I just want you all to know that my first book, 50 Shades Of a Grain Of Truth, is out this week. It’s a tell-all expose about the gaming industry, just how much beer Gavin actually drinks, Geoff’s face and Zoe spelling words like an American. It’s going to make some waves yo. Buy it now, before I shill even more shamelessly!
In Other News: Assassin’s Creed 4 outstabs Battlefield 4, no DLC for Super Mario, Warhammer goes free and from Sif to Wonder Woman.
Here’s the news that we didn’t post today, because we were too busy being scared of Espurr.
News
UK Game charts – Assassin’s Creed 4 beats Battlefield 4 to first
First Call of Duty’s project name was "MOH Killer"
Warhammer Online free to all account holders pre-closure
God of War Ascension game director leaves Sony Santa Monica
Is Rocksteady’s next game coming in 2014?
Battlefield 4 bugs detailed by DICE, studio working to patch them
Nintendo breaks previous digital sales record
No DLC for Super Mario 3D World
Stuff
Evan Amos is gaming’s most popular photographer
Halloween is the best week for cosplay
Retrospective – Katamari Damacy
A live action look back at the original trailer for Dead Island
Videos
Kerbal Space Program – Day of the Dead trailer
Thief – Basso’s gamble trailer
Dementium II HD – Debut teaser
What’s on at The Movies
Cinophile – Priscilla: Queen of the desert
Joe Cornish could boldly direct where no man has directed before in Star Trek 3
Monday Box Office Report – Ender’s game over for everyone else
Jeff Tremaine must be Dr Feelgood, because he wants to adapt the Motley Crue biopic The Dirt
Director Tim Miller and Ryan Reynolds say talk Deadpool movie
Rumour – Is Thor’s Jaimie Alexander in talks with WB and DC for the role of Wonder Woman?
Model: Selena Gomez
Last Updated: November 4, 2013
Lardus-Resident Perve
November 4, 2013 at 16:02
Sy word mooi groot! Can use her wizardly powers on me anytime
Captain GUZ
November 4, 2013 at 16:06
Feeling really old now
NostalgicMossel
November 4, 2013 at 16:08
Age > x/2 + 7 ? Where x = age of specimen. If so, then walk away.
Vampyre Squirrel
November 4, 2013 at 16:10
I’m good if she’s 21 and a half 😛
And she’s 21
NostalgicMossel
November 4, 2013 at 16:15
lol shes born in July 1992, that makes it 21.416. You missed it bro.
TiMsTeR1033
November 4, 2013 at 16:16
She looks like a 16year old or something..
NostalgicMossel
November 4, 2013 at 16:17
Not sure when that pic was taken though. But according to master google she is 21.
Vampyre Squirrel
November 4, 2013 at 16:17
Problem being what exactly? lol
TiMsTeR1033
November 4, 2013 at 16:19
You sure you wanna say that? call you next “DirtyoldSquirrel”
Vampyre Squirrel
November 4, 2013 at 16:24
bwahahaha!
Vampyre Squirrel
November 4, 2013 at 16:17
Shit! lmao
I’ll round it up to 21.5 😛
NostalgicMossel
November 4, 2013 at 16:18
Close enough! hehe
NostalgicMossel
November 4, 2013 at 16:20
Im still in the clear, can go down to 19!
Vampyre Squirrel
November 4, 2013 at 16:22
That’s unfair!!!
*sings* I wish I was a little bit younger…
TiMsTeR1033
November 4, 2013 at 16:22
*sings* but instead you close to being an old man..
Vampyre Squirrel
November 4, 2013 at 16:23
lol!
NostalgicMossel
November 4, 2013 at 16:22
Think I should make a trip to Stellies this weekend…
TiMsTeR1033
November 4, 2013 at 16:24
pick up a stukkie young vleis?
