Take a look at the kitty in the header image. Look at how big and cute those eyes are! Now go to your bank’s website, login, and prepare to make a deposit into the kitty’s account. Yes, that’s it… don’t stop to question what the hell is going on! Accept your fate and pay the kitty all your monies! DAMN YOU KITTY I AM ALREADY POOR LEAVE MY MONEY ALONE! Phew, I gotta lay off the catnip.
Best Stories
Excited to get your hands on the Divinity: Original Sin enhanced edition? What about a sequel to the hit RPG game? Divinity: Original Sin 2 got fully funded in just 12 hours! Fan’s of the franchise have lots to look forward to.
Keeping up with the successful RPG trend, it seems that the Witcher 3 has also done incredibly well. The game sold six million copies in six weeks!
Worst Stories
Poor Geoff, he had to review Devil’s Third, which as it turns out, everybody seems to hate. I don’t know when last I saw a game received that poorly!
In other horrible news, Rovio, the company behind Angry Birds, have decided that in order to move the company forward, they’re going to need to chop 260 jobs. Er… ok, that makes total sense!
Random Stories
Ever wanted to own your very own island? Now’s your chance… assuming you live in the USA. Avalanche, the developers of Just Cause 3 (not the rebel gang from Final Fantasy VII in case you were wondering), are giving away an actual island!
Thought you had the Five Nights at Freddy’s lore all figured out? YOU THOUGHT WRONG! According to Scott Cawthon, nobody knows the horrifying truth behind Freddy and his horrible animatronic buddies.
ION of the Week
I see pizza. Need I say more? Yes, I know Zoe spoke about Pepperoni, but it’s on pizza, and that’s all that matters!
Most Comments
I literally have no idea. You think the website has been acting up on the front end? Just be thankful you can’t see the back. All our awesome article stats and numbers (including a comment counter) appear to be missing!
Least Comments
Yeah same as above. Sorry… better luck next week I suppose?
Batman of the Week
Peeps, we are so very sorry for all the server crap that happened this week. Accessing the site and reading anything was an absolute pain, we know, and for this reason, you the readers are Batman this week. We wouldn’t be here without you and your support, so thank you!
Cabbage of the Week
Hey, it’s not me for a change! Oh no, cabbage of the week is none other than whoever is responsible for these random DDOS attacks. Or just the server itself, which has been an absolute vegetable! Take your pick, I don’t mind.
Header of the Week
Again, so many awesome headers this week. Where do I even begin?
Should it go to Zoe and the very credible image she chose to head her tech talk article?
Or to Geoff for his amazing Mike Tyson header for the Puzzle Quest and Magic: The Gathering getting together article?
Or to Darryn because MONTY PYTHON HEADER for his Professional Lumberjack 2016 article?
Comment of the Week
“I think it’s going to be a breakthrough for the industry. I believe it’s going to take shooters to the next level.”
No, that isn’t the comment of the week. That’s what Valhalla head and former Team Ninja Boss Tomonobu Itagaki said about Devil’s Third, a game Geoff absolutely hated. The comment of the week goes to resident reader Alien Emperor Trevor, who said the following:
Well to be fair, he didn’t specify the direction of the next level. You all assumed he meant up.
… well… damn. I never thought about it like that. It all makes sense now!
Bonus Content
Does this video even need an introduction?
(Header)
Last Updated: August 28, 2015
Admiral Chief on the mend
August 28, 2015 at 12:53
I’m BATMAN!!!
Alien Emperor Trevor
August 28, 2015 at 13:14
…
RinceThis
August 28, 2015 at 13:40
Oh, you. Always so modest!
Alien Emperor Trevor
August 28, 2015 at 13:43
But you’re also Batman!
RinceThis
August 28, 2015 at 13:44
No, it was ‘BantingMan’. Very different…
Alien Emperor Trevor
August 28, 2015 at 13:47
Last December we didn’t put up any Xmas decorations. I called it a bunting diet.
RinceThis
August 28, 2015 at 13:48
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v379/catsrluv/GIF/tumblr_lqghbh9Njm1qc268m.gif
Hammersteyn
August 28, 2015 at 13:51
Ouch! My brain
RinceThis
August 28, 2015 at 13:52
I winz!
Captain JJ Fantasticus
August 28, 2015 at 14:37
No Christmas decorations? But where did you dry out your victims?
