Home Gaming Work Avoidance Wednesday: Scorched Earth

Work Avoidance Wednesday: Scorched Earth

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It’s the middle of the week. We all know what that means, right? Ready those alt+tab fingers, keep an eye over your shoulder, and prepare yourself for some major distractions… It’s Work Avoidance Wednesday time! Are you a big fan of Worms? Sorry to disappoint, but today’s game does not contain those cute, albeit murderous, slimy, critters. No, I have chosen Scorched Earth – another of my fond childhood gems that likely inspired the entire Worms franchise. It was first released in 1991, so mind the graphics, won’t you?

Scorched Earth plays out pretty much like your typical game of Worms. The goal is simple; eliminate all enemies, using any of the wacky weapons at your fingertips. There are no bazookas or holy hand grenades though. No, you’ll have to make do with the likes of LeapFrogs, Funky Bombs, or more traditional gear like napalm or a nukes. All are equally devastating to the enemy.

OMG ALL THE WEAPONS

But that’s the thing that made Scorched Earth so addictive and fun. Much like Worms, there are wind conditions to take into account, angles to calculate, and velocity to determine. How exactly are you going to shoot that enemy on the other side of the hill with the wind blowing in the wrong direction?

Funky bomb

No problem, you can either parachute down to a better location, or better yet, make use of a digger and tunnel your way through. The problem is, the enemy has the same tools at their fingertips, so you need to take that into account. What if you tunnel into each other? Whoever gets the next opening shot wins!

WOW PRETTY LANDSCAPE

One nice aspect of Scorched Earth is its customisability. You can tweak just about everything before a game to suit your play style or mood. For Work Avoidance Wednesday, I’d recommend turning infinite money on; buy yourself all the toys, and have fun seeing exactly what they all do. Be warned though, you may end up killing yourself a couple of times

Nuke

Another nice feature is that due to the nature of this game, you can partake in turn-based multiplayer. Send your boss out to a fake meeting, gather all your office folk, and prepare to embark on 10-player multiplayer mayhem. Alternately, if you work alone in a desolate office cubicle and everybody hates you, you can try your luck against the CPU.

Player selection

I spent far too much time in this game as a kid. Did you? If not, try it out! Let me know what you think in the comments below.

P.S. Spacebar is the button you use to fire. You can also use your mouse to adjust velocity and angle if you wish.

Last Updated: May 27, 2015

55 Comments

  1. JISSSSSS!!! THE MOTHER OF ALL GAMES!!!

    Reply

  2. Lord Chaos

    May 27, 2015 at 10:31

    And…. there goes the rest of my week.

    Reply

    • Admiral Chief's Adventure

      May 27, 2015 at 10:31

      Ditto

      Reply

      • Lord Chaos

        May 27, 2015 at 10:32

        I remember primary school in the science lab playing this.

        Reply

  3. Admiral Chief's Adventure

    May 27, 2015 at 10:31

    This was the first game I watched, and then played

    Reply

    • Admiral Chief's Adventure

      May 27, 2015 at 10:36

      On second thought, it could have been something else most likely. HOWEVER, this game was the first one to have a lasting impact on my memory

      Reply

      • Lord Chaos

        May 27, 2015 at 10:38

        With the amount of comments you’re making you might be flagged as a spambot. 😛

        Reply

        • Admiral Chief's Adventure

          May 27, 2015 at 10:39

          Good thing it is me that moderates the spambots then

          Reply

          • Lord Chaos

            May 27, 2015 at 10:40

            Ahh!!! Spambot moderator. O_o

            *Runs

          • Admiral Chief's Adventure

            May 27, 2015 at 10:42

            *Edits LC’s comment to something about ponies and man-diapers

          • Lord Chaos

            May 27, 2015 at 10:43

            Do you want Dutch to flirt with me?

          • Admiral Chief's Adventure

            May 27, 2015 at 10:44

            I see that as a “social experiment”

            [takes notes of the test subjects]

          • Lord Chaos

            May 27, 2015 at 10:52

            *Subject flips the bird.

          • Admiral Chief's Adventure

            May 27, 2015 at 10:59

            Interesting. Most curious behaviour.
            [makes additional notes]

            Further tests required!

  4. Admiral Chief's Adventure

    May 27, 2015 at 10:31

    FUNKY BOMB

    Reply

  5. Admiral Chief's Adventure

    May 27, 2015 at 10:32

    I used to be productive at work, then I took a Scorched Earth to the productivity knee

    Reply

  6. Admiral Chief's Adventure

    May 27, 2015 at 10:33

    Heh, dat tosser

    Reply

    • Lord Chaos

      May 27, 2015 at 11:06

      I so badly want to cross the line on this comment. 🙁

      Reply

      • Admiral Chief's Adventure

        May 27, 2015 at 11:07

        Yes, tell me what your plans/feelings are. You are a curious research subject indeed!

