Too hot to write anything. Brain melting. Secret lobe containing fan fiction of Lucy Lawless Xena adventures, dissolving. Heeeeeeeeelp…
HEARTHSTONE! Easily one of the most addictive card games ever made, Hearthstone has been in a closed beta for months now, while Russian readers begged us for keys to get into the game. Well beg no more comrades, because the beta is now open to all! And don’t forget our handy dandy guide to getting started in Hearthstone!
American copyright law is utterly ridiculous, and while I understand that companies need to flex it every now and then to protect their product in the future, it still means that someone is going to get the pointed end of a stick.
That’s the case right now with Candy Crush Saga developer King, who are lawsuiting the indie darling The Banner Saga because of one word. Just one word. Gasp, it’s terrible to think that gamers will confuse a richly detailed epic with a cheaply made puzzle clone.
Best ION Header
While y’all were going on about physics, female anatomy and perhaps spending too much time making flow-charts to verify your points, it looks like Caprice snuck and stole the best ION ward for this week.
This week, Zoe gets the most comments on article and…Really, Zoe? Huh. Well er well done! Anyway, Zoe opened up an omega-can of worms this week, with an article detailing some gross sexism in the industry, that left us all with left-handed palm prints permanently engraved into our foreheads.
Meanwhile, Steve drew with Steve to get the least comments of the week, knocking up a paltry pity comment each on his Oculus Rift post and his Doki Doki Universe review. Naturally, he has been sent back to Austria for re-education.
Batman Of The Week
Despite all his rage, he is still just a bat in a cage. Geoff takes the Batman of the week lead, with our annual standing now at 2-1 with me trailing his bat-rear. Naturally, we’ve begun celebrating the fact that we’ve prevented Gavin and Zoe from reaching that award for yet another week by quoting random lines from the undeniably excellent Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story.
The wrong kid died!
Header Image Of The Week
By an overwhelming demand of three people saying so, I’m taking header image of the week, even though the heat in PE yesterday resulted in me creating something that shouldn’t even be on a Clipart-infused school newsletter. Hooray!
Comment Of The Week
Ah Styx ZA, you made us laugh this week. As we once again stole articles from other sites, copied them word for word and cranked them through the plagiaristicon 3000 for maximum exposure, you also reminded us why we do all this in the first place:
Oh right. I forgot it’s about the money, not the community.
As I sit in my gold-plated SHIELD helicarrier and play games on an Xbox 1.5 (Thanks Microsoft! I loves ya!), I can only look down at the city below me and wonder if Activision will have enough cash this year to afford that 9/10 rating for Call of Duty: Metal Black Ops. After all, I do want to buy a Lamborghini Aventador and paint go-faster stripes on it. Seriously though…Give us money. Please.
Last Updated: January 24, 2014