Trailer Breakdown – GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY

5 min read
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The first trailer for Guardians of the Galaxy finally arrived yesterday, and it looked daaaaaaamn good. Thing is though, this is a brand new property for Marvel and Disney, and quite a few folks are going to miss out on several details that were glimpsed in those two and half minutes.

Fortunately, we have eagle eyes here. So here’s the trailer, broken down into important space-chunks.

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While I’m betting money that the film will open up with a young Peter Quill AKA Star Lord getting his ass abducted off of Earth, the trailer is laready looking at the man he’ll eventually become, as played by Chriss Pratt. Who might also be moonlighting as a tomb raider now.

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We’ve already seen two infinity gems, the Tesseract and the Aether, so is this the third one? Well Quill wants to know as well, but unfortunately…

 

 

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…Djimon Hounsou as Korath the Pursuer has some other ideas in mind, demanding that Star Lord drop it.

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…Who? Great moment there, setting up Chris Pratt as the legend that he wishes to be.

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A quick glimpse of Quill donning his Kree helmet, which helps him become more effective in combat, plus his two snazzy pistols. Someone is looking to get hurt!

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We call this the Capaldi-stare moment, only with more abs.

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Han Solo, eat your heart out. Pratt may just be the next loveable rogue in space as he pulls off some tricks in the Milano spaceship.

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Marvel and Disney are clearly throwing a lot of effort into this movie, because the technology and alien environments look stunning.

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Kurt Russel may be on the other side of that gate to the stars.

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A trillion light years away from home, and Pratt does what all humans do best: Piss people off.

 

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Next up, Drax the Destroyer. A former human himself, the chap was rebuilt and motivated by one single goal in life: Kill Thanos, who was glimpsed at the end of the first Avengers movie. He’s big, has an impossible amount of muscles, and likes to fight with knives. In other words, he comes from space-Benoni

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He really, really likes fighting with knives.

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Alien blood everywhere, except this time, it ain’t acidic.

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Jirre boet, how much do you klap when you escape from prison?

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Swapping blue skin for a shade of green, Zoe Saldana plays the most dangerous lady in the cosmos. She’s pretty much a homicidal maniac, and she;s damn good at it as well.

 

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Obligatory romantic sub-plot senses, tingling! Seriously though, she’s got more in common with Peter Quill than she realises. They’re both stranded, Quill is the only human for light years around and Gamora is the last of her species. They’ve both got a grudge against the alien Badoon race, but she’s got training from Thanos that makes her especially formidable.

 

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Plus the God Sword, mustn’t forget that. It’s one of the toughest blades in the universe, and it can give even ol’ Logan himself a run for his money. In this scene, it looks like Gamora is going one on one with Nebula.

 

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Even though he doesn’t speak in this trailer, I’ve got a feeling that Bradley Cooper’s Rocket Raccoon is going to steal the show.

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Because how the hell do you top a Raccoon with guns?

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And then there’s Groot, a combat house-plant. I’m quite eager to hear Vin Diesel say the exact same word over and over again actually, because ass-kick reasons.

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GROOT!

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GROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT!

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Come along Pond. That’s Karen Gillian sans any hair and some extra make-up as Nebula, a pirate with a sadistic streak and an ambition to come out on top. Damn fine work on the make-up of this character, I have to say.

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And it looks like she has a score to settle with Gamora.

 

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Introduced in the end-credits sequence of Thor: The Dark World, Benecio Del Toro plays the Collector AKA the weirdest f***ing guy in the universe. He already has two infinity gems, and he has his eyes set on the rest of the collection.

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Judging by the way that Drax is getting man-handled here, I’d say that this is our first fleeting glimpse of the Kree heavyweight enforcer, Ronan the Accuser. LET’S GET READY TO RUMBLE!

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Good ol’ John C Reilly. He plays Nova Corps Centurion Rhomman Dey, the law and order of the universe, while Peter Serafinowicz plays his second-in-command who happens to hate A-holes.

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Man, I love the Nova Corp armour. It looks fantastic, and perfectly grounded in space-reality.

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I also love Quill’s ship, the Milano. That’s some beautiful CGI there as it takes on Ronan’s Necrocraft over the Nova Corp homeworld of Xandar.

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OOGA CHAKKA OOGA OOGA CHAKKA!

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I’m sold. August can’t come soon enough for me, to see Guardians of the Galaxy.

 

Last Updated: February 20, 2014

Darryn Bonthuys

Something wrong gentlemen? You come here prepared to read the words of a madman, and instead found a lunatic obsessed with comics, Batman and Raul Julia's M Bison performance in the 1994 Street Fighter movie? Fine! Keep your bio! In fact, now might be a good time to pray to it!

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