The good, the Bad and the Ugly of the past week–09 October 2015

5 min read
84

BEST DOGS EVER.

Your weekly dose of cabbage has been slight reduced this fine Friday as Matty has left us to Get in the Sea head to rAge. rAge, if you’ve somehow never heard of it, is an annual gathering of folk underneath the massive ceiling of the Dome where everyone pays at the door to come in and join the biggest collective human melting event of the year. Oh, and there’s video games too I guess.

Best Stories

Good news! The homegrown and totally brotastic 2D shooter Broforce finally has a release date! And you’re only going to have to wait six more days until the game emerges from Early Access like a beautiful butterfly with biceps from Benoni.

Also, have you checked out this new space explorer called The Astroneer? Even Geoff said it looks great (omitting the “Indie hipster twaddle” he put on at the end).

Worst Stories

The Witcher III is getting a phenomenally huge update to ring in the first expansion, Heart of Stone. The changelog itself is 13 pages long, and it’s going to be a hefty 15Gb download when it finally arrives. Yikes.

Also it seems that even Lara can’t outrun the trends of modern gaming, as microtransactions have been confirmed for Rise of the Tomb Raider. Having to pay a dollar for Big Head mode? Get in the sea.

Read  The best animated Batman is teaming up with Scooby Doo

But in the worst news of the week, Lazygamer All Star finally succumbed to the pressure of professional Rocket League and lost an incredibly close game to TUBE. We’ll see you in the Grand Finals though! I swear it!

Random Stories

Far Cry is going all prehistoric with a spin-off title called Primal, and it’s not actually a cheaper, smaller spin-off? What the dino is going on here?

Also, Microsoft hosted a hardware event this week and showed off stuff that they’re actually making. Yeah, Microsoft is making their own laptop. Suck on that third-party partners.

ION of the Week

watermelon

I’ll be dead honest; it wasn’t even a competition this week. thanks to a combination of the unrelenting heat and the cruel teases of rain, Geoff’s reminder that there’s a refreshing fruit called watermelon was unmatched. Now give me some, pronto!

Most Comments

Let’s face it, Sonic is no longer the blue haired gaming mascot he used to be. lost Worlds is a particularly terrible game, and now it’s coming to disappoint even more people on PC. Something which got a whole lot of you talking.

Batman of the Week

Pictured: Me, if I ever won Batman

Yes yes, you know the drill. Darryn is once again your Bat….wait what? He isn’t? Well all hail Bat emperor Geoff, who reclaims his rightful place above all of us again this week.

Read  Episode 3 of Batman: The Enemy Within arrives on November 21

Cabbage of the Week

Summer Cabbage Salad. So yummGROSS

I don’t like beating Matty every week. I also don’t like telling the truth. Congrats again Porra Bro. May your leafy bounty be plentiful!

Best Header of the Week

DX-Mankind

Would you play this Deus Ex spin-off? I would, but only after Eidos makes a Deus Ex: Dude Love returns.

Comment of the Week

I couldn’t stop laughing when I first read it, and I still can’t stop, reading it again. Well played Grand Admiral Chief (and, uh, sorry Rince). On Fallout 4 requiring Intelligence to make the most of its weapons.

Shame, so Rince can’t have the interesting weapons? That is kinda rude

Bonus Content

You’re weekly dose of Darryn Disturbia, as good old Ronald goes on a killing spree. That’ll teach you to eat a Whopper instead of a Big Mac (also, don’t show this to your children. Hell I won’t be sleeping tonight).

Last Updated: October 9, 2015

Alessandro Barbosa

You can all call me Sandy until I figure out how to edit this thing, which is probably never. Sandy not good enough? Call me xXx_J0k3R_360degreeN0Sc0pe_xXx. Also, Geoff’s a bastard.

  • Commander JJ of the Normandy

    Good for Admiral.
    Not so good for Rince.

    • Pariah

      It’s ok, Rince doesn’t know what it really means. 😉

  • Alien Emperor Trevor

    I heard if a boetterfly flexes his biceps in Benoni, cherries get heart palpitations in Kempton.

    • Commander JJ of the Normandy

      Science has spoken

  • Fnuik

    Now I will eat even less McDonnalds.

    Maybe that’s why their burgers taste like shit. It’s made from Ronald’s victims

    • Commander JJ of the Normandy

      I can’t watch the vid. 🙁
      But I definitely prefer Burger King over McDonalds at this stage.
      Ignorance is bliss?

      • Fnuik

        I love myself some extra long chili cheese from Burger King

        • Commander JJ of the Normandy

          We now have two Burger Kings very close to where we live.
          One about 500m away, and the other just over 2ks. One of which is a drive-through.
          This will not do well for my diet.

