You would think that after the news that Joseph Fiennes will play Michael Jackson in a fun dramedy set around the events of 9/11 that this week couldn’t get any more WTF?! And you would be wrong. Because somehow, what you might think is a prank, or some super long unfunny SNL sketch is actually real: Kevin Spacey – yes, that Kevin Spacey – really did make a movie in which he stars as a businessman who gets turned into a cat. Named Mr. Fuzzypants! And it looks effing terrible!
Maybe director Barry Sonnenfeld (Men In Black Trilogy) is playing some kind of sneaky mental game here that I’m just not getting, and he intentionally cut this newly released trailer so as to leave out any hope that this didn’t look as bad as it sounded on paper. Or maybe him and Spacey – and Christopher Walken and Jennifer Garner! – all did some really bad stuff in their youth and are now getting blackmailed into doing this piece of drek. I mean, that’s more believable than a bunch of Hollywood A-listers actually thinking this movie – a sure straight-to-Hallmark-Channel contender – is a good idea, right? RIGHT?!
Check out all the wtf-ery for yourself in the trailer below.
Here’s the very long-winded official synopsis, I guess to prove that somebody has indeed put a modicum of thought into this:
Tom Brand (Kevin Spacey) is a daredevil billionaire at the top of his game. His eponymous company FireBrand is nearing completion on its greatest achievement to date – the tallest skyscraper in the northern hemisphere. But Tom’s workaholic lifestyle has disconnected him from his family, particularly his beautiful wife Lara (Jennifer Garner) and his adoring daughter Rebecca (Malina Weissman).
Rebecca’s 11th birthday is here, and she wants the gift she wants every year, a cat. Tom hates cats, but he is without a gift and time is running out. His GPS directs him to a mystical pet store brimming with odd and exotic cats- where the store’s eccentric owner- Felix Perkins (Christopher Walken), presents him with a majestic tomcat, named Mr. Fuzzypants.
En route to his daughter’s party, Tom has a terrible accident. When he regains consciousness he discovers that somehow, he has become trapped inside the body of the cat. Adopted by his own family, he begins to experience what life is truly like for the family pet, and as a cat, Tom begins to see his family and his life through a new and unexpected perspective. Meanwhile, his family adjusts to life with an odd and stubborn cat, and his son David (Robbie Amell), steps up in ways Tom never expected.
If any hope exists of returning to his family as the husband and father they deserve, Tom will have to learn why he has been placed in this peculiar situation and the great lengths he must go to earn back his human existence.
Nine Lives is scheduled for release on August 5, 2016.
Last Updated: January 29, 2016