Going to kak themselves soon. I rather enjoyed Alien: Isolation, and I think any fan of Ridley Scott’s original film will appreciate it just as much. It’s tense, it’s gruelling and it has a lady hero tough enough to rival Ellen Ripley. We’re giving away a swanky hamper consisting of the game and its associated merchandise to a lucky winner. Here’ s who that winner is.
Sorry Llew. I know you really, really, really wanted to win this one. but the winner this time is:
Reinhardt Pienaar, who’ll soon get to experience the claustrophobic terror of being stuck in a vent while a great big phallic alien tries to eat suck your face off, like some seaside tourist sucking a mussel out of a shell. I have no idea where I was going with that. Anyway, we’ll be in contact soon to get your details, you lucky human being. Well, relatively lucky. You’ll feel like less of a winner when you;’re lying foetal under your desk because like a skinny white girl who only counts in odd numbers, you just can’t even.
Thanks to SEGA and Ster-Kinekor for the prizes. Thanks to Creative Assembly for finally making a good Alien game. Thanks to you guys for entering, and reading our stuff.
Last Updated: October 16, 2014
Lupus
October 16, 2014 at 14:32
I am on the list, it is a start. Pity it’s not number 1
McFancypants HD 3.0
October 16, 2014 at 14:33
I didn’t win! Hot damn! :D/
http://www.gifbin.com/bin/50yuyu29839.gif
Cadis Etrama Di Umar
October 16, 2014 at 14:35
Well done to the winner. My condolences to your anus
Mossel
October 16, 2014 at 15:01
My rectum is ready.
Captain JJ in the shadow
October 16, 2014 at 15:03
Never again will we question where your handle comes from.
Spaffy
October 16, 2014 at 15:03
rofl nice one
Mossel
October 16, 2014 at 15:07
This is a family site. Mossels are tasty molluscs. That is all we need to know.
Skoobaz
October 16, 2014 at 16:23
Damn ppl!!
Sageville
October 16, 2014 at 16:51
SnorMossel was taken?
Alien Emperor Trevor
October 16, 2014 at 14:35
Congrats HvR! Oh wait, random.org hates you 😀
Hammersteyn
October 16, 2014 at 14:36
LOL!
Captain JJ in the shadow
October 16, 2014 at 14:41
This is just a big “f you” from random.org to HvR
HvR
October 16, 2014 at 15:05
Nah the FU will be second on the list. Rather not be on the list than second, ….. and third and fourth and fifth…
Captain JJ in the shadow
October 16, 2014 at 15:06
You may not know it, but everyone else found it really funny. 😉
Skoobaz
October 16, 2014 at 16:23
I am feeling much the same way!
RinceThis
October 16, 2014 at 14:58
HAHAHA
Hammersteyn
October 16, 2014 at 14:37
http://img-9gag-lol.9cache.com/photo/aj69158_460sa.gif
Cadis Etrama Di Umar
October 16, 2014 at 14:40
LOL!!! I love this man so much. Miss this show…
Hammersteyn
October 16, 2014 at 14:42
Him and Channing Tatum are doing a new movie together and it’s not a comedy called Foxcatcher
Cadis Etrama Di Umar
October 16, 2014 at 14:44
NOT a comedy?? :O ….. Well, that’s interesting
Hammersteyn
October 16, 2014 at 14:44
Based on a true story. I really wanna see it.
Cadis Etrama Di Umar
October 16, 2014 at 14:47
Yeah, I’m actually intrigued. But they’re both good at comedy, so I’m kinda disappointed too
Grant [_G_] Hancock
October 16, 2014 at 15:30
Looks intense !
RinceThis
October 16, 2014 at 14:59
Looks awesome. Based on the real-life story of two brothers who are olympic wrestlers.
Cadis Etrama Di Umar
October 16, 2014 at 15:02
Sweet, def gonna look into it
RinceThis
October 16, 2014 at 15:02
Also been getting rave reviews from the festivals it’s been shown at, some say Oscar material…
Hammersteyn
October 16, 2014 at 15:23
Oscar material Comedies. Steve Carell took note
Captain JJ in the shadow
October 16, 2014 at 15:26
Don’t tell Oscar that. I have a feeling he can’t take jokes. (too soon?)