          • DragonSpirit009

            I wanted to grab some Burger King this week… Instead I just drove past the mall everytime.

          • Commander JJ of the Normandy

            The only reason why we don’t go more often is because the one 500m from us is in the mall, which sometimes (in our lazy gamer state) just seems like too much effort.
            And yes, I know how bad that sounds. 😉

          • DragonSpirit009

            You can’t tell me anything about being lazy! My father taught me well!
            My mother said she is glad I’m so lazy cause it helps me save money and loose weight! XD

          • Commander JJ of the Normandy

            That I can definitely agree with. Being lazy has made me lose weight like no diet can. Though, it’s obviously not in any healthy way.

          • Alien Emperor Trevor

            There’s a KFC 100m away from me right now. They make the best wraps, they look exactly like the ones in the ads, just have to walk across the road & I can be there in 2 min. I usually drive, which takes 5 minutes, because I’m lazy.

          • Commander JJ of the Normandy

            Haha. You know where I live, but we’ve also got one within 200m from us. Their burgers seem better than their wraps though. They usually put moerse fillets on their burgers. (side note – remember when KFC used to call them rounders? I liked that)

          • DragonSpirit009

            I have a fish and chips close by where I work. The smell of it at lunch time is killer. But luckily still lazy enough not to go spend money XD

          • Commander JJ of the Normandy

            Being lazy saves one a lot of money, I’ve found.
            Take that teachers! ;P

          • DragonSpirit009

            I’ll give you a beer for that statement!

          • I dunno hey , Have a Burger King in the Pavilion and have had from their before but apart from their crispy chicken and Extra long chilli cheese(which isn’t really) and also the unlimited refills nothing else is going for them , their chips are kinda meh…… and if the meal doesn’t have cheese then it really also ruins it , their xxl is okay at times but their beef doesn’t really bring one back, Can also kinda say with McDonalds only now order their chicken mainly grab a bunch of those R11 Chicken Burgers.

            Oh BTW guess you’ll then need to change your Name to Commander JJ of the Treadmill then:p

          • Commander JJ of the Normandy

            I think I’ve only eaten four McDonalds beef burgers ever. I tend to also only go for the chicken, when I do have it. But I haven’t had McDonalds in years.
            KFC is the only real winner for me. Burger King is just a nice change every once in a while.

            Hehe. I’m actually the lightest now I’ve been in eight years. But it’s just from eating way too little. I blame my laziness.

          • KFC-Where everything I order ever requires Zinger source hands down even their Ka ching burgers, I’ve become immune to the spiciness.

            One place I swore never to buy burgers from was Chickn Licken, seriously looks like a patty you could buy in a supermarket and just slapped some mayo and gerkin on a bun, their sliders and real hotwings are okayish.

            “but it’s just from eating way too little. I blame my laziness.”

            Laziness makes you eat less? , Sooo all those tele based excercise merch is useless all you need is Laziness :p

          • DragonSpirit009

            The only burger I’ve had so far at Burger King was the king burger. I usually smuggle it into the cinema.

          • Lol so while every person is munching down on semi stale popcorn and drinking down their 1litre coke ,your tucking away on a burger, Brilliant Idea, I needa do that from now on.

          • DragonSpirit009

            Yeah… why do you think woman have big hand bags most of the times?!

          • That explains sooo much now , it’s to store food and the occasional wallet and makeup but mostly food for the cinema.

            Mmm as a guy I wonder how I’ll achieve this feat of munching on fast food while watching a movie without being it being seen taken in?

          • DragonSpirit009

            I doubt all women do it but thats my upside to having a hand bag.
            Take a girl friend with you. Or any other friend that is game with carrying a hand bag around.
            Or a man purse XD

          • Explaining to friends that I need them to bring in food would be weird :p

            Luckily I have a sling bag I use so I think I have a full proof plan now, thanks

  • DragonSpirit009

    PUPPIES!
    Oh sorry I just get so excited when see any puppies!

    • oVg

      Can confirm 😛

      • DragonSpirit009

        I’m trying to get a new puppy at home. My mother isn’t falling for it… yet!

        • oVg

          Always 2 sides to the coin. You can feed a puppy 1 table spoon of dog food and 7 Caterpillar Industrial shovels worth of poop will come out of it.

          • DragonSpirit009

            What kind of dogs have you met then? O.O

        • Brady miaau

          Perhaps tell her it is a dog, the puppy is transient

          • DragonSpirit009

            She doesn’t want another dog either! XD
            On the upsides she isn’t saying no anymore… just staying silent. So that means the yes answer might be close!

