Scientifically accurate Duck Tales will break you

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duck tales

Duck Tales! Woo Hoo! Thanks to M-Net open time, we all grew up knowing about those wonderful pantsless ducks who went on weekly adventures with their rich bastard uncle. But Duck Tales is a children’s fantasy. And there’s a  reason why. Because real ducks are corkscrew penis rape monsters. More NSFW facts after the jump.

Necrophiliac, crap anywhere rape monsters. That’s what ducks are. Well there goes my childhood. Which is going to make playing that Duck Tales HD updated game even more difficult later this year.

Last Updated: January 5, 2017

Darryn Bonthuys

Something wrong gentlemen? You come here prepared to read the words of a madman, and instead found a lunatic obsessed with comics, Batman and Raul Julia's M Bison performance in the 1994 Street Fighter movie? Fine! Keep your bio! In fact, now might be a good time to pray to it!

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