Darryn is just desperate for a Mister Stabby novelisation but he doesn’t understand that his beloved childhood knife doesn’t work as a kids book.

Assassin’s Creed Odyssey is one of my favourite games from last year, and I spent dozens of hours role playing as my own idealised, ass-kicking version of Kassandra. The game was always sold as being about player choice, with even the character’s gender being an option; a first for an Assassin’s Creed game. For the most part, the game let players play whoever they liked, letting them forge hetero and homosexual relationships with abandon. The game’s latest DLC however, forced players into a cisnormative relationship for the sake of procreation – and many players weren’t happy about it

One of the biggest of several changes that this year’s Assassin’s Creed Odyssey makes is that it lets players choose to play as a male or female hero. From soon after the prologue, players can choose to play the game either as Alexios or Kassandra (and we reckon you’re going to want to play as Kassandra). It’s not the first …

Are you Team Kassandra or Team Alexios? If you haven't made up your mind yet, here are five compelling reasons why you should choose the female protagonist option when Ancient-Greece-set Assassin's Creed Odyssey releases on 5 October.