The biggest problem in The Division right now are trolls blocking doorways

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Division-troll

You’re all loaded up. You’ve got your mission, a gun that is greasier than a McDonald’s breakfast special and enough skills to pay all the bills. And then some. LETS DO DIS! Wait, hang on. Hey buddy, could you move out of the way, I can’t get through. Hey c’mon now, we’ve got to go save New York! DAMMIT MAN, PEOPLE ARE DYING OUT THERE WHILE YOU DO JUMPING JACKS!

Sound familiar? The Division has only been live for a few hours, and already the griefers have struck. The latest new technique in trolling the excited, comes courtesy of the American architectural system, as griefers have decided to block these doorways. With emotes. In hub areas where numerous players are gathered and friendly fire is on at all times, this is one aggravating new development.

According to Reddit, some players have even taken things further by requesting a password for entrance into safe-rooms, in a most amusing parody of Beerfest/PlayStation Home.

You can still get past these nuisances, but it’ll require some uncanny pushing on your part. Or you could wait for the juvenile trolls to get bored and move on. And then take note of their player handle. Befriend them, work with them. Tackle the toughest of missions together.

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And then, on one cold and fateful night in the Dark Zone, you spring your trap. You get the entire The Division community to go rogue on that one single person, setting up teams at every safe house and exit, eventually boxing the f***er in until he finds himself surrounded by dozens of guns all pointed at him. He’s already packed with loot, possibly the best loot that he’ll ever find thanks to all of your help. And you’re about to strip him of it. OOOOOH WHAT YOU SAY HEY! THAT YOU ONLY MEANT WELL! WELL OF COURSE YOU DID!

Listen, I hold a grudge. Stop being a troll. Let me through the damn door already.

Last Updated: March 9, 2016

Darryn Bonthuys

Something wrong gentlemen? You come here prepared to read the words of a madman, and instead found a lunatic obsessed with comics, Batman and Raul Julia's M Bison performance in the 1994 Street Fighter movie? Fine! Keep your bio! In fact, now might be a good time to pray to it!

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