 38 PM

Truly, Cookie Clicker is an addictive game that actually plays on your emotions and greed, while still being perfect for idle game play. I dare you to give it a try and not get hooked. And then come tell me what your CPS is – As I write this my CPS (Cookies per second, for those of you who aren’t playing) is 242,404,271.1; that’s right, millions of cookies per second. Also, my universe is full of cookies and I’m getting worried about restless grandmas. How about you?

Last Updated: September 26, 2013

1.1
was reviewed on PC

78 Comments

  1. Guest

    September 26, 2013 at 18:20

    Dammit Zoe. I hate you. I actually had some work to finish.
    PS: You owe me a new mouse πŸ˜‰

    Reply

    • Eben Haezer

      September 27, 2013 at 04:41

      I think I will bust my mouse until I download FastClicker.
      Enjoy 84 clicks/second!

      Reply

  2. bandit766

    September 26, 2013 at 20:12

    Fun game! Thanks Zoe πŸ™‚

    Reply

  3. Mariah

    September 27, 2013 at 00:10

    I just started maybe an hour ago and my current CPS right now is 2,179.8. Whoops I just bought a shipment now it’s 2,269.8. πŸ˜‰

    Reply

  4. Sir Rants-a-Lot Llew

    September 27, 2013 at 06:45

    No no no! This is going to be like that bloody candy game isn’t it? No no no. Not falling for this again. Will not give up my freedom like that again… Must…. resist…..

    Reply

    • Her Highness the Hipster

      September 27, 2013 at 07:37

      click. click. click

      Reply

      • Sir Rants-a-Lot Llew

        September 27, 2013 at 10:10

        STOP IT!

        Reply

      • Sir Rants-a-Lot Llew

        September 27, 2013 at 10:28

        Darnit. I started πŸ™

        Reply

    • Kermit Johnson

      December 23, 2013 at 07:09

      That candy game is 10x better than that stupid clicking game! Check out my review by searching Foodperson at YouTube.

      Reply

  5. Alien Emperor Trevor

    September 27, 2013 at 07:15

    No I’m not playing this. #foreverSP :/

    Reply

  6. Drew Thedaker

    September 27, 2013 at 07:25

    Just wait until the Grandmapocalypse…..

    Reply

  7. Hammersteyn

    September 27, 2013 at 07:32

    Started playing last night. Up to 8,300,000 at the moment. That frenzy cookie that increases production for 77 seconds is a big help.

    Reply

    • Her Highness the Hipster

      September 27, 2013 at 08:02

      i’ve got a golden coooookie!

      Reply

      • Hammersteyn

        September 27, 2013 at 08:10

        Sorry, you’re right it’s called golden cookies.

        Reply

  8. Methias

    September 27, 2013 at 07:33

    Just wait until you start spending trillions of cookies… its bad, so so bad

    Reply

  9. Hammersteyn

    September 27, 2013 at 07:45

    It’s like they turned the concept of bubble wrap into a game. The bakers man can!

    Reply

    • Umar Jaeger

      September 27, 2013 at 07:58

      Dude..Evil within Stream

      Reply

      • Hammersteyn

        September 27, 2013 at 08:25

        Watched a bit, didn’t want to see it all. This is gonna be awesome!

        Reply

        • Umar Jaeger

          September 27, 2013 at 08:26

          Lol looks damn awesome, I also stopped…CAN’T WAIT

          Reply

  10. Umar Jaeger

    September 27, 2013 at 07:50

    Damn you zoe

    Reply

  11. That Happy Twit

    September 27, 2013 at 07:54

    Oh snap, now I am playing it.

    Reply

    • Umar Jaeger

      September 27, 2013 at 07:54

      And you’re addicted just like me πŸ™

      Reply

      • That Happy Twit

        September 27, 2013 at 08:12

        Maybe I will leave the cookies going on my work PC over the weekend. :/

        Reply

  12. Emm

    September 27, 2013 at 08:00

    dammit Zoe #$%#$%@# how am I going to work now

    Reply

    • Her Highness the Hipster

      September 27, 2013 at 08:01

      it is work! you’re building an empire

      Reply

      • Alien Emperor Trevor

        September 27, 2013 at 08:05

        That’s not how you do it. It’s by crushing your enemies, seeing them driven before you & hearings the lamentation of their women.

        Reply

      • Brady miaau

        September 27, 2013 at 08:14

        Yeah, wrong sort of empire

        Reply

      • Emm

        September 27, 2013 at 08:44

        In the case I need to hire a couple of girl scouts to sell these cookies because my boss is going to cancel my pay cheque

        Reply

  13. Brady miaau

    September 27, 2013 at 08:14

    What did you do?

    NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

    Reply

  14. Brady miaau

    September 27, 2013 at 08:29

    Strategies:

    1. Do you bother rapidly clicking? I did to start off with, but I am not a hands off owner, as far as possible
    2. Are farms the best to get initially because of the 2 upgrades that double farm efficiency?
    3. Is bigger better, i.e. Mines before factories?
    4. What is the critical mass point of each level, i.e. at what does it stop being of maximum benefit to buy, say, a farm, over a mine?

    Just some thoughts.

    Reply

    • Her Highness the Hipster

      September 27, 2013 at 08:44

      never underestimate the grandmas. also, there are achievements for getting certain numbers of farms, factories, etc.
      at a certain point, i stopped clicking the cookie unless i got a golden cookie – then the multiplier effects are worthwhile.

