Home Gaming Just Cause 3’s Mech Land Assault is a fun but buggy mess

Just Cause 3’s Mech Land Assault is a fun but buggy mess

2 min read
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Just-Cause-3-Mech-Assault-2.jpg

If you’re still playing Just Cause 3, then you’re probably the kind of person who has a full back tattoo of Michael Bay. Yes, Just Cause 3 isn’t perfect. But as a sandbox that players can destroy one statue at a time with a variety of explosives? It’s kind of superb. Just Cause 3 is also massive. So bloody massive, that taking a car is pointless. You’re better off sticking to riding air currents, whether it be from a fighter jet or your own wingsuit.

The first bit of DLC in the Air, Land and Sea pass gave Rico a substantial upgrade to his wingsuit, essentially turning him into Iron Man but with a suave accent. It was a decent diversion. Lengthy enough to spend an afternoon on, even if the story was rubbish and the action was predictable. The latest bit of DLC, Mech Land Assault is more of the same really. It’s just almost completely broken as well.

Look, the entire setup is rubbish. Black Hand troops have Eden technology, and Rico has to stop them from going global with all that advanced hardware. It’s the stuff of Steve Seagal bargain bin DVDs. But there’s nothing wrong with that. The real charm, is in the new vehicle: A proper mech, that can roll around on four wheels and punch stuff. Or shoot stuff. Or even use magnets to attract said stuff and fling it over a cliff.

Brilliant stuff, with technology that was pilfered from a VHS copy of Robot Jox. I have zero complaints about that. It’s the execution of all this that gets to me. Numerous bugs are present here, so here’s a list of what I encountered because why not:

Just-Cause-3-Mech-Assault-1.jpg

  • Ammo was missing on respawns.
  • Mechs would be stuck forever if they rolled over a rock the wrong way
  • Explosions were missing
  • Guns refused to fire
  • Frame-rate matched my IQ during intense scenes, crawling to single digits at times
  • Random pratfalls
  • Numerous game crashes
  • Black Hand troops frozen in the ether of an explosion, unmoving and trapped for all eternity in a quantum lock as I stood next to them and emptied magazine after magazine into them

Massively annoying then, especially with some missions getting a bit hectic. Mech Land Assault wasn’t the kind of DLC that I was epxecting to see reach the same highs as The Witcher III: Blood and Wine. But it was a slice of extra content for Just Cause 3 that I was hoping to lose myself within for a few hours on the weekend.

Instead, what could have been a swell distraction was an infuriating series of restarts that almost ended with a PS4 controller-shaped hole in my TV. Someone get a patch sorted for Mech Land Assault, ASAP.

*Also, I’m saying Meh Land Assault so that I can claim FIRST.

Last Updated: June 7, 2016

26 Comments

  1. I love Mechs. It’s weird.

    Reply

    • Hammersteyn_hates_Raid0

      June 7, 2016 at 11:10

      It’s not weird. Mechs are life.

      Reply

      • Ir0nseraph

        June 7, 2016 at 11:15

        No that’s Mei 😛

        Reply

        • Hammersteyn_hates_Raid0

          June 7, 2016 at 11:29

          Not the last time I saw her

          Reply

      • Darren Peach

        June 7, 2016 at 11:17

        I remember watching the third Matrix film and had a total Nerdgasm when the battle took place with those dudes in their Mech suits and the squid only to be yanked out of nirvana by some chick laughing in a hysterical manner as she failed to suspend her belief…….. enough. Needles to say, I felt like a loser right at that moment.

        Reply

        • Hammersteyn_hates_Raid0

          June 7, 2016 at 11:29

          Maybe she was busy on her phone with an IQ test?

          Reply

          • Captain JJ of the desert

            June 7, 2016 at 11:30

            XD

          • Darren Peach

            June 7, 2016 at 11:38

            Who knows, although not intentional, she made me feel small.

          • Hammersteyn_hates_Raid0

            June 7, 2016 at 12:49

            Shame man, I would’ve shushed her as hard as I could. Dignity is overrated

  2. Darren Peach

    June 7, 2016 at 11:07

    Full back chop of Bay. Should lock that person in a room and make him or her watch Pearl Harbour or Harbor until their eyes bleed.

    Reply

    • Captain JJ of the desert

      June 7, 2016 at 11:27

      Pacific Rim was like watching Power Rangers with a giant machine fighting an ungodly monster. I liked that.

      Reply

      • Darren Peach

        June 7, 2016 at 11:46

        I also loved Godzilla. But now that you mention it, I can see the Power Ranger angle. The two doctors and Mr Perlman were cartoon characters.

        Reply

        • Captain JJ of the desert

          June 7, 2016 at 11:50

          I haven’t watched Godzilla actually

          Reply

          • Darren Peach

            June 7, 2016 at 11:58

            That you have to decide for yourself, but what I will say is Godzilla is a badass in this one and there is a ultra awkward scene with Kick ass and Olsen older sister playing happily married couple ( the only negative scene in the film ) and there is a haunting visual in the final act of the film.

          • Captain JJ of the desert

            June 7, 2016 at 12:16

            I think I’ll give it a try. I like most sci-fi. So I’m in!

  3. Hammersteyn_hates_Raid0

    June 7, 2016 at 11:09

    Did you try deleting the DLC and redownloading it?

    Reply

    • Greylingad[He Charges!]

      June 7, 2016 at 11:59

      HAHAHA!!!

      Reply

  4. Hammersteyn_hates_Raid0

    June 7, 2016 at 11:10

    It’s rather small for mech 😐

    Reply

    • Admiral Chief Maximum Effort

      June 7, 2016 at 11:59

      Needs to be a few stories high, and at least 80ton

      Reply

      • Hammersteyn_hates_Raid0

        June 7, 2016 at 12:48

        YES! Now we’re talking!

        Reply

  5. Alien Emperor Trevor

    June 7, 2016 at 11:22

    JC2 was so fun, but JC3 on PC is a buggy mess by all reports.

    Reply

    • Darren Peach

      June 7, 2016 at 11:24

      I dipped into the series and tried JC2. Alas, the appeal still eludes me.

      Reply

  6. Captain JJ of the desert

    June 7, 2016 at 11:26

    I could get hours of fun from this game playing co-op, but SP it might get a bit boring too soon.

    Reply

  7. Greylingad[He Charges!]

    June 7, 2016 at 12:00

    HAHAHAHAHA!!!!

    “One two three YalloBlahBlahBlah”

    HAHAHAHAHA!!!!

    Reply

  8. Strawman Jim

    June 10, 2016 at 11:51

    I just finished the previous DLC… what an awesome addition to the game. I’ll be keen to check this one out, but as usual, given that this is Just Cause, I’ll wait till the first patch or two…

    Reply

  9. Treezle

    June 13, 2016 at 12:29

    I loved JC2. That was my game. JC3 is awesome, but it’s so buggy. Played it first time this weekend, and the frame rate drops to single digits. It’s disappointing.

    Reply

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