Devourer of Small Bunnies
November 5, 2013 at 11:39
hahahaha
HvR
November 4, 2013 at 17:51
if (girl_age > (own_age / 2 + 7))
execute_the_moves
else if (own_income < (girl_income * 2))
execute_operation_suga_daddy
else
ERROR: wat kyk jy skurwe ou oom
NostalgicMossel
November 5, 2013 at 07:05
LOOL!! Well done!
ToshZA
November 4, 2013 at 21:26
I’m late on this but w/e.
Safe age for me according to this is 20.5. And I won’t even consider anything under 23/24 years. Hmmm.
Unavengedavo(aka. IceCreamMan)
November 4, 2013 at 16:53
You just want her to flick your wand 😉
Lardus-Resident Perve
November 4, 2013 at 16:54
Indeed!
GalacticLordCaptainAwesomeness
November 5, 2013 at 08:04
Lekker Tieflike Liete…
TiMsTeR1033
November 4, 2013 at 16:03
Such a young face damn!
NostalgicMossel
November 4, 2013 at 16:06
Ah Selena, always puts a smile on my face.
NostalgicMossel
November 4, 2013 at 16:07
Where’s the link to the book? Or are you joking?
Vampyre Squirrel
November 4, 2013 at 16:09
It’s scary how hot Selena Gomez is for such a young chick… almost makes me feel bad for thinking that way… almost, but not… bwahahahaha!
She’s f*cken hawt!
TiMsTeR1033
November 4, 2013 at 16:14
She looks too young!
Vampyre Squirrel
November 4, 2013 at 16:18
Do a Google Images search and tell me that again.
TiMsTeR1033
November 4, 2013 at 16:20
STILL TOO YOUNG!
Vampyre Squirrel
November 4, 2013 at 16:22
lmao… and you’re younger than me.
I’m disappointed Tim, DIS-A-PPOINTED!
TiMsTeR1033
November 4, 2013 at 16:23
I’m older in mind!
Vampyre Squirrel
November 4, 2013 at 16:24
I’ll confirm that with your wife and when I meet you 😛
TiMsTeR1033
November 4, 2013 at 16:24
I have always been the old young guy….
Vampyre Squirrel
November 4, 2013 at 16:25
Oom Tim!
TiMsTeR1033
November 4, 2013 at 16:26
hahah You see not only did I feel older my hair showed me I was older inside by receding!
Unavengedavo(aka. IceCreamMan)
November 4, 2013 at 16:27
Lol, what do you call 10 rabbits marching backwards?
A receding hare line…
Vampyre Squirrel
November 4, 2013 at 16:28
lol!!! gotta remember that one
Vampyre Squirrel
November 4, 2013 at 16:27
LOL!!! You’re not the only one… my hair started receding early too.
Doesn’t make me look wiser though.
TiMsTeR1033
November 4, 2013 at 16:29
Before I cut my long hair I looked Like a criminal! The days in college with my long locks! I miss those days! Nah not really! I got tired of people asking me if I sold weed and Tik haha
Vampyre Squirrel
November 4, 2013 at 16:32
I thought you still looked like a criminal… guess I was wrong 😛
TiMsTeR1033
November 4, 2013 at 16:34
Gee thanks!
Vampyre Squirrel
November 4, 2013 at 16:35
no problem mate 🙂
you look nothing like a criminal though… Rince on the other hand 😛
TiMsTeR1033
November 4, 2013 at 16:35
He looks like a Pirate!
Vampyre Squirrel
November 4, 2013 at 16:40
EXACTLY!!! lol
A Ginger Pirate no less.
Sageville
November 4, 2013 at 16:18
Agreed.
SaintsRowNigri
November 4, 2013 at 16:28
Dude, take a deep breath and relax. My dad is 65. His fiancé is 24. So these guys going all ga-ga over Selena Gomez is not that bad, when you consider the alternative…
TiMsTeR1033
November 4, 2013 at 16:30
I respect your father! he caught himself a young one!
SaintsRowNigri
November 4, 2013 at 16:32
I don’t. Never has the term “cradle snatcher” hit home so hard…
TiMsTeR1033
November 4, 2013 at 16:34
You are older than his fiance arnt you?