Hammersteyn
October 16, 2014 at 15:26
What about knock knock jokes?
Captain JJ in the shadow
October 16, 2014 at 15:27
lol
Captain JJ in the shadow
October 16, 2014 at 14:47
So it’s not a comedy and it’s not called Foxcatcher.
Strange. Why would you even mention it then? 😛
Hammersteyn
October 16, 2014 at 14:49
XD silly me.
Admiral Chief 0
October 16, 2014 at 14:42
BWAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA
Hammersteyn
October 16, 2014 at 14:40
Congrats Reinhardt. I will stalk your home much like the alien stalks you in the game………………….. where do you live again? 😀
Captain JJ in the shadow
October 16, 2014 at 14:41
The only good thing about the fact that I missed this competition is that I’m not disappointed in not winning it.
Admiral Chief 0
October 16, 2014 at 14:41
MOSSSSSSSEL!!!!!!!!!!!
Mossel
October 16, 2014 at 14:58
Ah man! This is fantastic!!
Captain JJ in the shadow
October 16, 2014 at 14:59
Where do you live again? Huehuehue
Admiral Chief 0
October 16, 2014 at 14:42
“like some seaside tourist sucking a mussel out of a shell”
Huehuehue
Hammersteyn
October 16, 2014 at 14:43
“Thanks to you guys for entering, and reading our stuff.” Well I dare say for most it’s one out of two
GooseZA
October 16, 2014 at 14:45
Damnit Geoff. I told you my cheque was in the mail!
Spaffy
October 16, 2014 at 14:47
“The winner of the Alien: Isolation hamper is… going too kak themselves”
This is why I love Lazygamer so much 😀
Thanx guys
PointMan
October 16, 2014 at 14:48
Gota love SA lingo.
Captain JJ in the shadow
October 16, 2014 at 14:49
At least when someone hears you scream like a girl when you’re playing this you can just use the line: “I’m just getting into character.”
Alien Emperor Trevor
October 16, 2014 at 14:52
And what do you normally say?
Rainman
October 16, 2014 at 14:58
That he thought someone broke in through the bathroom window?
Alien Emperor Trevor
October 16, 2014 at 14:59
ohhhhhhh!
Spaffy
October 16, 2014 at 14:59
Too soon? lol
Captain JJ in the shadow
October 16, 2014 at 14:58
“Rince impression.”
RinceThis
October 16, 2014 at 15:00
Pass the salt?
Captain JJ in the shadow
October 16, 2014 at 15:01
LOL
Alien Emperor Trevor
October 16, 2014 at 15:09
SHUT IT!
Mossel
October 16, 2014 at 14:57
Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am the winaaaaaaaaaaaar!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Spaffy
October 16, 2014 at 14:59
Congrats man. Hope you have diapers
Hammersteyn
October 16, 2014 at 15:22
HAI!
Captain JJ in the shadow
October 16, 2014 at 15:23
Hai! (you started it now)
Admiral Chief 0
October 16, 2014 at 15:23
HAI HAI HAI
CAE9872
October 16, 2014 at 15:31
Enjoy and let us know how it turned out…or whether it turned you out!
Mossel
October 16, 2014 at 15:40
Sitting patiently behind my desk staring at my cellphone and refreshing my emails…
Mossel
October 16, 2014 at 15:00
I would just like to take this time to thank everyone at Lazygamer, Ster Kinekor and Sega for this awesome prize!! This is the first time in my life I am winning something and it’s freaking amazing!
Captain JJ in the shadow
October 16, 2014 at 15:00
It is. Congrats man.
RinceThis
October 16, 2014 at 15:01
You may regret those words when blood is flowing from your ears! 😉 Well done man! Enjoy!
Mossel
October 16, 2014 at 15:04
I should get a webcam and share with the world what a little bitch I am with these horror games.
Spaffy
October 16, 2014 at 15:09
I’d subscribe to that
Captain JJ in the shadow
October 16, 2014 at 15:10
Seconded
I considered recording myself playing The Forest, but I look like a ghoul when my eyeliner is running.
Admiral Chief 0
October 16, 2014 at 15:12
HA!
Mossel
October 16, 2014 at 15:21
hahaha! Atleast then you are ready for the black parade.
