Oh my goodness, E3 week is upon us. All the gaming news! All the reveals! All the upsets! All the cups of coffee I’m going to have to drink to stay awake for the gauntlet of day 1 news! Hoo-boy, I think I’ll need to spend this weekend sleeping… all 48 hours of it!
Best Stories
Last weekend, a new Mortal Kombat X champion was crowned. Hooray! At the same time, Darryn retained his title and his fake wife, and his competitor Dave got teabagged. Double Hooray! In other awesome local news, Bravado secured their spot at ESWC Montreal. They’ll be competing for their share of a $75 000 prize pool!
Worst Stories
Metal Gear Solid V is getting microtransactions? Oh Konami, why are you doing this? You’re breaking our hearts!
Apparently Last Guardian is DEFINITELY MAYBE going to be at E3. Why is this under worst stories you ask? Come on, we can only have our hearts broken so many times. I have a bucket load of tears ready for the disappointment that is to come from it not being announced… again.
Random Stories
Don’t own a Wii U? Dying to play Splatoon? Here’s the closest thing you’ll get… Splatoon recreated in Mincecraft… sorta!
Did you avoid work this Wednesday? How could you not, we had Contra for on offer for crying out loud! Look, here’s the link. It’s Friday, take a load off why don’t you?
Lastly, be sure to read Darryn’s diary on a typical day at E3. It is 100% legit!
Header of the Week
Geoff did something magical this week. A typo lead to the creation of this masterpiece:
A winner for sure! And then I remembered Darryn did this magnificent piece too:
ION of the Week
As tasty looking as Geoff’s lamb post was, I know I’ll be hung by my knee hairs if I don’t choose Jessica Nigri for this week’s ION award. So here is she is… please put those torture tools away!
Most Comments
Steam refunds are being exploited? Sheesh, you all had a lot to say on that. The article gathered up 219 comments, and no, they’re ours to keep, we ain’t refunding any of them!
Least Comments
Wow, MLG are hosting their 100th event in October. “What an achievement!” I thought, expecting hundreds of people to comment on the article as a I wrote it. I only got one measly response. Why do you all hate me so? *CRIES*
Batman of the Week
That Mortal Kombat X victory provided a ton of self esteem apparently. Darryn smacked us all down confidently, proving yet again that he is the one and only Batman!
Cabbage of the Week
I am genuinely disappointed with this week’s results. Believe it or not, Zoe was a legit cabbage… I had the lead fair and square. Then she came out of nowhere and pushed me down to that muddy bottom again. Dammit!
Comment of the Week
Worms World Party is getting remastered, something Jonah Cash is very excited for:
I’d buy this for 5 to $10 but only if I can play it on PSN so that I can drop a concrete donkey on Hammersteyn’s head. That would make me smile a lot!!
Well that’s not very nice. Hammerstyn, what’s your response?
That’s funny because I call my penis concrete donkey.
I don’t even want to try and understand the implications of that comment. Jonah Cash dropping your very own… on your head… VISUALS AAAAH!
Bonus Content
Want some candy?
And keeping with the Thor theme…
Lastly, you can’t miss this gorgeous trailer. HOLY SMOKE!
Last Updated: June 12, 2015
Admiral Chief's Adventure
June 12, 2015 at 12:36
http://www.kimballstock.com/pix/MAM/14/MAM-14-KH0098-01P.JPG
Hammersteyn
June 12, 2015 at 12:41
https://scottishpoetrylibrary.files.wordpress.com/2009/11/donkey-by-mark-heffron.jpg
Pariah
June 12, 2015 at 12:44
What an ass…
Admiral Chief's Adventure
June 12, 2015 at 12:56
DAT…
DENTAL
RinceTheElfRoot
June 12, 2015 at 12:57
I raise you! http://i.giphy.com/9E2EMhGPUafVC.gif
Hammersteyn
June 12, 2015 at 13:04
rofl
Admiral Chief's Adventure
June 12, 2015 at 13:05
COME AT ME BRO
HvR
June 12, 2015 at 15:00
http://www.biyokulule.com/sawiro/sawirada_waaweyn/Donkey%20Meat2.jpg
Patricia A. Bradley
June 13, 2015 at 11:06
Make Extra 61$ daily@ lazygamer
>/
Admiral Chief's Adventure
June 12, 2015 at 12:36
At least I cared about your silly article!