      • After refreshing I think everyone here missed the joke xD

        • Commander JJ of the Normandy

          Oh. We need to refresh?
          Okay then.

        • Alien Emperor Trevor

          No, I guessed as much. It’s all he talks about. ;P

        • DragonSpirit009

          After I refreshed the first time I noticed the image but all I could think of was… Continue reading and post whatever you want. No one will notice! XD

  • This week is almost over!

    http://i.imgur.com/SIBgUxi.gif

    • DragonSpirit009

      So you are getting jiggy with it? 😛

      • Yup xD, Cape Town Law #641 section B – “no work shall be done after 1pm on a Friday”

        • DragonSpirit009

          Crap!! My work clearly ignores that law!! Then again I am sitting here and talking to you lot XD

          • It just states we don’t work from 1pm not that we can go home at 1pm 😛

          • DragonSpirit009

            Well they still ignore the working part! XD

          • Commander JJ of the Normandy

            I need to find a job where they don’t go aapkak on you if you leave a minute before 5 on a Friday. That would be nice.

          • I think they go aapkak everywhere

          • Commander JJ of the Normandy

            My one friend finishes work at 13:00 on Fridays, the other one 15:00 and the other one 16:00.
            So I’m always the one they’re waiting for.

          • DragonSpirit009

            I use to go home at 10 in the mornings on Fridays… then we merged with a crappy company. Now I have to sit with other people while they have work to do and I have nothing to do.

          • Commander JJ of the Normandy

            At least I have tons to do, because it doesn’t seem like many others here have any idea what they’re doing.

          • DragonSpirit009

            I have stuff to do… but its Friday. And I can go home this weekend. And I updated Warframe at work so I can play this weekend. So I really couldn’t bothered much right now XD

          • Commander JJ of the Normandy

            I still need to get that. I see just about everyone on Lagz is playing it. My entire friends list on Steam lights up with people playing it.

          • Commander JJ of the Normandy

            Okay person whose name I always forget. 😀

          • shia labeouf xD

          • Commander JJ of the Normandy

            Shes a boef. Got it!
            😀

          • Sheea lybeoef

          • Commander JJ of the Normandy

            Lumpy Space. Right.
            Pah. He wishes.
            I just say, “the transformers guy” because I always mispronounce his name anyway.

          • Commander JJ of the Normandy

            She’s one of my favourites (of not my favourite).
            That voice.

          • Gotta love LSP antics. xD

          • DragonSpirit009

            I’m still extremely new to the game… Only had a chance to play it twice so far. I never find a spot good enough to play in the house where my dogs won’t get to me!

          • Pre purchased all the gaming juice for the weekend yesterday, now I just have to get through traffic without getting peeved of my some low IQ driver and I am golden 😛

          • DragonSpirit009

            I just have to go buy baking supplies and then I have to face Stellenbosch traffic T.T

          • Commander JJ of the Normandy

            Good luck with that. I do not envy you.
            I’ve sat in bad Cape Town traffic, but Stellenbosch takes the cake….uhm… no pun intended.

          • DragonSpirit009

            I don’t do well in any traffic I stress a lot. Thou everyone said I’m so chilled. They clearly haven’t met the little goblins in my head!

          • I used to work till 5pm on a Friday… “used to” xD to this day I still don’t know how I got it changed to 3pm

          • DragonSpirit009

            Or they give you those evil death glares!

          • Commander JJ of the Normandy

            Exactly.

        • Commander JJ of the Normandy

          I can confirm this law.
          Though the company I work for seems to not agree with it.

          • Alien Emperor Trevor

            We can agree to disagree.

          • Commander JJ of the Normandy

            So nothing’s changed there then.

        • Brady miaau

          Not me. not my poor, poor testing team, who I just informed are working late………

          Now to to tell my wife.

          • Commander JJ of the Normandy

            Eish man. That sucks.

          • Brady miaau

            Yes, but is part of the territory sometimes.

          • DragonSpirit009

            Good luck with that!

    • Alien Emperor Trevor

    • DragonSpirit009

      Every time I scroll past this gif I start to wiggle along with it! XD

  • Lardus-For the Emperor!

    Puppies!!

  • I read microsoft’s laptop, and hope someone tops it

  • Grand Admiral Chief

    I go to rAge and I win comment of the week…COINCIDENCE?

Check Also

Episode 3 of Batman: The Enemy Within arrives on November 21

Season 2 of Telltale's Batman is a dark knight story where Bruce Wayne is BFFs with a prot…