SaintsRowNigri
November 4, 2013 at 16:37
Yup. Oh the scandal that has befell me!
TiMsTeR1033
November 4, 2013 at 16:37
Eish that’s a bit tricky hey!
Captain GUZ
November 4, 2013 at 20:44
Hot step-mom ?
NostalgicMossel
November 4, 2013 at 16:17
Agreed! Also, SHE’S MINE!
TiMsTeR1033
November 4, 2013 at 16:20
You dirty old men!
NostalgicMossel
November 4, 2013 at 16:21
lol she’s only 3 years younger than me!
TiMsTeR1033
November 4, 2013 at 16:22
So you 24?
NostalgicMossel
November 4, 2013 at 16:23
Indeed. 😉
TiMsTeR1033
November 4, 2013 at 16:25
Then you have nothing to feel bad about! I wish I was still 24!
Vampyre Squirrel
November 4, 2013 at 16:25
Me too lol
Unalighned John (JJ)
November 4, 2013 at 16:39
Same here. Simpler times
Skyblue
November 4, 2013 at 23:15
Stalk much?
Matthew Holliday
November 5, 2013 at 09:31
She’s 21 now.
feel free to ogle.
I find it scarier that Sarah Hyland, that plays Hayley in Modern Family is actually 22.
Unavengedavo(aka. IceCreamMan)
November 4, 2013 at 16:12
Justin Beiber’s lesbian lover 😛
ToshZA
November 4, 2013 at 16:17
Selena, I guess you couldn’t do better, than a teeny bedwetter, oh oh oooooooohoh, Selena. And Justina. With no wiener. Yeah.
On a hotness note: no hips or waistline. Decent rack, but this is meh. And yes, I feel dirty. And I love it!
SaintsRowNigri
November 4, 2013 at 16:22
…
ToshZA
November 4, 2013 at 16:33
A news24 stub? Really? You’re going to bring the downvote troll back from there with your antics here. Also, hookers don’t ask questions, so why would they question the missing “bits”?
SaintsRowNigri
November 4, 2013 at 16:35
Ha ha! Geoffs earlier header comes to mind!!! And no stress, the stub is actually a screen grab from webmail
ToshZA
November 4, 2013 at 16:40
Hahaha, yes, yes it does. 😀
Well, if its from webmail then maybe, just maybe. One can hope.
Unavengedavo(aka. IceCreamMan)
November 4, 2013 at 16:34
Must be a part time job…
SaintsRowNigri
November 4, 2013 at 16:38
Hopefully he did not come up short
ToshZA
November 4, 2013 at 16:39
Oooh, eina bliksem. Which, incidentally, isn’t what she said.
SaintsRowNigri
November 4, 2013 at 16:43
Nope. When he put her hand on his dick, she said: Sorry. Cigarettes are bad for my health…
ToshZA
November 4, 2013 at 16:45
She found it? Wow, she must have had a lot of practice in these matters.
SaintsRowNigri
November 4, 2013 at 16:47
OK. We need to stop now. Talking way too much of Justin Bieber’s dick. Or lack thereof….
ToshZA
November 4, 2013 at 16:48
You’re right. Of course.
Unavengedavo(aka. IceCreamMan)
November 4, 2013 at 16:56
Again… This just fits so perfectly
Unalighned John (JJ)
November 4, 2013 at 16:41
Probably the only way a woman would touch him.
ToshZA
November 4, 2013 at 16:42
Are you sure it was a woman? Sex changes are free in Brazil.
Unalighned John (JJ)
November 4, 2013 at 16:43
You’re probably right.
SaintsRowNigri
November 4, 2013 at 16:46
Yup. The news article got it all wrong. The lady only wanted to see what a man sans dick looks like. To convince her that the sex change is what she wants. Justin was doing some good PR here…
Jim Lenoir (Banana Jim)
November 4, 2013 at 16:29
Why is Justin Bieber the ION?