      Reply

  15. SilentMaster

    September 27, 2013 at 08:30

    just bought myself million fingers and host factories and portals, damn i hate this game now because i cant stop πŸ™

    Reply

  16. TiMsTeR1033

    September 27, 2013 at 08:36

    Awesome! thanks for the link Zoe, I shall try my hand at this πŸ™‚

    Reply

  17. UltimateNinjaPandaDudeGuy

    September 27, 2013 at 08:41

    Opened it up… Click like 500 times and closed it again…

    Cookie clicker not even once… Okay no more than 500 times

    Reply

  18. Axon1988

    September 27, 2013 at 08:44

    My grannies have mutated to such an extend… the game has become scary. With grannies everywhere. Looking at me with bloody glowing eyes. My milk is boiling red (I think it’s blood now) and the background is just scary old rotten grannies. WTF

    Reply

    • Her Highness the Hipster

      September 27, 2013 at 08:44

      but the greed! you can’t stop, can you?

      Reply

      • Axon1988

        September 27, 2013 at 08:48

        My grannies are freezing in streets and oozing sugary syrup! I’m generating almost a billion cookies every second… I don’t know what;s going on anymore!

        Reply

  19. Umar Jaeger

    September 27, 2013 at 08:55

    Dafuq happened to my grannies???

    Reply

    • Her Highness the Hipster

      September 27, 2013 at 10:12

      have you tried selling one yet?

      Reply

      • That Happy Twit

        September 27, 2013 at 10:19

        HAHAHA @ Achievement title

        Reply

      • Umar Jaeger

        September 27, 2013 at 10:35

        Just wrong lol

        Reply

  20. CypherGate

    September 27, 2013 at 09:47

    lol mad game. I been playing for 40mins now and im only on 184 000 cookies

    Reply

  21. DadGamer

    September 27, 2013 at 09:58

    What’s next Zoe? You gonna hand out cigarettes to school kids?
    LOL, thanks. Love this digital crack πŸ™‚

    Reply

  22. Jean Jordaan

    September 27, 2013 at 10:05

    What did you do !!
    Years from now, while sitting under a bridge. Jobless , no food no money only a laptop, leaching WIFI from some poor fool with no password on their WIFI. We will think back to this day where it all started going wrong.
    All this while clicking and buying that additional granny..
    DAMN YOUUUUUUU!!!

    Reply

    • That Happy Twit

      September 27, 2013 at 10:07

      HAHA!

      Reply

    • Emm

      September 27, 2013 at 10:42

      Dont forget the power cord plugged directly into the lamp post after removing one of the covers

      Reply

    • Jean Jordaan

      September 27, 2013 at 10:56

      and Mad MAX driving around in this post apocalyptic world, with laptop on his lap clicking and building his granny army.

      Reply

  23. J-P Edwards

    September 27, 2013 at 12:59

    Great way to click test my R.A.T.7 Contagion…Ill let you know how it goes…

    Reply

  24. skaapsker

    September 27, 2013 at 13:30

    There it is.. Currently sitting at 3,711,425,603.2 CPS

    Reply

  25. HvR

    September 27, 2013 at 13:48

    Dammit Zoe, you are pure evil.

    Oh well.

    Click my koekie Click my koekie snoekie……

    Reply

  26. Shaun Crosby

    September 27, 2013 at 14:00

    I hate this game so much I can’t stop playing it.

    So bad that I actually clicked on the cookie in your screen shots….. Sigh.

    Reply

  27. Guest

    September 27, 2013 at 14:58

    my CPS is 513 million clicks/second

    Reply

  28. Sargon

    September 27, 2013 at 16:04

    The amount must increase exponentially as you play. In a weekend, I shall have matched your cookie per second score! πŸ˜€

    Reply

  29. Bridget Blake Taylor

    September 28, 2013 at 04:35

    16,991,910.684 cps

    Reply

  30. Severen

    September 28, 2013 at 05:39

    My CPS right about now is 18,326,718,684.6

    Reply

  31. Kobus Nel

    September 28, 2013 at 15:09

    Yup, I’m going to say it… D3 is a better click fest game than this shit. Seriously guys. There are way better games to spend our time on.

    Reply

  32. Scyer

    October 2, 2013 at 03:41

  33. Arian

    October 2, 2013 at 22:58

    My cps is 131,603,666.4

    Reply

  34. Josh

    October 3, 2013 at 01:13

    Hopefully im a candidate on your high score list. consider me a challenger!

    Reply

  35. Pixieboots101

    October 5, 2013 at 14:55

    How about..

    My CPS is 34,325,627,399.7

    I think Im worst than you. πŸ˜›

    Reply

    • Deiran Coffman-Monk

      October 22, 2013 at 09:22

      Look at me ahahaha

      Reply

  36. Br76

    October 26, 2013 at 17:23

    I’m thinking about resetting for the fourth time.

    Reply

  37. Br76

    October 26, 2013 at 17:41

    I just noticed that the farm message box was hiding some of my stats in the last screenshot.

    Reply

  38. Bob

    October 29, 2013 at 22:13

    My CPS is 21,443,960,443.9 and I have been playing for about a month or so. Things get expensive.

    Reply

  39. Alex

    November 25, 2013 at 18:02

  40. Alexander Ya

    November 29, 2013 at 23:22

  41. leo

    December 3, 2013 at 18:29

    it looks boring but wen u play it for like a min u carnt stop playing it. no joke

    Reply

  42. fluttershy

    December 13, 2013 at 19:58

    my cps is so high its e+ i almost have 650 of every thing and almost achievements only 2 left idk why i play…

    Reply

  43. guest

    February 7, 2014 at 16:17

    i get 327,661,121,102.5 cookies per second and have multiplyer:14,357%

    Reply

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