        Reply

        • Lord Chaos

          May 27, 2015 at 11:11

          I’m not curious, I’m very solidly on the side of liking women.

          Reply

          • Admiral Chief's Adventure

            May 27, 2015 at 11:16

            Interesting. Subject misinterprets comment and goes on the defensive.

            MORE TESTS!

          • Lord Chaos

            May 27, 2015 at 11:18

            *Subject dies due to lack of feeding.

            HA. 😛

          • Admiral Chief's Adventure

            May 27, 2015 at 11:20

            [Applies serum 521]
            Hmmm, tissue regeneration seems stable. The tail appendige seems to be a new development…
            [Makes additional notes]

          • Lord Chaos

            May 27, 2015 at 11:20

            Whoot, now I have two waggly things. 😀

          • Admiral Chief's Adventure

            May 27, 2015 at 11:22

            [Observes subject’s facination with small things]

          • Lord Chaos

            May 27, 2015 at 11:26

            Attempts to split atom.

          • Lord Chaos

            May 27, 2015 at 11:27

            *Subject goes to Lunch meeting.

          • Admiral Chief's Adventure

            May 27, 2015 at 11:41

            [Sends observer drone to continue studies]

          • Lord Chaos

            May 27, 2015 at 12:57

            *Brings drone back.

            Don’t worry, it’s just beer dripping from it.

          • Admiral Chief's Adventure

            May 27, 2015 at 13:02

            Just wash your hands 😛

  7. Rock789

    May 27, 2015 at 10:40

    Many an hour lost in Computer Science classes at school playing this and Gorillaz (same thing, just gorillas tossing exploding bananas at each other) instead of programming… Good times! 🙂

    Reply

  8. Krabby Paddy

    May 27, 2015 at 10:59

    Loved this!!! Wow such good memories … of pissing friends off.

    Reply

  9. Hammersteyn

    May 27, 2015 at 11:00

    *Life Avoidance Wednesday

    Reply

  10. PoisonedBelial

    May 27, 2015 at 11:08

    I loved this game so much.

    And then I got a fast computer and I didn’t love the game as much.

    That said, if I was told I could only have a 486DX and this was the only game I could play, I’d be happier than a pig in sh*t.

    Reply

    • Admiral Chief's Adventure

      May 27, 2015 at 11:15

      ^This

      Reply

  11. GooseZA

    May 27, 2015 at 11:13

    I loved this game back in the day. Nice work!

    Reply

  12. Weanerdog

    May 27, 2015 at 11:16

    I spotted this on Archive.org last night and managed to resist. But twice in 24 hours it must be a sign.

    I hit the link and see that I was not the only one searching for nostalgia last night.

    Reply

    • Admiral Chief's Adventure

      May 27, 2015 at 11:18

      I believe so dude, give in!

      Reply

  13. ReaperOfSquirrels

    May 27, 2015 at 11:17

    The amount of hours put into this game as a kid… OMG!

    There have been people trying to make games similar to this… but none came close.

    Reply

    • Admiral Chief's Adventure

      May 27, 2015 at 11:18

      I rather liked the simplistic pocket tanks, for a quickie

      Reply

      • ReaperOfSquirrels

        May 27, 2015 at 11:20

        I… ummmm… errrr…

        NOPE!

        O.O

        Reply

  14. ReaperOfSquirrels

    May 27, 2015 at 11:19

    OMG Disqus WHY!? I don’t want to read my notifications in another tab. Go back to how you were!

    Reply

  15. Matthew Holliday

    May 27, 2015 at 11:22

    why would anyone choose this over soldat?

    Reply

  16. V@mp

    May 27, 2015 at 11:24

    Scorched Earth – A youth well waisted 🙂

    Reply

  17. Axon1988

    May 27, 2015 at 11:46

    I have a small game on my phone called pocket tanks. Almost exactly the same as this classic. It’s great for wasting time while waiting on food at a restaurant. The wife and I would usually resolve arguments through pocket tanks.

    Reply

    • Admiral Chief's Adventure

      May 27, 2015 at 11:57

      Haha, I know pocket tanks well, was not aware that it is on mobile, TIME TO DOWNLOAD

      Reply

      • Axon1988

        May 27, 2015 at 12:11

        I have it on Windows phone. Not sure if it is available on other platforms. We play it over wifi as well.

        Reply

  18. Thats_how_I_Troll

    May 27, 2015 at 12:23

    And here is the grandfather of all those type of games:

    http://www.play.vg/games/185Gorillas%20QBasic%20in%20Flash.html

    Reply

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