Pariah
June 12, 2015 at 12:37
[Mandatory staff support comment] doesn’t count.
Admiral Chief's Adventure
June 12, 2015 at 12:38
Actually it was not that
Pariah
June 12, 2015 at 12:39
You feathers. Did I ruffle them?
Admiral Chief's Adventure
June 12, 2015 at 12:40
Not in the least
Pariah
June 12, 2015 at 12:41
Sure. I believe you.
http://www.quickmeme.com/img/3b/3bd6cfa7668cdf4dc7b3482786b462f4cb33ee87083d9dd5a752608279ca1052.jpg
Hammersteyn
June 12, 2015 at 12:42
*Your
**Flies away
Pariah
June 12, 2015 at 12:42
Why?!?!?
*sobs*
*fixed
Hammersteyn
June 12, 2015 at 12:46
Disqus is acting up again?
Pariah
June 12, 2015 at 12:46
Nope. My English took a break.
Hammersteyn
June 12, 2015 at 12:49
My English is break
Pariah
June 12, 2015 at 12:49
*breakeded
Hammersteyn
June 12, 2015 at 12:50
XD
Admiral Chief's Adventure
June 12, 2015 at 12:37
Heehee YAY
Low Key
hairyknees
June 12, 2015 at 13:05
Would you like some candy? 😛
Hammersteyn
June 12, 2015 at 12:38
Me and @jonahcash:disqus right now
http://i.memeful.com/media/post/1RXGGDM_700wa_0.gif
hairyknees
June 12, 2015 at 13:06
I don’t see a concrete donkey? 😛
Admiral Chief's Adventure
June 12, 2015 at 13:21
See below (short and hairy)
Captain JJ the_scarrrr
June 12, 2015 at 13:29
I’m more curious to know who thinks he’s whom in that gif
Hammersteyn
June 12, 2015 at 13:39
I’m wearing pants
Jonah Cash
June 12, 2015 at 13:29
Why are we such an awesome duo!! Also I am on the left of this gif yes?
Hammersteyn
June 12, 2015 at 13:39
Of course!
Hammersteyn
June 12, 2015 at 12:40
Darryn is Bertmen!
http://media.giphy.com/media/SPUZI4t2geCMU/giphy.gif
hairyknees
June 12, 2015 at 13:08
I suppose that makes Geoff Superman xD
Hammersteyn
June 12, 2015 at 13:39
hahaha
ElimiNathan
June 12, 2015 at 12:51
And the best news of the week, I got my GTX 980Ti today 😀
Pariah
June 12, 2015 at 12:51
My hate. It consumes me.
ElimiNathan
June 12, 2015 at 12:53
😛 Just wish this work day would end already
Pariah
June 12, 2015 at 12:55
I understand completely. Enjoy man
ElimiNathan
June 12, 2015 at 12:56
😀
hairyknees
June 12, 2015 at 13:07
:O
Mossel
June 12, 2015 at 13:33
Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat!!!! And here I thought I was cool with my gtx970 I got last week!
ElimiNathan
June 12, 2015 at 13:34
Haha, 970 still a really good card, nothing wrong with that choice at all
Mossel
June 12, 2015 at 13:35
Nothing indeed. It was the best price/performance ratio I could find. I just cant justify R10k on a gpu right now. But damn, I would love one!
ElimiNathan
June 12, 2015 at 13:55
Nobody can justify it, you just have to do it!
Captain JJ Browmehn
June 12, 2015 at 13:44
970 ftw
Mossel
June 12, 2015 at 13:34
What did you get, and where, and how much? Just for interest’s sake.
ElimiNathan
June 12, 2015 at 13:56
Gigabyte 980TI with Reference Cooler. Cool thing is it comes with Batman Arkham Knight.
Paid R11800
Edit* Got it from Rebel Tech, they were one of the 2 companies that had stock in SA this week, more stock available from next week all over
Captain JJ the_scarrrr
June 12, 2015 at 13:27
I voted for you Hammer. Got your back bro ;P
Jonah Cash
June 12, 2015 at 13:31
Why am I sharing comment of the week with Hammer? I demand a recount!
Aries
June 12, 2015 at 14:34
Ratchet and Clank, love these types of games, please bring back Crash Bandicoot