SaintsRowNigri
November 4, 2013 at 16:30
Eish, Banana. Do you hate Selena THAT much???
TiMsTeR1033
November 4, 2013 at 16:31
I hate her personality! Her looks I can deal with..
SaintsRowNigri
November 4, 2013 at 16:34
Why? Have you met her? No offence meant, but you can bring out the bitch in Mother Theresa (May she rest in peace…)
TiMsTeR1033
November 4, 2013 at 16:35
ME?? WTH I do?
ToshZA
November 4, 2013 at 16:41
YOU WERE BORN!
Vampyre Squirrel
November 4, 2013 at 16:46
not sure that was entirely called for… even if it’s meant as a joke.
TiMsTeR1033
November 4, 2013 at 16:48
You were born GINGER! TAKE THAT!
ToshZA
November 4, 2013 at 16:49
FML! T_T
Vampyre Squirrel
November 4, 2013 at 16:49
Come back of the week!
TiMsTeR1033
November 4, 2013 at 16:50
No come back of the week would be riding over him in a yellow hummer… but sadly they far and few between…
Vampyre Squirrel
November 4, 2013 at 16:50
Too true…
TiMsTeR1033
November 4, 2013 at 16:51
Not the case in Capetown I have heard!
Vampyre Squirrel
November 4, 2013 at 16:51
As long as OVG isn’t in one of them, then it’s ok
TiMsTeR1033
November 4, 2013 at 16:54
id raise Ovg hummer with a truck! The damage I could cause…*day dreams*
Unalighned John (JJ)
November 4, 2013 at 16:43
Tim is a kind soul people. Dark and dangerous when the sun goes down.
(Got your back Tim)
Vampyre Squirrel
November 4, 2013 at 16:46
Yep, you’re right. Tim’s a good person… although he seems misunderstood by many here.
People seem to take advantage of how badly he can read sarcasm… I’m guilty of it from time to time, but trying to curb it so he can enjoy commenting as much as us.
SaintsRowNigri
November 4, 2013 at 16:49
Ag, Tim will learn, same way we all had I believe… But yeah, we NEED THAT SARCASM FONT!
TiMsTeR1033
November 4, 2013 at 16:51
I got sarcasm!
ToshZA
November 4, 2013 at 16:52
Yeah.
TiMsTeR1033
November 4, 2013 at 16:54
Yeah!
Vampyre Squirrel
November 4, 2013 at 16:51
I don’t really want to BOLD or ITALICS or STRIKETHROUGH everything I type in sarcasm 😛
Edit: Oh or UNDERLINE
TiMsTeR1033
November 4, 2013 at 16:55
if you had that you would turn back into the infamous PHYSCHOSQUIRREL! Yes I remembered lol
Vampyre Squirrel
November 4, 2013 at 16:56
Lmao!!! Yeah I would become PsychoSquirrel again… and that’s not entirely a good thing.
TiMsTeR1033
November 4, 2013 at 16:57
It could be worse! I could go back to Ghost1033! In my more unstable frame of mind!
TiMsTeR1033
November 4, 2013 at 16:48
Thanks man!
SaintsRowNigri
November 4, 2013 at 16:29
OK. Who was me again?
TiMsTeR1033
November 4, 2013 at 16:59
I IS OUTTA HERE! HAVE A GOOD ONE DUDES!
Vampyre Squirrel
November 4, 2013 at 16:59
I’m out! Later freaks!
I-Pity-the-Fool
November 4, 2013 at 17:06
[multi-syllable] Damn! She can borrow my wizard wand any time ;). I wouldn’t mind sampling those forbidden fruits…okay I’ll stop now. Really though, when did she get so hot! Wow.
Skyblue
November 5, 2013 at 00:01
Funniest thing I read all day was in the Dead Island Trailer relook
“*Not the Cannes International Film Festival. The “Cannes Lions International Festival of Creativity.” But it’s still in France.P”
Devourer of Small Bunnies
November 5, 2013 at 11:40
I’d be keen on a swim