Admiral Chief 0
October 16, 2014 at 15:21
WHEN HE WAS….A YOUNG BOY……
Captain JJ in the shadow
October 16, 2014 at 15:22
At least I’ve had a beard since I could walk.
Admiral Chief 0
October 16, 2014 at 15:23
So you had a beard for 3 years now?
😛
Captain JJ in the shadow
October 16, 2014 at 15:25
Three and a half.
Admiral Chief 0
October 16, 2014 at 15:28
Magnificent!
Alien Emperor Trevor
October 16, 2014 at 15:57
You must miss the circus.
CAE9872
October 16, 2014 at 15:32
That’s what Twitch is for…you already have a good few people here happy to watch your terror.
Admiral Chief 0
October 16, 2014 at 15:03
You deserve it dude!
Captain JJ in the shadow
October 16, 2014 at 15:04
No he doesn’t. Damn it man. This is how you breed windgat people.
I got your back Mossel.
Kikmi
October 16, 2014 at 15:08
Congrat dude
Hammersteyn
October 16, 2014 at 15:21
Well now I know your real name at least 😛
Alien Emperor Trevor
October 16, 2014 at 15:56
dun dun DUN
PointMan
October 16, 2014 at 15:03
Hey how sure are we that the random.org bot didn’t make a typo? That extra 0 in my position went to the wrong person.
Admiral Chief 0
October 16, 2014 at 15:03
I’m SUPER glad it is a regular that won!
Captain JJ in the shadow
October 16, 2014 at 15:04
Me too.
Spaffy
October 16, 2014 at 15:15
That’s a victory in itself
Admiral Chief 0
October 16, 2014 at 15:19
Aye, I can rest easy
Skoobaz
October 16, 2014 at 16:27
I thought I might qualify….* SOBS *
Mossel
October 16, 2014 at 15:05
haha “like some seaside tourist sucking a mussel out of a shell”
Admiral Chief 0
October 16, 2014 at 15:12
XD, when Geoff told me, I told him he HAD to make a mossel reference!
Johan du Preez
October 16, 2014 at 15:15
lol well played.
Johan du Preez
October 16, 2014 at 15:09
random.org officially hates me 🙁
Grats on the winner.
Spaffy
October 16, 2014 at 15:13
random.org hates alot of people
Admiral Chief 0
October 16, 2014 at 15:13
WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY IS GRANT ON THE LIST???
😛
ITnexo
October 16, 2014 at 15:19
Again….
Hammersteyn
October 16, 2014 at 16:46
hahaha that little asshole
http://www.gifbin.com/bin/102010/1287507817_kid-blows-girls-candles.gif
Admiral Chief 0
October 16, 2014 at 15:20
http://static0.ad.nl/static/photo/2008/0/3/9/media_xl_745674.jpg
Captain JJ in the shadow
October 16, 2014 at 15:22
You can’t put that up on a family site.
Admiral Chief 0
October 16, 2014 at 15:30
Of course I can, what I cannot do, is tell you what your interpretation of it should/shouldn’t be
Spaffy
October 16, 2014 at 15:35
o_0
Viking Of Divinity
October 16, 2014 at 15:28
So close…..
ReaperOfSquirrels
October 16, 2014 at 15:30
Congrats Mossel!
ReaperOfSquirrels
October 16, 2014 at 15:31
Dat List… I not on it.
Hammersteyn
October 16, 2014 at 16:45
Feels all around bud.
Grant [_G_] Hancock
October 16, 2014 at 15:32
Woohoo ! Top 20 !
Hammersteyn
October 16, 2014 at 16:45
lol
CAE9872
October 16, 2014 at 15:33
I probably placed 529th…and I did enter…close! Maybe next time I can move into top 500.
Sir Rants A Lot Llew
October 17, 2014 at 06:35
Not even on the list 🙁 gratz to the winner though!
Norm (@e3zype3zy)
October 17, 2014 at 07:48
Yet again, not even in the top 20. Oh fiddlesticks.
WitWolfy
October 17, 2014 at 08:33
LOL my name wasnt even in the top 20. I have the crappiest luck!
fred
October 17, 2014 at 14:46
Ooh , one lady in the list , Hi Ronel !