Captain JJ Fantasticus
August 28, 2015 at 14:37
Eeuw
HvR
August 28, 2015 at 13:48
ME TOOO!!!!!!!!!!!! Better get in shape
http://media.giphy.com/media/LGckLan5nqgVO/giphy.gif
Captain JJ Fantasticus
August 28, 2015 at 14:35
WE are Batmen!
Audacity (or-das-it-eeee-eee)
August 28, 2015 at 12:56
Cheers gents and/or ladies, have a good weekend
Alien Emperor Trevor
August 28, 2015 at 13:12
I am the prettiest! I AM THE PRETTIEST!
Wait… I meant funniest…. fuck. :/
Hammersteyn
August 28, 2015 at 13:15
Telkom land line comment, was just as good. AS well as the XBOX death star one. Congrats dude.
Alien Emperor Trevor
August 28, 2015 at 13:18
Why, thank you kind sir. 😀
RinceThis
August 28, 2015 at 13:43
Don’t! Don’t FEED the monster! http://www.gifbin.com/bin/092014/reverse-1409765339_rabbits_cover_man_during_feeding_frenzy.gif
HvR
August 28, 2015 at 13:50
100 bunnies 1 cup
RinceThis
August 28, 2015 at 14:07
0_O
Hammersteyn
August 28, 2015 at 14:15
Gotta give him his due.
Captain JJ Fantasticus
August 28, 2015 at 14:39
I liked the Telkom one. Almost made me forget that Trevor is just here for the prizes
Brady miaau
August 28, 2015 at 13:44
yeah, you are.
Tell yourself, build it up. Mind training, believe, belief, dogma, it will make you. Do it.
Just be careful and never, you know, ask for validation, such as “Do you dig it?” or “Can you feel me”. all should be good.
Mind. Training.
Captain JJ Fantasticus
August 28, 2015 at 14:38
I was just about to say something in that line…kind of…maybe not as nice though.
Hammersteyn
August 28, 2015 at 13:14
I’m Batman!!!
https://media.giphy.com/media/MAfdamcHMkaR2/giphy.gif
Alien Emperor Trevor
August 28, 2015 at 13:21
Is that Oscar? :/
Hammersteyn
August 28, 2015 at 13:39
No, Oscar is keeping watch by the bathroom door.
Brady miaau
August 28, 2015 at 13:22
speaking of articles, so we voted for Zoe and Tech Girl. What happened there, is it going on?
Gavin Mannion
August 28, 2015 at 13:25
So far they are third in the listings… apparently the top 10 will speak so it seems positive… will try find out more though
RinceThis
August 28, 2015 at 13:38
Well done @disqus_DoEH3TsffU:disqus ! Balance in the universe is restored!
Alien Emperor Trevor
August 28, 2015 at 13:52
Is it really?
RinceThis
August 28, 2015 at 13:53
Watch this and tell me? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D-UmfqFjpl0&list=WL&index=3
Alien Emperor Trevor
August 28, 2015 at 13:58
NEVA!
RinceThis
August 28, 2015 at 14:05
http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-4kFWzCS-tUk/VXq13Y013iI/AAAAAAAAL3s/TGGDFyVxEsU/s640/Shia-LaBeouf-do-it-shias-everywhere-animated.gif
Captain JJ Fantasticus
August 28, 2015 at 14:40
Damn it man. Had to ruin your golden streak with a clip from a very mediocre film. You were so close to the perfect week with all your comments! ;P
Alien Emperor Trevor
August 28, 2015 at 14:49
IBWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAdon’t know whatBWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAyou’re talking aboutBWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.
Captain JJ Fantasticus
August 28, 2015 at 14:55
LOL!
HvR
August 28, 2015 at 13:53
Can’t believe it is Cute Pussy Friday Time already
Ranting Raptor
August 28, 2015 at 14:05
You are Batman! You are Batman! Everyone is Batman!!!
http://media.tumblr.com/0e5d95bbd4b3d83f99b043fa7d305198/tumblr_inline_nf82xmRf3f1qaodut.gif
The Sten
August 28, 2015 at 14:23
Look under your seats, its your parents corpses! Everybody’s Batman!!!!
Hammersteyn
August 28, 2015 at 14:30
Bwahahaha
Ranting Raptor
August 28, 2015 at 14:36
I laughed. I shouldn’t have. But I did
Captain JJ Fantasticus
August 28, 2015 at 14:34
I must be honest. That ION doesn’t look that appetizing.
Generic ZA
August 28, 2015 at 17:32
Nigerian kitty says, I’m online now, just send me your banking details and I’ll keep you in Tuna for life.