Dead or Alive’s season pass is over R1000

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There’s a great trope, taken from an episode of Happy Days, called “jumping the shark” and it’s basically the point where a story loses the plot entirely and veers off into lala land. Well we’ve just hit that point with video games thanks to the season pass for Dead or Alive 5.

The season pass idea was introduced a few years ago and basically gives you full access to all the DLC that a game is going to release in the coming months and years. Developers love it because they can easily gauge how invested their consumers are in the title and story and publishers love it because… well because of money I guess.

Then the accountants got involved and figured that instead of giving someone all future DLC for a set fee they would limit it to a time period and then if people were still interested they could attempt to get the season pass purchasers to fork out more cash for extra DLC after that time period.

That was a bit of a scumbag move but it is to be expected. However what I never expected to see was a season pass being released that was not only time-limited but which was also twice the price of the game itself. Dead or Alive 5 has just done that with a new season pass that includes 79 new costumes for an incredibly eye watering $92.99. That’s $1.17 for each costume and it only includes the costumes scheduled to be released from now until E3.

Now I do get it, DOA offers a…um…visual experience that some of us may not get to experience in the real world on many occasions. However for R1000 you can

  • Go to Lollipop lounge 6 times and have R100 left for drinks
  • Go the The Grand twice with R200 left for drinks
  • Buy someone some sexy lingerie and have a good chance of seeing more than just that
  • experience 1 Special night with a classy sex worker
  • experience 15 special nights with a lady from Hillbrow
  • buy 15 tickets to see 50 Shades of Grey (you’ll find someone)

Or you know…just buying a real game and going to pornhub like every other single male on the planet. Since it was reported by Dualshockers the season pass appears to have disappeared from the internet. It’s either a glitch or they realised that they were probably ripping people off here.

[Header via Deviantart, god bless the internet]

Last Updated: February 18, 2015

Gavin Mannion

I for one welcome our future robotic overlords

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