Hellboy is getting an R-rated reboot on the big screen

3 min read
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Hellboy (1)

Guys, it’s time for a few harsh truths: We’re all going to die eventually, Bovril will always be better than Marmite and your mom is a lovely person who doesn’t deserve to be the focus of so many yo momma jokes. Also, Hellboy 3 is never happening. Ever. And that’s good! Because while the dream of ever seeing Ron Perlman walking around in enough red paint to scare the most ardent capitalist is a pipe dream, it also frees the franchise up for a fresh new take.

A reboot that Hellboy creator Mike Mignola himself has confirmed. Here’s the text from the FaceBook post, for extra proof:

Hellboy (3)

Okay, here’s some news–
There IS going to be another HELLBOY MOVIE.
It’s going to be an R rated reboot directed by Neil Marshall (The Descent, Game Of Thrones) and staring David Harbour (Stranger Things) as Hellboy.
More news to come soon–

That’s some amazing talent right there. If you’ve never seen The Descent, you’ve missed out on one of the finest horror movies ever made. Dark, foreboding and utterly hellish on its characters. All qualities that sound perfect for a more visceral take on Hellboy. Now don’t get me wrong, I absolutely adore Guillermo Del Toro’s original vision, which comes off as the kind of twisted fairy tale that you’d read to a red-headed stepchild, but perhaps this change in tone is the breath of fresh air needed to keep Hellboy relevant.

According to The Hollywood Reporter, this reboot means that you won’t see Del Toro present to help produce, while Ron Perlman himself won’t be donning the infamous right hand of doom either. A pity, but maybe it’s all for the best. I’m cautiously optimistic about this, because you know how the old saying goes: Believe half of what you see and none of what you hear.

Read  Gaze upon Mondo’s beautiful SDCC posters

All I’m suggesting, is that perhaps the excitement for a new Hellboy film needs to be tempered somewhat until we finally get some footage of a demon having its face rearranged by a few rounds from a Samaritan hand cannon. Still, cautiously optimistic. Whatever Marshall and Harbour have planned for this new flick, I’m keen to see how much different it looks from the world that Del Toro and his crew created so many years ago.

Last Updated: May 9, 2017

  • Original Heretic

    I needed some good news today after having my laptop and PS4 stolen last night.

    This is probably as good as it’ll get for me today.

    • Alien Emperor Trevor

      Noooo! What happened?

      • Original Heretic

        Fuckers broke into my house last night, while we were sleeping. Climbed up onto our first floor balcony, using my son’s swing to get up there.
        We’re safe, that is most important.
        But damn….my laptop….so much information on there…..irreplaceable shit.

        • Alien Emperor Trevor

          Really sorry to hear that, glad you’re all okay.

          • Original Heretic

            @johnambitious:disqus
            Thanks guys.

            Yeah, it’s a super kak one. No gaming for me until I get an insurance pay out.

            I’m having American History X fantasies. If I ever had to find the assholes that did this, I’d make him bite the curb.

        • Captain JJ

          Shit man, that’s terrible.

        • Skyblue

          Cloud storage bud. It’s free these days and anything even remotely important should be stored there. At least your PS4 profile can be retrieved and most importantly your family is safe.

    • Hammersteyn

      Ag no man 🙁

    • For the Emperor!

      Good luck man, glad you guys are safe.

      • Original Heretic

        Thanks man.

    • Admiral Chief

      WTAF dude

      • Captain JJ

        What the all fuck?

        • Original Heretic

          Seems appropriate to me.
          As far as my gaming in concerned, it was an all fuck.

          • Captain JJ

            Yea man. That’s really shite.

        • Lu

          *Actual

    • VampyreSquirrel

      Sorry to hear about that man.

    • Lu

      That sucks man. Hope the bastards get Squirrel AIDS.

    • shame dude

    • Jim of the Banana

      That sucks mate 🙁 – hopefully they’re covered by your household insurance?

      • Original Heretic

        Insurance already underway, thankfully. Spent the whole afternoon running and calling around, getting quotes.
        And also upgrading security at my house.
        Me wife was SUPER paranoid, so did my best to ease her mind.

        • Jim of the Banana

          That’s the worst thing about something like that; it takes a while to feel safe again. It’s definitely a violation of your personal space.

          Best of luck with the claims, hopefully you can upgrade the laptop and get a PS4 Pro.

          • Original Heretic

            Gonna try for the Pro. Depends on what the pay out is.

            Laptop, though, well, I’m just going to go for what I can get. After getting the quotes, I saw that I was rather underinsured there.

    • Francois Knoetze

      that sucks…know the feeling dude. Sorry to hear

  • Alien Emperor Trevor

    I bet Perlman must be a bit upset. He’s always talking about Hellboy 3.

    • Original Heretic

      Yeah, but he did also always complain about having all the make up applied. Just after Hellboy 2, del Toro apparently asked him about doing 3, and Perlman’s response was just “3 hours”. The time it took to get into the get up!

      • Hammersteyn

        Gaah, what you said

      • Well Drax took 6 hours in GoTG1!

    • Hammersteyn

      Yeah, but he hated the makeup

      • Captain JJ

        And Christian Bale loved his Batman suit? 😛

        • Hammersteyn

          I heard he slept in it, like pajamas. But another example is Jennifer Lawrence. She had the same issues with playing Mystique

          • Captain JJ

            Must be damn tough to get paid millions and the worst thing is to wake up early and put on a superhero suit.

          • Hammersteyn

            Inorite? Those damned overprivileged multi millionaires

          • Original Heretic

            Yeah, but honestly, going through a long make up process is super shit.
            In the one show I did, I have to get fully painted. Took an hour every evening before the show.
            Um, see my profile pic? Yup, that’s me in full get up.
            Yes, it’s amateur hour, but hey….

          • Hammersteyn

            How much were you paid? $1 million? $2 million? Probably not, but Hollywood pays much,much more than that.

          • Original Heretic

            Like I said, amateur hour!

            I do agree with you guys, though, not saying I’m not. If you’re getting paid, you suffer through it.

            Even me, going through this process, I suffered through it because in the end, it looked really awesome on stage.
            If you want to be an entertainer, you gotta go through this shit sometimes.

          • Captain JJ
          • Original Heretic

            Yup, gotta agree there!

  • Captain JJ

    Interesting, but man Perlman was good as Hellboy. Though David is an excellent actor, so I do think we could be seeing something special here.

    • Original Heretic

      He was great, but I also wonder if he might not be a bit too old these days to really give horns the way he was able to in the other movies. I mean, he’s pushing 70.

    • Jim of the Banana

      Agreed! The hellboy movies are definitely some of my favourite comicbook movies.

  • Hammersteyn

    David Harbour?
    *Swooooooooooons

    • Original Heretic

      I like the choice, a lot.
      He’s got that awesome deep voice, the kind you expect Hellboy to have.
      Well, the kind we want him to have after Perlman made the character his own.

      • Skyblue

        I hope so as I have no reference point for Hellboy other than del Toro and Perlman’s work.

  • For the Emperor!

    Just hope Ron Perlman gets a small cameo 🙂

  • Admiral Chief

    So, red penis?

    • Hammersteyn

      *Red rocket

      • Original Heretic

        Chewbacca style!

        • Hammersteyn

          XD

  • HvR

    Yeah no more Selma Blair with the acting ability of a shopping mall mannequin.

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