Phew, it’s cold! I’m heading straight back to bed as soon as I’m done with work. Problem is, that’s many hours away still… OR IS IT? Of course not, it’s Wednesday, and I have something up my sleeve to help me, and even you, whittle that time away into nothing more than a gaming blur. Join me, friend, in being unproductive, and avoiding work this very second!
Today’s choice, inspired by this charming weather, is Snow Bros (not that it’s snowing or anything, but you get the point). As a kid, I spent many an hour lost in an arcade with nothing more than R5, and this game is one I slotted far too many 50c [Ed’s note: 50c? Pah, children!] pieces into.
Want to feel old? Snow Bros was first released in 1990 – 25 years ago. Stories were so deep back then. Don’t believe me? Here’s the premise for the game, snatched from its opening cinematic:
For many years, King Scorch had plotted to take over the world, but he knew that his armies could not defeat Prince Nick and Prince Tom of Whiteland. Then one day, King Scorch found a way to freeze his enemies in their tracks.
From high atop the crystal mountains, King Scorch used his magic to summon the winter winds and transform the two princes into snowmen. Without the protection of the princes, Whiteland was quickly conquered.
With Nick and Tom in cold storage, King Scorch invaded the tiny kingdom of Snowland and took Princess Teri and Princess Tina hostage. When Nick and Tom heard what King Scorch had done, they vowed to rescue the princesses from Scorch’s castle and restore peace to the two kingdoms
Wow. Still a better love story than Twilight AMIRITE?
The gameplay was simple too, yet incredibly addictive. As either Tom or Nick, players had the power of throwing snow out of their hands. To defeat an enemy, they had to be covered entirely with the white powder, then pushed away to their demise.
Knocking other enemies with the pushed snowball would kill them instantly too, and sometimes yield power ups. These could make the player run and jump faster, throw more powerful attacks, or throw their snow further. There was also one that inflated the player to a much larger size, allowing them to float around and kill any enemy that got touched.
Every 10 levels would yield a boss encounter. They could be quite a nuisance to tackle, especially if no power ups were acquired beforehand. Even so, the best strategy is always to turn a smaller enemy into a snowball and throw them into the large foe, yielding maximum damage.
I could never finish the game with one 50c piece alone – it always took me multiple tries. The emulator you’ll be playing is more forgiving, the NES version – costing you absolutely nothing!
How far can you get in Snow Bros? Be sure to grab a buddy, because it does make for a better experience when played co-op!
Last Updated: July 1, 2015
Alien Emperor Trevor
July 1, 2015 at 11:03
Snow Bros. pfffft! BUBBLE BOBBLE FTW!
Bagel
July 1, 2015 at 11:14
Bubble Bobble YES. that fking game stole my money. im not even mad.
Hammersteyn
July 1, 2015 at 11:14
No because I’d always get the bad ending
The Sten
July 1, 2015 at 11:19
Snow bros, bubble bobble, and what else? There was a third one where you used big wooden hammers. I cant remember its name now.
Majik
July 1, 2015 at 11:37
Ice climber I think.
The Sten
July 1, 2015 at 11:55
no not ice climber, though thats a classic too.
hairyknees
July 1, 2015 at 11:40
I was actually gonna use Bubble Bobble 🙂 but decided I would save it for another time
VampyreSquirrel
July 1, 2015 at 11:03
lol, nope! NOPE! NOPE! NOPE! NOPE!
Today is not a good day for work avoidance.
hairyknees
July 1, 2015 at 11:44
Oh but it is 😉
VampyreSquirrel
July 1, 2015 at 11:58
Oh no it isn’t… I’ve got work to do, unlike you.
Alien Emperor Trevor
July 1, 2015 at 11:06
Look at him bragging about his R5 too, way to flaunt your wealth. Fucking posh snob.
hairyknees
July 1, 2015 at 11:40
xD it might’ve been R2… I CAN’T REMEMBER I WAS LITTLE
Alien Emperor Trevor
July 1, 2015 at 11:55
Where’s your ethics in childhood memory recollection?!
hairyknees
July 2, 2015 at 12:46
#ChildhoodGate #MemoryGate #RecollectionGate
Alien Emperor Trevor
July 1, 2015 at 11:07
Is Nick the red one or the blue one? Asking for a friend.
The Sten
July 1, 2015 at 11:12
Ho far can i get? Completed it so many times. You just press f5 to get more coins when you lose. Mame32 for the win! This counts right?
hairyknees
July 1, 2015 at 11:44
Hahaha I did that too… years later 😛
Hammersteyn
July 1, 2015 at 11:14
Could finish the first stage with one token. Those damn spinning guys were the worst!
hairyknees
July 1, 2015 at 11:44
You’re the worst, but you don’t see me squandering tokens on you!
#lolol
Hammersteyn
July 1, 2015 at 13:41
LOL I meant all the way past the first boss.
Kensei Seraph - Terran Ghost
July 1, 2015 at 13:34
I’m avoiding work due to some slight disappointment right now.
The wrong window was popping up when the button was clicked, which I have now fixed, only to discover that the correct window doesn’t save properly.