I love spouting generic introductions for the weekly wrap. I write stuff, you read and give a hearty chuckle now and then, and then we go our separate ways for the weekend. Speaking of which, it’s after 12. BYE!
Nintendo doesn’t seem to get too much love these days, which is why I’m happy to see that Splatoon sold over a million units. Hooray paint all the things!
With E3 being over, it was time for the team to hand out some shiny awards. Which games did they enjoy the most? Find out right here.
Batman’s latest outing seems pretty darned amazing – if you’re not playing on PC. The Master Race port is locked to 30 frames per second, and really, really bad. To make matters worse, it got pulled off Steam! Consoles 1. PC 0.
Is your PC too old to run the Witcher 3? Don’t worry, there’s a workaround… if you don’t mind your eyes being assaulted with horrible, horrible visuals. AAAH IT BURNS!
In other random news, Rust is adding randomized penis size that will be tied to Steam ID’s (and thus, unchangeable). In other unrelated news, millions of new Steam ID’s have been created – Valve baffled as to why this has happened.
Oh, and for good measure, this:
Header of the Week
Hey Geoff, what is being compared here?
ION of the Week
Sorry, no food awards this week! I’m getting rather fond of our random day IONs to be honest – this one from Zoe made me chuckle:
Heck, I’ll even throw in my one from last Friday as a bonus:
We gave out a bunch of E3 awards earlier this week. Do you all agree with our choices? Of course not! The article has 171 comments which we ignored because we are always right… Dota 2 was obviously the best of E3!
Look at all these new Skylanders that only two people care about! Sorry D, your article has the least comments this week.
Batman of the Week
Well, this image sums up our rankings this week I guess. Geoff is Batman, Darryn is Robin, and Zoe is Batgirl. Normality has been restored!
Cabbage of the Week
Meanwhile, holding up the rest of the staff from the bottom, Alessandro and I. It pains me to say that I am the bigger cabbage. I almost tasted greatness last week, and now here I am, at the bottom. Damn!
Comment of the Week
Darryn takes his jurnalisms seriously, which is why he left no game untouched at E3. Did you read his impressions on Barbie and Her Sisters Puppy Rescue? The comment section was rather packed, leading Stosta to say this:
This article gets any more comments and Lazygamer will have to get a dedicated Barbie author.
DON’T YOU FREAKING DARE GIVE THE TEAM ANY IDEAS I AM MISERABLE ENOUGH AS IS THANK YOU VERY MUCH!
Don’t you hate it when you accidentally drop the bass during an interview?
Darryn always has something special to share each week. Here’s his latest YouTube recommendation:
BUT I HOPE YOU LEAVE ENOUGH ROOM FOR MY FIST BECAUSE I’M GONNA RAM IT INTO YOUR STOMACH!
Last Updated: June 26, 2015