The laws of attraction are a strange thing when you think about them. There’s no steadfast rule on or what we can fall in love with, as the chemicals in our brains give us a jolt of romance whenever we’re in the presence of a high school sweetheart, a random encounter from Tinder or even a body pillow of Raphtalia-chan from Rising of the Shield Hero.
Not that I’m in love with the only object in the universe that doesn’t scream when I’m near it, but I’ll tell you what I truly do wish I could romance: The anal-searing collection of fried chicken made famous by a certain Colonel from Kentucky. If you happen to have an appreciation for the food which leaves your toilet looking like a Jackson Pollock art installation after you’ve said farewell to it and you want to take that passion to a spicy new level, then good news!
Kentucky Fried Chicken have officially announced a dating sim that’ll allow you to court their infamous mascot, which goes by the name of I Love You, Colonel Sanders! A Finger Lickin’ Good Dating Simulator. Here’s a trailer for it and a brief description that I promise that I’m not making up:
From the same people who brought you the bucket of chicken, comes the world’s first Colonel Sanders dating simulator.
I Love You, Colonel Sanders! A Finger Lickin’ Good Dating Simulator follows you, a promising culinary student, as you try to date your classmate, Colonel Sanders. Throughout your journey, you’ll be faced with life-changing decisions that will affect your chances of friendship and love. But be careful! Your choices have real consequences with real animated characters’ feelings at stake.
Do you have what it takes to survive culinary school? Will Colonel Sanders choose you to be his business partner? Or maybe even so much more? Find out in the most finger lickin’ good dating simulator ever created—a game that KFC actually made.
According to KFC, you’ll be able to mingle with several characters including cooking Corgi so everyone else doesn’t even matter, there’ll be actual cooking battles and yes you can date anime Colonel Sanders:
- 9 lovable characters
- Multiple hours of play-through
- Dateable Colonel Sanders
- A secret ending! Shh!
- Secret recipes! Double Shh!
- Cooking battles
- Battle battles
- Earn a degree from a fictional culinary school
- 11 Herbs and Spices
- Cute miniature food
- Officially created by KFC. No, really
I Love You, Colonel Sanders! A Finger Lickin’ Good Dating Simulator will be out on September 24 and considering that my blood type is literally Dunked Zinger Wing sauce at this point in my life, I’m kind of interested in it.
Last Updated: September 11, 2019
Alien Emperor Trevor
September 11, 2019 at 08:30
9 lovable characters
And here I was hoping for 11 hearts and spiciness.
Admiral Chief
September 11, 2019 at 08:30
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Pariah
September 11, 2019 at 08:38
This really is so universally applicable.
Llama In The Rift
September 11, 2019 at 08:38
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Admiral Chief
September 11, 2019 at 08:47
She love dat cheeecken long long time
HairyEwok
September 11, 2019 at 10:13
Is…. is that a JoJo character i spot!
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HvR
September 11, 2019 at 10:22
Did someone say “cooking Corgi”?
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Stoompot
September 11, 2019 at 07:51
I’ve got more of a man crush on John Walker ❤
SagatatiaRZA
September 11, 2019 at 07:52
Okay this is peak corporate meme’ing. I thought Wendy’s had the monopoly on meme food but Jesus Christ
HvR
September 11, 2019 at 10:13
Now you are dragging Chick-fil-A into this as well?
SagatatiaRZA
September 11, 2019 at 12:11
Oops! Guess no gay-dating The Colonel now.
Pariah
September 11, 2019 at 08:02
It was at this point that Pariah had decided to rethink her hobby. Or perhaps the internet was simply corrupting her view of the world. Maybe it was fate. In the end, the only thing that mattered is that on this day she was ashamed to be labelled a gamer – simply because this abomination now existed.
HvR
September 11, 2019 at 10:22
Nah no reason to be ashamed.
I you were to be in the social media marketing industry…..
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miaau
September 12, 2019 at 16:24
Nah, they’ve been making dodgy chicken for simply bloody ages now. No need to get bent out of shape about it