Home Entertainment The enemy may have a missile but we have a new trailer for MACHETE KILLS!

The enemy may have a missile but we have a new trailer for MACHETE KILLS!

58 second read


As we all know, Machete don’t text. But Danny Trejo’s crater-faced, mustachioed federale is a man of the times, and so he now uses his phone for much more modern applications. Like stabbing people.

He’s going to have to upgrade if he means to take on a scenery chewing Mel Gibson (he has a missile pointed at Washington – how’s that for a simple plot?) with his army of supersoldiers, like Sofia Vergara (and her double-D’s), Antonio Banderas, Demian Bichir and Cuba Gooding Jr. Did I say Cuba Gooding Jr? I meant Lady Gaga. Easy mistake to make, once you’ve seen this new trailer.

Danny Trejo returns as ex-Federale agent Machete, who is recruited by the President of the United States for a mission which would be impossible for any mortal man – he must take down a madman revolutionary and an eccentric billionaire arms dealer who has hatched a plan to spread war and anarchy across the planet.

Machete Kills will be kicking some ass on October 11, 2013.

Last Updated: August 5, 2013


  1. Trejo is clocking on, hes about 70 now.

    Our “action heroes/villians” are getting old, (See RED/Expendables), where are the new guys?


    • TiMsTeR1033

      August 5, 2013 at 10:31

      The rock is our only hope…. so sad really. hell even he is getting old. and buffer with every movie.


      • Sageville

        August 5, 2013 at 11:35

        Yup, I smell what ur cooking.


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Check Also

“Let’s get it!” Hilarious new “early access” trailer for The Suicide Squads sneaks online

A brand new trailer for The Suicide Squad has taken a very unorthodox road online, but now…