There’s nothing scary about The Evil Within

1 min read
14

Really? A horror video game? Ooh, look at all that blood, jump scares and supposed psychological torture. I’ve seen scarier stuff in Geoff’s toilet after a night out at various Mexican themed restaurants. This twaddle can’t scare me. So nice try The Evil Within, but I’m not buying any of your horror at all. Go on, do your worst, show me what ya got, it’s just a flesh wound…

NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE!

I take back everything I said in the opening paragraph then. We’re busy drawing straws in the office, to see who the unlucky bugger is that has to review this game. Thanks to the fact that most of us possess yellow bellies, jelly livers and are spineless, this might be the game that finally breaks the Lazygamer staff. Also, Gavin is exempt from awarding us any hazard pay, thanks to a well-worded contract.

The Evil Within will be ruining your best pair of pants on October 14. I’m going to go pour myself a tall glass of nope.

Last Updated: September 17, 2014

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