Though I think he can critique just fine, when it comes to incoming games that Darryn’s excited about, he just about always gets it all wrong. His latest absolute miss is with Rambo, The Videogame. While he obviously wasn’t expecting great, he was hoping it would be a fun, schlocky shooter that paid homage to its 1980’s action-hero roots. In a way, I suppose it has…it’s been made using 1980’s game design principles.
You know how 80’s action movies are just absolutely ludicrous, but they’re fun because of the inherent absurdity? This is nothing like that at all. It’s just bad. Here’s what others have said of the game. It’s an on-rail shooter, burdened with QTE’s, poor dialogue and an absence of fun.
IGN – 3/10: It sounds trite but I cannot stress enough how much more fun I had watching the first three Rambo films back to back in preparation for this review. They’re much cheaper and more entertaining than this game, and – even at just a shade over 90 minutes each – they lasted longer.
Eurogamer – 5/10: It would have been nice to report that the underdog turns out to be a unstoppable champion, but that was never realistically on the cards. So instead we get this: a cheesy, silly, mindless romp in which hordes of identical bad guys get turned to sticky red paste under the furious gaze of your twitching gun barrel. It’s certainly not a good game, but it is a game with zero irony. It’s not being corny and schlocky on purpose, which means that for all its faults Rambo honestly taps into the spirit of 1980s action cinema more deeply than you might expect – not in spite of its rough edges, but because of them.
Meristation –0.5/10: Rambo: The Videogame is one of the worst games that we’ve ever played. Poor and simple mechanics, a total disaster in terms of graphics and another wasted movie license.
The Escapist – 1 star: So this is Rambo: The Video Game. Ugly as sin, flimsy beyond belief, and chock full of some of the worst barely-interactive gameplay you’ll “enjoy” so far this year. Watch Hot Shots: Part Deux. Like this game, it makes an absolute mockery of the Rambo films, but it’s at least trying to be funny on purpose.
That sounds fantastic. Rambo: the videogame currently enjoys a Metacritic rating of 38 for the PC version, a laughable 18 for the Xbox 360 version and no rating on the PlayStation 3 as yet, because developer Teyon couldn’t convince enough people to play it.
Also, the header is too awesome to not re-use. Rambo: The Video Game is out this Friday on PC, PS3 and Xbox 360.
Last Updated: February 24, 2014