Home Gaming $150 000 required to bug Valve into making Half-Life 3

$150 000 required to bug Valve into making Half-Life 3

2 min read
13

Gaben

It’s no secret that the world is eagerly awaiting Half-Life 3. When will we be getting it though? Valve have been tight lipped, not giving any indication as to what their plans are. It’s been seven long years since gamers last klapped things with a crowbar in HL2: Episode 2, and it’s making them crazy. How crazy you ask? Well, a pair of interns are looking to raise $150 000 to get Valve’s attention. Sorry did I say attention? I mean harass. They want $150 000 to harass them.

The Campaign

The two interns, Chris Salem and Kyle Mazzie, have started a Indiegogo campaign with the following milestones (via VG247):

$3000 – AdWord Campaign

The goal behind this tier is to target the 300 Valve employees with a Google AdWord campaign. If any staff member searches their name in the engine, they will see a simple advert on the side stating “we want Half-Life 3”

$9000 – Mobile Billboard

A mobile billboard will be rented and plastered with a logo and message saying “We-Want 3”. That vehicle will then spend and entire day driving around Valve HQ.

$45 000 – Gabe Newell Look-a-Likes

This is easily the most bizarre of all the goals. If reached, a whole lot of Gabe Newell lookalikes will be hired and kitted out with “We-Want HL3” shirts, then tasked with walking around Valve HQ. The whole thing will then be filmed for the whole world to see.

$150 000 – A concert

If reached, a huge Half-Life concert will be held, and all the Valve employees will be invited. The music lineup will feature some of the biggest names in video game music.

The Video

If you were too lazy to read everything above, you can watch this video instead.

If you’re interested, you can donate anything from $1 (for good karma) up to $3000 for a song about you written by JJ Lewis. At time of writing, $1057 has been raised with 29 days to go.

Thoughts?

I know this is meant to be in good fun. It does really seem to border on harassing Valve’s employees though. Do they really need a reminder that Half-Life 3 isn’t out yet? I’m sure they have plans. Whether those include releasing the game or not, it really is none of our business.

Personally, and I am sure I have written this several times, I think Valve are working on an Orange Box 2. It will include a shiny new Source engine, Half-Life 3, Portal 3, Team Fortress 3, and Left 4 Dead 3. I would say Dota 3 too, but that seems silly and unnecessary as the game isn’t even 100% complete yet (there are still some missing heroes).

If for some odd reason I am correct, each of those titles would require a huge amount of work and polish to meet Valve standards. I’d like to think they are gearing up for some big reveal in the next few years. Will it meet all the hype we’ve built up? Probably not. It will still be damn awesome though.

Last Updated: October 20, 2014

13 Comments

  1. Urg. That’s just creepy.

    Reply

  2. Admiral Chief 0

    October 20, 2014 at 12:03

    A worthy cause, most noble, brings a tear to my eye!

    Reply

  3. Cadis Etrama Di Umar

    October 20, 2014 at 12:04

  4. RinceThis

    October 20, 2014 at 12:10

    Again. Planet Earth 0 Morons 1.

    Reply

    • Dutch Matrix

      October 20, 2014 at 12:19

      That plot line to Hatred now making a bit more sense? #StirringTheShit

      Reply

  5. Kensei Seraph - Staff

    October 20, 2014 at 12:31

    I hope that any additional proceeds from the concert go towards a charity of some kind. A proper charity, not the HL3 or back-pocket charities.

    Reply

  6. Sir Rants A Lot Llew

    October 20, 2014 at 12:44

    Lol. You gotta admit it’s funny. However I do think a court would find the adWord spamming to be harassment though and I would tread carefully.

    Reply

  7. Hammersteyn

    October 20, 2014 at 12:44

    It’s beautiful. Valve keeps HL3 hostage for so long that people are willing to pay interns money so that they hassle Gabe to release it. So even if a single line of code hasn’t been written yet the game could already show a profit of $150 000 – expenses for said concert. Plus it’s still not a guarantee that we see HL3 any time soon

    Reply

  8. Sir Rants A Lot Llew

    October 20, 2014 at 12:48

    How Valve plans to make money:

    1) Make people want HL3
    2) Get interns to rake in cash for campaign to make HL3
    3) Don’t release HL3
    4) ???
    5) Profit

    Reply

  9. Gareth L (That eXCheez Guy)

    October 21, 2014 at 14:11

    There’s no way that Half-life 3 could live up to all the hype. HL2 wasn’t actually *that* good in the end, lets be honest. I’m even playing it again at the moment and although it’s really polished, it’s really boring and empty emotionally.

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Check Also

Valve had ‘multiple’ Half-Life 3 projects that couldn’t bridge Valve’s desire for art to collide with technology

Half-Life 2’s episodic series was meant to flesh the world out further, to drive home the …