Home Gaming Cheated to earn gold in Witcher 3? The taxman’s coming for you…

Cheated to earn gold in Witcher 3? The taxman’s coming for you…

1 min read
45

There are only three certainties in life; Death, Taxes, and that Darryn will mispronounce words that no other human beings over the age of three have trouble saying.

The Witcher 3’s first expansion, Hearts of Stone is out now – and like the base game before it, it’s rather excellent – and a great reason to dust if your copy of The Witcher 3 if you’ve been playing other things since. It does, however, have something none of us like very much -and perhaps the worst sort of character you’d want to see if you’re trying to escape reality: The Taxman.

CD Projekt Red have cleverly put in a taxman, who knows whether you’ve been naughty or nice. You see, there were a few exploits in The Witcher 3 that could be used to farm for gold, essentially destroying the virtual economy. Perhaps you killed a hundred cows for their hide, or traded oysters for their pearls so you could sell them for a massive profit.

The taxman, he knows (Via Kotaku).

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But before you panic about the prospect of having to give your hard-earned gold to the state, if you promise that you’ve not done any of this, you’re let off scot-free, and even given a tax certificate. So just like real life, if you’re in to tax evasion.

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You can watch the whole exchange via video if you like, courtesy of WhatsMyGame. There’s a lot more bureaucratic twaddle in the video, so it’s certainly worth watching.

Last Updated: October 15, 2015

45 Comments

  1. Alien Emperor Trevor

    October 15, 2015 at 09:35

    lolllllllllll That is genius.

    Reply

  2. Grand Admiral Chief

    October 15, 2015 at 09:36

    HAHAHAHA

    Reply

    • Grand Admiral Chief

      October 15, 2015 at 09:37

      Also, just for Geoff:

      http://i.imgur.com/RXrET7C.gif

      Reply

      • Brady miaau

        October 15, 2015 at 09:39

        And My daughter. Sent link to my wife, thanks.

        Reply

        • Grand Admiral Chief

          October 15, 2015 at 09:42

          Today, Geoff will be getting LOADS of Minions

          Reply

          • RinceThis

            October 15, 2015 at 09:43

            You fiend you 🙂

          • Brady miaau

            October 15, 2015 at 09:43

            Does he need more help? Or just being fiendly?

            Are Darryn, Matthy, Kyle, Zoe and so forth not enough?

          • Grand Admiral Chief

            October 15, 2015 at 09:48

            What do you think?

            😀

          • Brady miaau

            October 15, 2015 at 10:09

            I try not to, the doctor says it causes headaches. And to pay here.

      • Hammersteyn

        October 15, 2015 at 09:48

        MEhnions

        Reply

        • Grand Admiral Chief

          October 15, 2015 at 09:49

          #MinionThursday4Geoff

          Reply

          • Dutch Matrix

            October 15, 2015 at 10:03

            TL;DR

          • Hammersteyn

            October 15, 2015 at 10:05

            *Leaves

          • Grand Admiral Chief

            October 15, 2015 at 10:08

            *pauses hammer_spellchecker.bat

  3. Brady miaau

    October 15, 2015 at 09:38

    Ah tax. How complicated. The taxman hires people to close the loopholes, so the corporations hire people to find more and so and so on. Asimov, in his Foundation novel, made that point.

    I love the way CDPR looks at real world and game world and somehow uses game world as a mirror into real world. All while keeping it light-hearted and fun.

    Reply

    • Alien Emperor Trevor

      October 15, 2015 at 09:48

      Looking at the world with all its… imp-perfections.

      Reply

      • RinceThis

        October 15, 2015 at 09:56

        Get in the corner!

        Reply

        • Brady miaau

          October 15, 2015 at 10:11

          Why? That was great.

          Is this like a hulk thing? (Edit – Hulk is green, right?)

          Reply

      • Brady miaau

        October 15, 2015 at 10:09

        certainly, yes. Myth-Nomers and Im-Pervections

        Not a bad book.

        Reply

  4. StarKitty

    October 15, 2015 at 09:40

    Man, that is brilliant.

    Reply

  5. RinceThis

    October 15, 2015 at 09:42

    Oh man I love these people! Fan service to a new level.

    Reply

  6. RinceThis

    October 15, 2015 at 09:44

    I so look forward to getting home and jamming Witcher III! Been way too long since I could.

    Reply

    • Grand Admiral Chief

      October 15, 2015 at 09:44

      Same!

      Reply

      • Dutch Matrix

        October 15, 2015 at 09:45

        THE SIMS 4 LYF!

        Reply

      • RinceThis

        October 15, 2015 at 09:46

        Actually… Guild broke me! He made me play Destiny… And… And… I ENJOYED IT! The shame!

        Reply

        • Alien Emperor Trevor

          October 15, 2015 at 09:47

          Reply

          • RinceThis

            October 15, 2015 at 09:48

            🙁

          • Alien Emperor Trevor

            October 15, 2015 at 09:50

            Oh wait, he made you play Destiny. I read too quickly.

          • RinceThis

            October 15, 2015 at 09:52

            You shut your piehole!

          • Grand Admiral Chief

            October 15, 2015 at 09:53

          • RinceThis

            October 15, 2015 at 09:53

            HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!

          • Dutch Matrix

            October 15, 2015 at 10:04

            The look you get from every girl whenever you drop your trousers?

          • Alien Emperor Trevor

            October 15, 2015 at 10:16

            I never drop my trousers. I fold them neatly and put them on a hanger. That’s how they last.

          • Dutch Matrix

            October 15, 2015 at 10:18

            You carry a hanger in your trousers?

          • Alien Emperor Trevor

            October 15, 2015 at 10:19

            huehuehue

        • Grand Admiral Chief

          October 15, 2015 at 09:48

          Guild likes breaking things

          Reply

          • Alien Emperor Trevor

            October 15, 2015 at 09:55

            Does that make Rince his trophy?

          • Grand Admiral Chief

            October 15, 2015 at 09:56

            I’m not touching that with a borrowed braai tong

    • Alien Emperor Trevor

      October 15, 2015 at 09:49

      This weekend we start the expansion. WOOHOO!

      Reply

      • RinceThis

        October 15, 2015 at 09:52

        So… I’ll be doing that sometime in 2017?

        Reply

        • Nikola

          October 15, 2015 at 10:31

          Just play Destiny you know you want to;)

          Reply

  7. WitWolfy

    October 15, 2015 at 09:55

    If he came to me.. I’d be like.. “I defeated the Wild hunt.. YOU’RE WELCOME!”

    Reply

  8. Spy Master Tokashi

    October 15, 2015 at 11:22

    That is funny…

    I really do not understand why people had to cheat, it is so easy to make gold in Witcher 3. I had 40k before I started the final part, then I upgraded everything and bought potions etc. and I still had about 15k left after that.

    Kiddies today are not that financially bright anymore 😉

    Reply

  9. Raptor Rants

    October 15, 2015 at 12:51

    Lol wurt?

    Reply

  10. Raptor Rants

    October 15, 2015 at 12:52

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